Venting General thread for my vents about wanting to die

[billie]

I hope you're okay

 

[FuneralCry]

The terrible suffering existence causes.
No matter what existence will always be something so terrible, existence truly does cause endless amounts of harm and torment and that's why I'd certainly prefer to not exist as after all if one doesn't exist then they cannot suffer in any way and to not suffer is all I wish for.

What is so terrible about existence is that there is literally no limit as to how torturous it can get, if one is tormented now and really struggling then it can very easily get much more unbearable for them and this can happen instantly and it can be way way worse than one can ever imagine it to and this terrifies me.

What I fear is suffering way more unbearably in the future, I fear how harmful and immensley cruel existence is, it truly is so terrible how existing beings have to suffer so much until they die anyway. And what I find so devastating is how despite the fact we exist in this reality humans are denied the option to be euthanised with the focus being on trapping them in their existences and prolonging the suffering as much as possible instead. It's truly just so painful how this is the reality, all I wish for is to not exist to escape from all this terrible suffering, under no circumstances would I ever wish to decay from age in this existence where there is unlimited potential for agony and torture, I'd never ever wish for the torment of existing as a conscious being, it's something so terrible that I'd prefer to avoid no matter what.

 

[FuneralCry]

Existing truly is just a process of slowly dying.
It really is, having the ability to exist really is just a torturous and futile process of slowly dying where humans are destined for nothing but to decay and deteriorate with every second being one closer to the inevitable yet this process causes immense suffering all for the sake of it. It's so tragic to me how I have to suffer in this pointless existence that was completely unnecessary in the first place that was only ever the most hopeless process of slowly dying, existing truly is just waiting around to die and I'm tired of waiting.

I'm tired of the pain of existing as a conscious being, I just want nothingness and I'd always prefer to not exist than to be tormented by old age in this existence that was just a terrible mistake that caused nothing but pain in the first place. So sad how I have to struggle in this existence when there were never any disadvantages to never existing at all, more than anything I wish I never suffered in this existence so painful and undesirable, existing truly is just a process of slowly dying and it's one I never would have chosen.

 

[FuneralCry]

Hoping to sleep again.
I'm always hoping to sleep, I really hope I fall asleep soon as I'm so tired of suffering, I'm tired of the torment of existing as a conscious being, existing is just too hopeless, cruel and painful which is why I just wish to sleep, I only wish for the peace of eternal sleep. It truly does feel like I've suffered in this existence for far too long and it's so sad how I had to suffer in the first place, the hurt that existence causes is endless, I hope to permanently fall asleep and forget about it.

Under no circumstances would I ever wish to be burdened with existence, I just want nothingness, I just want some peace and all that can bring me such is eternal sleep, all I wish is to never suffer in this existence ever again.

 

[FuneralCry]

Not wanting to suffer in any way.
In my case I simply don't wish to suffer in any way, I don't wish for the cruel and torturous burden of existing as a human, I wouldn't wish for existence under any circumstances, rather all I wish for is the peace of eternal nothingness. To me existence is just a terrible tragic mistake, I find it so sad how I suffer in this pointless existence, there's so much sadness in being trapped in this existence filled with endless suffering.

More than anything I wish I never suffered at all as existence is just too cruel and painful, I see nothing desirable about being tormented in this meaningless existence, rather I'd prefer to avoid such no matter what as I don't want to suffer and to me it feels like existence causes nothing but suffering, all I feel is fear and dread for what lies ahead, I wish I could just permanently fall asleep and forget about it all because I'm certainly not meant for existing.

 

[FuneralCry]

Existence causes endless torment.
It's so terrible and horrific how existence causes all this endless torment with existing beings suffering so unnecessarily all because they were unfortunate enough to be forced into this reality where there is endless potential to feel pain. The fact that existing beings are tormented every second truly is so immensely tragic to me, I'd never wish to exist in this reality filled with unlimited cruelty and harm, to me existence is the problem, it's just a terrible mistake, what I have a problem with is existence itself as after all it's the ultimate cause of all that makes one suffer and I don't want to suffer in any way.

