Help How do I maintain friendships?

[Higgy123]

I scare people off with my intense need for one close friend. How can I find groups of people to mingle with? Or curb myself from diving in too quickly.

 

[HGL91]

Meetup.com is a good way to make friends, I find.

 

[Wayfaerer]

Do you not have any close siblings? My sister has always been my rock even if she doesn't "get" many of the problems that I have. If that's what you want, then get a hobby where you can interact with people. If it wasn't for university, I wouldn't have any friends, but I also don't talk about my personal issues with them. I've always tried very hard to maintain the illusion that I don't have any.

 

[pole]

i guess distinguishing a pattern in you're past experiences in how you tried to make friends.

perhaps you were too pushy, overwhelmed them, came off way too strong. acknowledge these things and better yourself in preparing for future conversations as an initiator.

put yourself in someone elses shoes, how would you want someone to approach you and talk to you? what do you think is wise to say and isnt, etc.

be critical of yourself. Only then will you learn and grow from your past interactions; otherwise its gonna be a reoccuring cycle of failing interactions.

step out of ur comfort zone, put yourself in situations where your forced to meet and talk to people. whether it be events at school, volunteer work, retail jobs, etc.

Hope this helps, and hope things work out for you.

 

[Tom9999]

Taking up dance - swing, salsa, etc... - quickly exposed me to hundreds of new faces through taking lessons and attending dances. You get to know many people because you change partners during lessons and after every song at dances. This is a good and fun way to obtain access to big groups of people to meet and mingle with.

Also doing group events - museum tours, bowling, MeetUps, hobby groups, and the like.

If you play an instrument or sing, joining a music group is a great way to meet others in the scene.

I've met lots of people and made some good friends doing these things. I wish you success and fun in your quest!

 

[Wayfaerer]

Keep in regular contact and do not let too much time pass in between.