So basically I read through this whole thread and just gathered as much info as I could and ran trial and error on myself. Different positions on my neck, slow or fast all while just holding the rope using both hands to try to find my spot. None of those worked for me to find the spot or not hurt. Being frustrated and knowing I don't care I set it up on my door anyway. I would not recommend practicing this way for obvious reasons but to explain as much as I can. It is fully set up and ready for me to ctb and when I have more confidence I won't have to do anything but fully go through with it. With that set up over been putting my head through using a pillowcase lightly tied around my neck just for some padding not tight almost like you'd wear a scarf. Head goes in for practice and I slowly ease myself down back against the door legs sliding in front of me. My body is almost in an L position. For practice I have been keeping my feet planted kinda like digging my heels into the ground so I can stand up easy. Again this is practicing so im going at my own speed.
At this point im still in total control if I feel the rope is going to slide weird or in the wrong position ill stand back up readjust and lower again. While doing this I can tell because im going slow what its cutting off. Yes sometimes I hit the wrong spot close the jugular or something else and can immediately tell its wrong but when I do it right as im lowering myself on the door I can feel the rope covering the carotid and closing it.
When that happens it is very much like what everyone says. Its quick. Honestly to me it feels within 5 seconds. My vision goes there is a really strange sensation in my head. Its almost like a panic probably my SI. With mer knowing im practicing this is usually my jump moment where I stand myself up and loosen the noose. This is probably not great as its training my brain how to avoid what I want as well but because of how quick it is for me to black out I know It'll work for me. There is a tingling feeling that goes through my whole body and to me it almost feels like a rush of adrenaline. My fight or flight kicking in but not in a bad way. Every time I've been able to hit my spot I come out feeling excited. The euphoric feeling everyone describes is true. Even though youre putting pressure and cutting off blood flow it feels very freeing like the pressure of your life is being taken off.
I can't advise on where to position the rope but I can say when its in the right spot you instantly know and when its in the wrong spot you also know. Its trial and error and practice and knowledge mixed with a lot of fuck it just do it. The very first time I tried practicing on the door it was in the very wrong spot and as soon as I slide down it caused me to cough and throw up. Some runs instead of cutting off air I can tell its in the wrong spot because swallowing feels like im drowning. Ive even been trying to work on just getting my legs out quicker with more of a fast drop to simulate the full thing.
Again I can't recommend trying this way as it is very dangerous. If I hit my spot and stay just a few seconds too long im gone unless it fails and honestly every practice run that I've hit my spot I feel like I make it out at just the last second. I know this is a terrible way to practice but I also know when I attempt fully I do believe it'll be easier because ill fully know what to expect and ill just shoot the legs out and go for it and be done with it.