I fear the endless torment and agony this existence causes, it terrifies me how there is no limit as to how much one can suffer as long as they exist here, I find it terrifying how this existence can continue for so long, I just wish for a way to just painlessly die to escape from this existence that caused nothing but suffering.

To exist as a conscious being will always be deeply hopeless and undesirable to me, I'd always prefer to not exist as after all one cannot be harmed by an eternal, dreamless sleep, only in eternal nothingness will I be safe from all torment but of course I wish I was never tormented by this existence at all, I wish I never existed more than anything as existence caused nothing but pain and hurt.

 

[FuneralCry]

Non-existence will always be preferable to me.
No matter what I'll always see eternal non-existence where one cannot suffer in any way where all is forgotten about as being personally preferable to being tormented in this existence so cruel, in my case I only wish to not exist, I'd never wish for the terrible and torturous burden of existing where there is endless potential to suffer and feel agony.

I find it so sad and painful to exist, I know that I'm just not meant for existence as well and really should have never existed at all. Non-existence is always preferable to me as after all there are no disadvantages to not existing, only in non-existence will I be safe from all suffering, free from all harm and unable to feel pain which is exactly what I wish for.

It comforts me to think of this existence eternally disappearing into nothingness with me unable to experience anything for all eternity and I'd never wish to experience anything at all, instead I just wish to simply be unaware. I personally don't see any value in being tormented by this meaningless existence just to die slowly and painfully from old age, the thought of such really scares me, I find it terrifying how a human can exist for so long in this world filled with endless suffering, I just wish to sleep for all eternity to escape from it all, only non-existence is ideal to me but of course the only true perfection lies in never existing at all.

 

[FuneralCry]

Only death can take away my suffering.
No matter what only death can take away the suffering this cruel, torturous existence causes me to experience, I know that as long as I exist I'll suffer and I'd never wish to suffer, instead I just wish for nothingness. I only find comfort in death as I believe it to be nothing more than dreamless, eternal sleep where all is finally forgotten about, all that I find comforting is the thought of never being able to suffer again, I only wish to not exist, I simply wish to be unaware without the ability to feel pain, I just don't wish to experience anything at all.

For me just existing causes me to suffer, I find it so immensley dreadful and hopeless to exist as a conscious being destined for nothing but to decay. I'm so tired of being burdened with this existence, I'm so tired of the same thoughts, I'll always find existing to be tiring and painful but as well as that I have so much fear for what lies ahead. It terrifies me how there is no limit as to how much one can be tormented in this existence that was very futile and undesirable in the first place. My suffering comes from the fact I exist and all I wish for is an eternal release from it, only in non-existence can I be safe from all suffering and to never suffer again is all I wish for.

 

[FuneralCry]

Death will come eventually.
Regardless of what happens death will come eventually no matter what where this futile, torturous and painful existence will disappear into nothingness with all finally forgotten about, I only find comfort in death and only wish to not exist. For me personally existence is the problem with ceasing to exist being the solution, only death can solve everything for me and bring me peace from all pointless suffering.

Existing truly is just a process of slowly dying and just waiting around to die, it's meaningless pain all for no reason and no purpose and what I find so sad is how I had to suffer in this existence that was completely unnecessary in the first place, the tragedy for me lies in how I even existed, more than anything I wish I never existed.

I wish I stayed eternally unaware of all the endless torment and harm this existence so tragically causes, it's truly so terrible and devastating how I cannot have the option of a death like never waking again especially as death is all that's inevitable, so sad how the focus is on trapping humans in their futile existences until they die anyway, I really wish there's acceptance towards not wanting to prolong suffering.

 

[FuneralCry]

It'll always be sad to exist.
No matter what it'll always be so sad to suffer in this cruel and hopeless existence. I'd always prefer to sleep eternally but I really wish I could just erase this existence so it's like I never existed at all, I don't belong in this reality filled with endless suffering and it terrifies me how there is no limit as to how much one can suffer as long as they exist. Only death can bring me peace from the sadness of existing, to me existence was never worth having in the first place, having the ability to exist only ever caused me pain.

I only hope and wish for nothingness as only then will I be unable to hurt, it's truly so sad how there's all this suffering and cruelty, for me the problem will always lie in existence itself, I see existence as such a terrible, tragic mistake, there's so much sadness in the torment of existing as a conscious being, I know that no matter what I'd never be meant for this existence and I'd be relieved to know that I'd never suffer again.

