Discussion Have you thought about your funeral? do you want an input? do you care?

[weedoge]

Yeah. The cheapest basic funeral has went up almost £200 to approaching 2k. Oh well.

Crazy I never knew that, why are all the most important things in life the hardest to obtain? Homes, funerals... Okay I can't think of others but still why.

 

[weedoge]

I guess funeral parlors don't expect repeat customers so maybe that's why lol

 

[Wantingpeace]

I guess funeral parlors don't expect repeat customers so maybe that's why lol

 

[RainAndSadness]

I don't want a funeral. I'm gonna make this very clear when I exit. I want to be forgotten as fast as possible. They should drop my body into a river somewhere to save money.

 

[bigj75]

I don't want a funeral. I'm gonna make this very clear when I exit. I want to be forgotten as fast as possible. They should drop my body into a river somewhere to save money.

Damn. Cold blooded but respected!

 

[Nanimoaru]

All I know is my mother and her current husband aren't welcome
Everyone else is tho

 

[Smilla]

No. Just want to be cremated and forgotten ASAP.

 

[Midnight]

I'm just hoping i will leave enough money to pay for the funeral. I assume 5-8k € should do it. I will sell one of 2 cars beforehand and probably treat myself with that money and they can then sell off the other one for some extra cash. I already have savings in the bank that would cover funeral cost but these are pension/house related (8k€) and blocked from acces until then ... I'm not going to spook people at the bank asking what happens with that money when i die (and even if suicide makes a difference vs other types of death)

I've blown all the rest i had trying to feel better for short time :(

I have tought countless times about how my funeral would look like but i care less now than i used to.

 

[Readytoendit]

Its funny I haven't even thought about a funeral, and I doubt many people other than family would want to attend.

 

[VincentValentine]

I just don't want my relatives to have anything to do with my death/funeral. Really I'd prefer they didn't even find out about it.

 

[Escape Humanity]

I couldn't care less about funerals or what happens to my body after I die. I think funerals (coffins, urns, headstones, burial plots, Etc.) are a waste of time and money. The fact that some people spend more money on funerals than the average person spends on a wedding is ridiculous. I can understand why some people would feel the need to pay for a service to celebrate the life and morn the death of a loved one, but I'm not one of those people.

 

[skitliv]

Ideally I'd go straight into the oven

 

[Anyara]

I ask for them to cremate me and made a playlist with some music i like so they can pick that to play or listen to of they like. I know they want to have a form or ceremony for closure so who am I to deny them that.
I know they will cremate me like I asked and what they do with my ashes I really could not care less, would be cool if they threw it at someone I hated or something maybe lol

 

[Desperate_Soul]

I really hope my family carries out what I've written down. Not much I can do if they don't as I'll be dead, but as it's my last wish, I hope they'll respect and honor them.

 

[TAW122]

I haven't really thought too much about it and personally, I care a little bit but care much more about succeeding in my attempt when I get around to it. If anything, I would wish that people don't make my death about mental illness or irrationality, but face the truth - which is that when I choose suicide (inevitable given where I am in life), that it is due to the shitty life circumstances and that I am unable to deal with it nor wish to continue fighting a losing war for little or no gain.

Also, I would want them to know that it is my decision and mine alone. Then again, I am unable to control how they react, think, or what they do afterwards as I'll be dead; so what I want is just merely a wish..

 

[Jon]

Luckily none of us have to attend our funeral, and whether it happens or not, or what music is played, or whether so and so is there or what those two in corner are saying - we'll be blissfully unaware of it all! The same doesn't apply if we end up in hospital. So like the guy above said, my main concern is getting the job done, successfully, and my second concern is to try to mitigate some of pain, though I accept that no one except a very few die without pain, be it at his own hands or by some incurable disease or through an accident. Everything ceases after death so wishing for our favourite songs to be played at our funeral is like wishing that our parents had been listening to our favourite songs at the moment of our conception!

 

[Dead_Inside]

I get pissed off thinking about out sometimes. My funeral- so stupid. Why are they going to waste money on me then? I am not good enough right now to bother with.
I don't want anyone to say anything .... just bury me. Don't pretend to care and be fucking sad when I am dead.
What you say to my face while I am alive is all you should get.

 

[weedoge]

Wow I suppose that's more than I expected that don't want a funeral. If I think about it there really is only about 5 people max that would attend mine and honestly I question the sincerity of all of them.

