Help How do you find reasons to live?

[miserabletranny]

I think I will cbt eventually, and I would like to soon, though realistically I probably have a few more years left. I have some reasons to live, but they're not enough to keep me. I love my cat, my friends are good people, some of my family is good, I want to transition further, and I want to get an entomology graduate degree. I also want to be there when Deltarune chapter 7 is released, because it is currently my favorite video game and I want to see it be finished. My main reason for wanting to cbt is that being trans sucks, and I have a lot of anger towards my body and how difficult it is to transition, and how I will still never be male or be seen as male by many people even if I fully complete my transition.

These reasons do help me, but sometimes I just want to cbt myself so much that nothing helps me.

I guess my real question is how do I put more into my current reasons to live, or how do I find real reasons to live?

 

[stupid trans guy]

Hii! Weve twlked before >.< im glad u were able to come up with some things on your own! I think that is a horrible reason to ctb, there are so many awesome people ik who are trans, and so many lovley people who will support you, i think you need to go to a place that has that ml

Also, if reincarnation is real, u could be a woman or transmasc person again so i feel like itd defeat the purpose.

Some things i live for, u can use this to help
- boba (favorite drink, idk whats up in the afterlife)
- Breadsticks
- Splatoon 4 (video game)
- Season 4/5 of jjk (favorite anime/show)
- Outliving people i despise, specific political figures
- Getting to visit my dream vacation or living area ^^
- telling my grandma im a homosexual and cutting contact
- Getting a job i actually enjoy
- Swimming with sharks
- Getting a cat <3
Also obviously people irl will be devastated, wether u wanna believe it or not, and there is ALWAYS a chance everything will change, and life will get better, sometimes u js gotta bushwack ur way back to the start of the fork in the road and pick a new path.

Also if other ppl are making u feel worse abt ur transition or how u feel abt urself, i suggest not looking at them at all. Ur perfect <3

 

[miserabletranny]

Hi, I do remember you. I hate being trans because dysphoria is awful and being trans is just a nightmare overall, and ctb seems like the most logical option for me. I don't really care if reincarnation is real because this is the only life I'm aware of. I'm glad you have reasons to live, but most of the time I would rather be dead than live for the reasons I named.

 

[wehamuho]

Also, if reincarnation is real, u could be a woman or transmasc person again so i feel like itd defeat the purpose.

id avoid using fear as reason 2 live as feels an artificial imposition & not purpose!
a cat can help yes but i warn op might not like it if the choice is rushed or for depression sake & not animal love. but if op maturely informs then yes it can work very well just b sure its not just 2 feel better & theres deeper purpose behind.

on the other hand i agree id like to see funeral of donardo turompo

 

[stupid trans guy]

id avoid using fear as reason 2 live as feels an artificial imposition & not purpose!
a cat can help yes but i warn op might not like it if the choice is rushed or for depression sake & not animal love. but if op maturely informs then yes it can work very well just b sure its not just 2 feel better & theres deeper purpose behind.

on the other hand i agree id like to see funeral of donardo turompo

i agree w u! I want a cat not js bec of depression, ive wanted one since i was a little kiddo

 

[baeblade]

The only thing that keeps me going is the dream of transitioning some day, as I currently cant. I just keep thinking, I don't wanna die with my deadname on the tombstone and without ever knowing what its like to be in my own body. I feel like right now I'm just a vessel for a person, and I don't want to be that in my final moments, I have to live as myself at least a little bit.

 

[SealsOfTheArctic]

I visited my grandmother today. She's 98 and has already outlived one son. I don't want her to mourn me so for the time being I can't CTB as much as I want to. She's my reason for staying alive.

 

[miserabletranny]

The only thing that keeps me going is the dream of transitioning some day, as I currently cant. I just keep thinking, I don't wanna die with my deadname on the tombstone and without ever knowing what its like to be in my own body. I feel like right now I'm just a vessel for a person, and I don't want to be that in my final moments, I have to live as myself at least a little bit.

I'm glad that helps you. I know if I died now I would be buried as a woman, but I don't care what's on my tombstone other than the fact I'm dead right now :(

 

[baeblade]

I'm glad that helps you. I know if I died now I would be buried as a woman, but I don't care what's on my tombstone other than the fact I'm dead right now :(

It's not really the tombstone but how you are remembered. It's like my soul would be cursed under the wrong name forever or something.

 

[PeaceSeeker83]

I visited my grandmother today. She's 98 and has already outlived one son. I don't want her to mourn me so for the time being I can't CTB as much as I want to. She's my reason for staying alive.

98. An outlier indeed.