 

[FuneralCry]

Existence just causes immense harm.
It truly does and it's so terrible and horrific how existence causes all this harm with existing beings forced here just to suffer so senselessly in an reality where there is no limit as to how much agony they can feel. It's so tragic how existing beings are tormented every second, the amount of suffering in this world will always be beyond comprehension.

For me it's so harmful to simply exist, I find it harmful to exist as a conscious being destined for nothing but to decay and deteriorate in this existence that is so immensely cruel. I suffer simply from existing, just being conscious and aware is something so terrible and sad to me, there's so much sadness in being burdened with the ability to suffer to unlimited extents and feel so much hurt. Only in non-existence will I be safe from all harm, I only fear what lies ahead, it terrifies me how this harmful existence could continue for so long, no matter what I'll always find it torturous to exist and more than anything I wish I never existed at all, existence truly does cause nothing but harm.

 

[FuneralCry]

So terrible the absence of painless method.
It's so cruel and so devastating how I cannot just have the option to painlessly die, I wish that I have the ability to fall asleep eternally when I wish to as I'm so tired of suffering, existing truly has caused me nothing but pain, it's so horrible how if one wishes to simply die then that's not allowed and instead they have to suffer and struggle.

All I wish for is to never wake again, I just wish to sleep, I wish to be at peace for all eternity where nothing can matter to me, all I want is to never experience anything again.

Being conscious and aware of this existence truly does just lead to way more suffering and torment which is why it's so terrible how there is the absence of a painless method. I wish it's allowed to die painlessly more than anything as it's so sad and painful to exist, it terrifies me how a human can suffer for so long just to be tortured by old age and die anyway, I'd never wish for such, I just want nothingness, it'll always be so terrible how I cannot just painlessly escape from all the suffering.

 

[FuneralCry]

Just another day of wishing to not exist.
No matter what I'll always wish to not exist, for me existence really is too cruel and painful, I only wish for the peace of an dreamless, eternal sleep to bring me relief from an existence that caused nothing but suffering and was just a terrible, tragic mistake in the first place. I'd always and only wish to not exist but of course more than anything I really wish I never suffered in this existence, I wish I never knew about something as harmful and sad as having the ability to exist, I'll always find it sad to suffer in this existence, there's so much sadness in how I cannot just have the option to fall into an dreamless, eternal sleep and just permanently forget about this existence.

All I feel is fear and dread for what lies ahead in this futile, torturous existence that I wish more than anything I never suffered in, I'm always wishing to not exist and for me personally only wanting to die feels right, I'm not meant for the torment of human existence, I'm only meant to be unconscious for all eternity, all that comforts me is the thought of never being able to experience anything again.

 

[FuneralCry]

Tired of suffering in hopeless existence.
I'll always be so tired of suffering in this existence that was completely hopeless and caused nothing but pain in the first place, I see human existence as the most dreadful, torturous burden that I never would have chose, to me it's just something so terrible to exist as a conscious being in this reality filled with endless cruelty and torment.

I'd never wish for the hopeless fate of suffering so pointlessly for decades in this existence that can potentially get so unbearable way beyond how anyone can imagine it to just to die in agony decaying and deteriorating from very old age. I'm just not meant for existing and no matter what I'll always be so tired of it.

Really wish I could just disappear and erase this existence so it's like I never existed at all, non-existence is always preferable to me than all this pointless suffering and senseless cruelty, existing truly has only ever caused me to suffer and I'd never wish to suffer in any way. I'm so tired of existing, I just wish for nothingness, for me the only relief could ever lie in never suffering in this existence again, only non-existence can bring me peace from this existence that was always so hopeless.

 

[FuneralCry]

For me existence is the problem.
In my case no matter what the problem will always lie in existence itself, the fact that I exist is the source of all my suffering and I personally see no value in suffering in this meaningless, pointless existence where there is unlimited potential to feel pain and be tormented.