 

[DeathBecomesMe]

Wow I suppose that's more than I expected that don't want a funeral. If I think about it there really is only about 5 people max that would attend mine and honestly I question the sincerity of all of them.

Yup. That's why I don't want a funeral either. I've been to a number of funerals, and often the 'mourners' are more there to socialize and enjoy the food/tea. Most people are just selfish I guess. I've been to funerals where friends died at a young age, 16, 19, 21, and my girlfriend as well who was 16. The younger the crowd is at a funeral, the less sincere it is. It just turns into one big social event where everyone gets hammered afterwards, thinking highly of themselves for 'caring' about the loss of the deceased, which is actually just plain virtue signaling. The real under current that I get a sense of from them is: "Phew, Brad's dead and I'm still here and should have plenty of time left, thank god."

It's the age of the plastic people epidemic. The same people that shout jump to an indecisive jumper. Conversely, when you are at a funeral for someone who died at 80 odd, if the funeral goers are also nearing their end, again their demeanor is subjective, yet this time they are concerned and serious. Why, because they know their own time is near.

 

[weedoge]

I get pissed off thinking about out sometimes. My funeral- so stupid. Why are they going to waste money on me then? I am not good enough right now to bother with.
I don't want anyone to say anything .... just bury me. Don't pretend to care and be fucking sad when I am dead.
What you say to my face while I am alive is all you should get.

Yup. That's why I don't want a funeral either. I've been to a number of funerals, and often the 'mourners' are more there to socialize and enjoy the food/tea. Most people are just selfish I guess. I've been to funerals where friends died at a young age, 16, 19, 21, and my girlfriend as well who was 16. The younger the crowd is at a funeral, the less sincere it is. It just turns into one big social event where everyone gets hammered afterwards, thinking highly of themselves for 'caring' about the loss of the deceased, which is actually just plain virtue signaling. The real under current that I get a sense of from them is: "Phew, Brad's dead and I'm still here and should have plenty of time left, thank god."

It's the age of the plastic people epidemic. The same people that shout jump to an indecisive jumper. Conversely, when you are at a funeral for someone who died at 80 odd, if the funeral goers are also nearing their end, again their demeanor is subjective, yet this time they are concerned and serious. Why, because they know their own time is near.

Well luckily I genuinely have no friends that would be able to attend unless my best irl friend would travel across the country to it, but I doubt that he's an anxious wreck too. I was thinking about this a lot but I think I now decided against the music thing for my funeral. I would be happy not to have one. Instead I decided I'm writing a very long note with the purpose of documenting my reasons for ctb in excruciatingly neurotic detail. The foreword being the classic suicide not apologies and etc and then the rest of it is going to be drawn out reasoning on a number of subjects that affected me and my decision. It satisfies three urges of mine to have another creative output since all others were destroyed (nothing I've ever made still survives), to be listened to (I really hope it might be seen by a lot of people, superficial urge but I want to satisfy it to increase the peacefulness of my death) and the desire to provide a good explanation and insight for my family so they can maybe come to the conclusion that there was nothing they could do and maybe they should try not to feel as much grief as they might have originally felt without the note. I'll probably post this thing everywhere and it'll be an open note to everybody.. It feels like a much better way to be "listened to" than to just leave a couple of musical suggestions, this is much more true to me I think.

and in regards to my body, I just want my cats to be laid in the same place as me, that's all.

 

[DeathBecomesMe]

I mean, you could still have a funeral, as well as the lengthy note. If it's not going to be too many that are present, then chances are the occasion will be intimate and thus authentic and might help toward consoling your loved ones.

I think, ultimately, the greatest role of a funeral could be to provide closure. Like a reference point for the people that will remember you. The thing about dying is that it can be difficult to understand for the surviving parties, as you were here and suddenly you aren't. It's something the mind has difficulty grappling with.

Your note sounds like it will be quite the piece of work. I think it's really thoughtful of you, going into detail to try and ease your family's worries or guilt, concerns etc. and to provide whatever relief you can.

And I really like that you will have your cats laid to rest with you. I feel the same about my sweet son (my sausage dog) that passed earlier this year. I just want to be with him forever, so I totally get that.

