How can people have friendships/relationships and want to CTB

[Tyra]

I have no friends. I don't talk to anyone. I barely talk to my family, mostly just "Good" "Yeah" "No" and they don't even notice. They talk a lot.

I think I'm lucky I don't have any friendships/relationship.
1. There's less people I'll hurt when I CTB
2. They make it harder to commit to CTB
3. It's work to maintain it
4. It's always conditional

I guess everyone's different tho. I feel like I'm probably like this because I'm neurodivergent.

I still can't imagine ever wanting to CTB if there's people who care about me. And yeah my family cares about me, but that is not something I can control. I didn't chose for them to be in my life.

 

[happysunnydayy]

Ive a sister who loves me and understands me but I wanna die every second of my day.

 

[Tyra]

Ive a sister who loves me and understands me but I wanna die every second of my day.

Family doesn't count because we can't chose wether to keep family in our life or not. I also have a sibling who loves me.

 

[happysunnydayy]

Family doesn't count because we can't chose wether to keep family in our life or not. I also have a sibling who loves me.

Why's family love not enough ?

 

[SchizoPolyGymnast]

It's possible to be surrounded by people who love you, and yet still feel as though they never met the real you. Or that your connection to them is surface level.

 

[ilovecats1]

i have a lot of friends and two sisters that i live together with that love me and it makes it so much harder for me. i wish people just didnt care about me i dont even understand how they do i literally dont deserve it. i still think about ctb constantly but i couldnt get my sn package because i was scared my sisters would find out before i could attempt.

 

[Tyra]

Why's family love not enough ?

That's not what I said. We don't chose our family and we can't really leave them in our life. It's difficult to leave them.

It's possible to be surrounded by people who love you, and yet still feel as though they never met the real you. Or that your connection to them is surface level.

But how can someone maintain a relationship/friendship during very bad depression.