For me it's so deeply undesirable to have the ability to exist as a conscious being, to me existence is just a terrible tragedy that caused nothing but existing beings to suffer so unnecessarily and I'd never wish to suffer in this existence. For me existence itself is what I see as the problem that only ceasing to exist can solve as only in non-existence will I finally be unable to suffer in any way and to be eternally incapable of suffering is all I wish for.

I just don't see myself as meant for existing and would prefer to not exist no matter what, I see it as a problem how I'm so tragically burdened with human existence, I find it so sad how I suffered in this existence in the first place, there's so much sadness in how I cannot just easily free myself from this existence I never would have chosen that caused me nothing but pain.

 

[ThisGameIsOverrated]

Welcome back FC!

They were gone? I must've missed something

 

[FuneralCry]

The wish for this existence to be erased.
All that'd be ideal for me is to have the option to erase this cruel, painful and torturous existence so it's like I never existed at all, I just want to disappear into nothingness, I wish to never suffer in this existence again, it'd comfort me to know I could just erase all the meaningless suffering this existence has so tragically caused me to experience. I never wish to remember anything rather I just wish for all to be forgotten about.

I only hope for non-existence where all memories of the harm this existence caused are gone, I want nothing to be able to matter to me, I simply wish to not exist, I don't wish to experience anything again especially as such only ever causes me to suffer. Non-existence is all I see as desirable but I really wish I never suffered at all, I want it to be like I never existed more than anything as I never should have existed and it's so terribly tragic how I did, I could never see a benefit to suffering so senselessly in this existence so immensely cruel, no matter what I'd prefer to avoid existence.

 

[FuneralCry]

Wish for painless method.
To me it really would be such an overwhelming relief to have a painless method to free myself from all the endless suffering this existence so tragically causes. I wish for a death like never waking again, I wish to sleep for all eternity and forget about this hopeless, cruel existence that only ever caused me to suffer, all that appeals to me is never suffering again and instead being at true, eternal peace for all eternity.

The fact that I cannot just die in such a way is so painful and devastating, I really wish suicide is accepted rather than the focus being on prologing meaningless torment no matter what and trapping people in existences that just cause them to suffer. I'm so tired of suffering in this existence and I only wish for a painless death to free me from a potentially decades in this reality filled with endless cruelty where there is no limit as to how torturous this existence can get. I'd never wish to exist no matter what, I see nothing desirable about decaying from age just to be tortured in agony from very old age, in fact the thought of such really terrifies me.

 

[FuneralCry]

I only find comfort in death.
Only death comforts me, I only find comfort in death as I believe it to simply be non-existence where one cannot suffer for all eternity. Existence really is so cruel and painful with literally no limit as to how much one can be tormented, I'd always prefer to die as it's the one escape from all this endless suffering. I really hope and wish for nothingness because existence only ever caused me to suffer, all I wish for is to never feel pain again, it's just so terrible how existing beings feel suffer so unbearably.

I wish I just stayed unaware of this horrific tragedy in the first place but since I never had a choice I'm now only wishing for death, I only find comfort in death, all I wish for is an eternal release from all the hurt that existence causes. I'm just not meant to suffer in this existence, I'm not meant for the torment of existing as a human, only death can bring me peace from this existence that only ever hurt me, I'd be so relieved to not exist for all eternity, all that could ever be desirable to me is eternal nothingness.

 

[FuneralCry]

Existing can very easily get much more torturous.
This is what I find so truly terrible and terrifying about existing, is that it can very easily get much more torturous and cause way more unbearable agony and torment, it's horrific how there is no limit as to how much pain an existing being can feel. Honestly this is certainly a reason I'd always prefer to not exist as I fear existing, it terrifies me how one can suffer so unbearably yet there is no option of a straightforward way to just painlessly die, I really just wish to not exist as only then will I be unable to suffer and be hurt in this existence that is so immensely cruel.

For me the problem certainly lies in existence itself, I'll always see it as so hopeless to exist and I find it so tragic how I had to suffer in this existence in the first place, I'd never wish for this existence no matter what, I'm certainly not meant for the torment of existing as a conscious being in this reality filled with endless harm and suffering. It's something I'd prefer to avoid which is why in my case I'd certainly be relieved to finally cease existing as only in death will I be safe from suffering, I only wish for an eternal release from this existence that has only ever caused me to suffer.