 

[weedoge]

Luckily none of us have to attend our funeral, and whether it happens or not, or what music is played, or whether so and so is there or what those two in corner are saying - we'll be blissfully unaware of it all! The same doesn't apply if we end up in hospital. So like the guy above said, my main concern is getting the job done, successfully, and my second concern is to try to mitigate some of pain, though I accept that no one except a very few die without pain, be it at his own hands or by some incurable disease or through an accident. Everything ceases after death so wishing for our favourite songs to be played at our funeral is like wishing that our parents had been listening to our favourite songs at the moment of our conception!

Many people seem to find it silly to care about what happens after you die but there are valid, deep, personal reasons. You're right that it won't be relevant or matter once I'm dead but its called a dying wish for a reason. I wish to for people to listen and take an interest in the things I liked. I was never able to achieve that in life so I'll use my death to force it onto a few!

I'm not too concerned either way but shared a few pieces for them to play if they were to have any ceremony. I also want my cats to be buried with me even though that won't matter after I'm gone, given my beliefs, I just have a few last irrational desires I'd like to indulge.

 

[Jon]

Many people seem to find it silly to care about what happens after you die but there are valid, deep, personal reasons. You're right that it won't be relevant or matter once I'm dead but its called a dying wish for a reason. I wish to for people to listen and take an interest in the things I liked. I was never able to achieve that in life so I'll use my death to force it onto a few!

I'm not too concerned either way but shared a few pieces for them to play if they were to have any ceremony. I also want my cats to be buried with me even though that won't matter after I'm gone, given my beliefs, I just have a few last irrational desires I'd like to indulge.

People are different, and so I understand your wish. It's like that man who created a website dedicated to his life, like an autobiography. Absolutely nothing wrong with that in my opinion, and I liked it even more because it was quite witty and filled with dark humour (like the treasure hunt).

Despite what I wrote in my post there are some things I would prefer, even though they are irrational. Some thoughts play on my mind more than they should, and one in particular would make suicide far more complicated than it to needs to be. But I try to forcibly convince myself that they are irrelevant.

 

[weedoge]

People are different, and so I understand your wish. It's like that man who created a website dedicated to his life, like an autobiography. Absolutely nothing wrong with that in my opinion, and I liked it even more because it was quite witty and filled with dark humour (like the treasure hunt).

Despite what I wrote in my post there are some things I would prefer, even though they are irrational. Some thoughts play on my mind more than they should, and one in particular would make suicide far more complicated than it to needs to be. But I try to forcibly convince myself that they are irrelevant.

Honestly we could get into a long conversation about the irrationality and absurdity of living and wanting anything at all, you're right that people are different and have their wishes. It won't matter soon. Thanks for the chat :)

 

[Maksimka Ai]

Странно, но меня беспокоит открытие моего тела и капание в него. Я хотел бы быть кремированным. Без этих чертовых прощаний могилы, надгробия и моя пыль рассыпались по Сиамскому заливу. Да, и я сомневаюсь, что кто-то будет долго горевать, поэтому они наверняка не откажутся от салатов, чтобы поесть)))

 

[Bärchen]

I don't care, they can feed me to the pig if they want to.

 

[marcusuk63]

Make it cheap. Funerals can be a financial burden.

just a money making racket , if i had to although i prefer not to e found i would go with this local one Cheap and simple ...http://www.simplecremationshull.co.uk/prices.html

 

[elcade]

i try to manage all the "funeral stuff" looking for what kind of urn, where the cremation can be done on what price. even the place where ill cbt will be chosen in order to reduce the cost for my transfer. "The outfit", i clean my room and all the stuff that i have unnecessary stored etc..
So yes it's important for me to prepare that and i think about it a lot.

 

[tomz323]

just a money making racket , if i had to although i prefer not to e found i would go with this local one Cheap and simple ...http://www.simplecremationshull.co.uk/prices.html

This is what I would want too, I really hate the idea of my funeral. Better just to be done with it.

 

[RedSalvation15]

Personally, I just want a Cremation with no ceremony, if it comes to an end.

I wouldn't say that funerals are a complete bullshit. If it helps and calms the family and friends of the decdent at least a little bit, then yeah... why not, if you can afford it.
I guess it depends what you associate with death. If death means "over and out forever" for you, then you won't really care about a funeral / ceremony.
If you are religious in any way, then you may think very well about that stuff.