miekorevvv
Member
- Aug 8, 2024
- 23
the amount of hatred towards myself and to anyone i knew from the past who witnessed my downfall i have is crazy and i genuinely am starting to feel like if i kill myself ill have my revnge against myself the world and everyone even tho obviously not everyone wronged me but at the same time i feel some sort of revenge/resentment towards me growing even all of my fantasies or daydreams have all become centered about me creating a god or becoming one having some sort of boss fight and then get killed like i always want to end up losing and getting killed my self hatred has reached those levels like anything i fanatize about positevely or negatively has to deal with my death in some sort of way sooner or later like even rn i cant stand the fact i am myself and i actually breathe eat/drink etc or anything add with this and this has become a complete new habit of mine i just cannot standing talking or being in the same place with someone who is happy in their life(or acts like) or anyone who succeeded anything in their life i just feel disgust and sort of hatred when i see others succeed and im surprised cuz this is compltely new of mine and i never had similar thoughts before cuz i just didnt care at all but now i feel hatred and its even towards my origins/location/people/past literally everything in my life and i genuinely never had these thoughts before all of these are brand new of this year and it surprises me how much a singular year fucked me up