 

[FuneralCry]

The hopelessness of existing.
Having the ability to exist will always be so immensely hopeless to me, I personally see no value in suffering so unnecessarily for decades on end, I see no benefit to the torment of existing as a conscious being just to be tortured dying in agony slowly and painfully from old age. No matter what I'd always prefer to not exist than to suffer in this existence that caused nothing but pain and was always so hopeless in the first place, I'll always find it so sad to exist, I wish I could just choose to painlessly die and eternally forget about this existence, I've only ever seen non-existence as desirable as it means I'll finally be unable to suffer in any way.

I'd always prefer the permanency of death to the futility and cruelty of existence, all that comforts me is the thought of never being able to experience anything ever again, I only wish for my hopeless existence that caused nothing but harm that was completely unnecessary in the first place to eternally disappear into nothingness. All that I feel is dread for what lies ahead, it's so terrible and sad to suffer in this existence with the absence of the option to just never wake again.

 

[FuneralCry]

I hope I sleep.
I hope I fall asleep as I just don't want to suffer in any way, I just want nothingness instead, existence really is far too cruel and painful and has only ever caused me to suffer, I'm not meant to exist in this reality filled with endless cruelty and suffering. It's really so sad to exist, there's so much sadness in suffering in this existence, I hope I fall asleep and forget about it all as the pain of existing is endless and very real, I'm so tired, only eternal sleep can take away my tiredness, I really hope to sleep.

 

[FuneralCry]

Only when I'm dead will I be unable to suffer.
No matter what I'll always suffer as long as I'm trapped in this existence, I find it so cruel and painful to exist, I'd never wish for something as harmful as existence. The problem will always lie in existence itself for me, I find it so sad and terrible how I have to suffer in this existence, there's so much sadness in how I've been tormented by this existence that causes nothing but endless cruelty and suffering, only when I'm dead will I be unable to suffer and to never suffer again is all I wish for.

I find it comforting to simply be able to rest for all eternity with this existence permanently forgotten about, all I wish for is to finally be at peace, free from this existence that caused nothing but pain in the first place. Personally I only wish for death, I only wish to be non-existent, nothing would ever make me want to suffer and risk experiencing way worse torment in this existence that was just a terrible mistake in the first place, I'm not meant for existing.

 

[FuneralCry]

Wish it could be like I never existed.
More than anything I wish it could be like I never suffered in this existence at all, I wish this existence could be erased as after all I was never meant to exist, I never should have existed and it's so cruel and terrible how I suffer in this existence.

I only wish for eternal nothingness where all is gone for me, I want it to be so nothing can matter to me, I just want it to be like I never existed, I don't wish to experience anything at all, instead I just wish to be unaware for all eternity.

Existing as a conscious being in this existence I never would have chosen truly has caused me nothing but suffering and no matter what I'd never wish to suffer. I wish I never existed, I'm just not meant for something as painful as existing, I'm not meant for the torturous struggle of human existence. Personally I prefer true peace over pointless suffering and I really wish it could be like I never suffered at all, I'm so tired of existing and no matter what I always will be, I want nothing about this existence that was just a terrible mistake to be remembered, rather I just wish for all to be forgotten about, I find it so sad to suffer so pointlessly in this existence just waiting to die.

 

[FuneralCry]

Existing is painful.
No matter what existing will always be painful to me, I find it painful to be conscious and aware in this existence where there is endless cruelty and suffering. I'd always prefer to not exist but really I wish I never suffered at all, I just find it sad how I had to suffer in this existence in the first place.

To me existence is just a terrible, torturous burden that was completely unnecessary that there was never a need for, the tragedy for me lies in how there is all this suffering I've experienced that could have been prevented by never existing at all. It's tragic how I'm trapped in this painful existence, the fact that existence causes immense amounts of harm with no limit as to how much one can suffer will always be such a horrific tragedy to me.

I know that I'm not meant to suffer in this reality, I'm only meant for the peace of eternal nothingness, I really wish I could just choose to painlessly not exist to free myself from an existence that caused nothing but pain in the first place. I wish for the peace of eternal sleep to stop the hurt existence causes, I know that no matter what I'll always suffer as long as I exist, in fact for me existing is nothing but suffering.

