dembe
No lights, No music, JUST ANGER
- Feb 13, 2023
- 33
Idk if you do tw here but tw self harm
I was washing a bowl, bowl broke, it slit my wrist, i knew i missed it but my god, the blood rushing out, seeing a bit of my own flesh, i didnt even care it was dripping i just immediately began wrapping the bowl up while my mind screamed "take the rest of the bowl and start cutting youre already bleeding this wont count" but i knew deep down it would. Actively and consciously looking to hurt myself is self harm, i threw the rest away, and just stared at my blood leaving me. There is no way im not an addict for this shit. I love it so much but im not going to actively push it.
Here's me being healthy and recovered or whatever: if i start again, i WILL take it too far, I have given myself nerve damage and it lead to EXTREME PAIN, i will not go back. Im walking away, i will be alright, im chill, again, never going back. No hope, just i fucking wont.
I was washing a bowl, bowl broke, it slit my wrist, i knew i missed it but my god, the blood rushing out, seeing a bit of my own flesh, i didnt even care it was dripping i just immediately began wrapping the bowl up while my mind screamed "take the rest of the bowl and start cutting youre already bleeding this wont count" but i knew deep down it would. Actively and consciously looking to hurt myself is self harm, i threw the rest away, and just stared at my blood leaving me. There is no way im not an addict for this shit. I love it so much but im not going to actively push it.
Here's me being healthy and recovered or whatever: if i start again, i WILL take it too far, I have given myself nerve damage and it lead to EXTREME PAIN, i will not go back. Im walking away, i will be alright, im chill, again, never going back. No hope, just i fucking wont.