 

[FuneralCry]

The pointlessness of existence.
To me existing truly will always just be pointless suffering and more than anything I wish I never suffered at all, I see existing as the most futile process of slowly dying where one suffers so unnecessarily in this existence that can potentially get so torturous way beyond how anyone can imagine it to just to die slowly and painfully, deteriorating and decaying from old age.

Existing truly does just lead to nothing and nowhere, to me having the ability to exist is such a terrible tragedy. Personally I'd always prefer to not exist to escape from this existence that caused nothing but suffering, I'd prefer to avoid all future harms and torment by ceasing to exist, for me there's no value to suffering so pointlessly in this existence that was completely undesirable.

I wish I could just eternally fall asleep and forget it all, for me existing is just a dreadful, hopeless struggle, it's so sad how I have to suffer in this existence, I find it devastating how there isn't the option for me to just easily die in peace especially as all of this was completely pointless in the first place with there being no disadvantages to me permanently ceasing to exist, I only wish for the eternity of non-existence to escape from the cruelty and futility of existing.

 

[FuneralCry]

So tired of terrible, cruel existence.
No matter what I'll always be so tired of this terrible, cruel existence, I'm so tired of suffering in this existence I never would have chose that I was never meant for. I wish I could just fall asleep eternally and forget about everything, I wish for the peace that only eternal sleep can bring me, I wish for no more painful memories of this existence that only ever harmed me in the first place. For me it truly would be such a relief to be eternally free from the futility and cruelty of existing, I'll always see it as so hopeless to exist, I find it terrible how I suffer and struggle without the option to just painlessly die.

 

[Evelyn Lane]

So tired of terrible, cruel existence.
No matter what I'll always be so tired of this terrible, cruel existence, I'm so tired of suffering in this existence I never would have chose that I was never meant for. I wish I could just fall asleep eternally and forget about everything, I wish for the peace that only eternal sleep can bring me, I wish for no more painful memories of this existence that only ever harmed me in the first place. For me it truly would be such a relief to be eternally free from the futility and cruelty of existing, I'll always see it as so hopeless to exist, I find it terrible how I suffer and struggle without the option to just painlessly die.

What does a day in your life look like? Genuinely curious.

 

[FuneralCry]

Each day is just another day of suffering, another futile day closer to death.
To me existence truly is just a process of slowly dying and waiting around to die, each day being one closer to this existence permanently disappearing into nothingness no matter what. I find it so incredibly tragic how I had to exist in the first place, the tragedy lies in how I had to suffer and be hurt by an existence that there was never a need for and was completely unnecessary, to me existing truly is just meaningless suffering all for no purpose.

I certainly never would have chosen existence and more than anything I wish I never existed at all, I don't see the value in suffering in this existence. In fact I don't wish to experience anything at all, under no circumstances would I wish for the torment of existing as a conscious being and it terrifies me how there is no limit as to how torturous this can get all while one is destined for nothing but to decay and die anyway. Existing truly is so futile, I'd never wish to experience anything at all, all I wish for is to be non-existent where nothing can harm me, only non-existence can bring me peace from these endless days filled with suffering that so tragically repeat.

 

[FuneralCry]

Existence as an imposition.
That is what existence will always be to me, a hopeless harmful imposition that caused nothing but endless suffering and cruelty. It's really so horrific and tragic the amount of harm existence caused, I wish I never existed as only then would I have stayed eternally unable to suffer. I just find it sad how I have to struggle in this futile and painful existence where there is no limit as to how much agony one can feel, there's so much sadness in existing and what I find so so terrible is how there isn't any acceptance towards preferring to not exist with the focus being on prolonging the meaningless suffering humans go through instead.

In my case I only wish to not exist as I'm not meant for the torment of existing as a conscious being, I'm so tired of this imposition and it fills me with so much dread to think of what lies ahead, no matter what I'll always find it so dreadful to exist. I'll always see it so dreadful to be conscious and aware capable of suffering to unlimited extents in an existence that was so meaningless in the first place, existing certainly isn't for me and all I wish for is the option of a painless death so I can finally be at peace.