For women: do you think that if you were a man you’d be a school/mass shooter?

[sserafim]

Yes but not just because we're men and we have more testosterone (we actually have significantly less than the men of 100 years ago. So I don't buy that argument). There's a big culture and upbringing component to it. Men are conditioned to never express any negative emotion, except anger, anger is fine. So if you have fear over going to your first sports game, you can't be scared you have to convert it to angry determination. If you get bullied and feel sad, you shouldn't you have to feel anger towards the bullies and stand up for yourself. Once you reach a certain age you can't talk about anything at all, so all you're left with is anger being the most accessible thing since everything else was forcefully shoved aside by parents, teachers, peers, etc. So when all you have left is anger, yeah you're gonna be more violent. There are sources I can cite if you want.

There's also the expectation that you're supposed to make your own way in life and be a provider and all that nonsense that nobody really believes anymore... or do they? This increases desperation. I've seen stories of young brothers at age 13, 14 who had to take care of older sisters who were adults because it was the expectation. Since they couldn't work legally, they decided to use crime to care for their sisters. That and the idea of anger being the only acceptable feeling are probably the reason that men are the overwhelming prison and homeless population since some don't see a way forward other than to use crime (which can be violent) to make their life.

Just as a bit of an anecdotal example for this part. My sisters married rich men to deal with their financial problems. I don't have that option so I either have to cope hard, be homeless, be a criminal and steal stuff, or somehow find a working-class job that pays a liveable wage.


Usually, the consensus is the opposite lol. I'm curious why you feel like that. I myself don't really have an opinion on the matter since I think that men are better of in some ways, and struggle way more in others, and women are the same.


The latter part was what my mom and sisters always told me. It's time for a change! Everyone should be equally dangerous, no matter their gender.

I heard that it was hard for men to express their feelings or show any weakness. I was confused when I saw threads where men said that they wanted to cry because I thought that men didn't cry. I didn't know that men could feel sad too. I also heard that men with ASD were perceived as creepy

 

[dragonofenvy]

I also heard that men with ASD were perceived as creepy

Idk about others but I was always perceived as such and as "dangerous looking." I was always called school shooter in high school and some people would ask me "hey when you eventually shoot up the school can you make sure you get x person?" Very dumb of them to keep calling someone that consistently since I always think that the more you call/tell someone something the more they become that. And yet people wonder how school shootings happen. Now I try to avoid people as much as possible so as to not threaten or creep them out.

I saw threads where men said they wanted to cry because I thought that men didn't cry

They don't, but they want to. Often they can't even when they want to. Goes back to what I said before about anger being accessible and nothing else. Also a very scary thing to open yourself up to others and then face scorn for it.

 

[R_N]

They don't, but they want to. Often they can't even when they want to. Goes back to what I said before about anger being accessible and nothing else. Also a very scary thing to open yourself up to others and then face scorn for it.

I was very emotional as younger and could cry experiencing anything that touched me. It was usually reserved for when I am alone tho. Through movies, music etc.

And I am a guy.

 

[MrsNobody]

.

Personally, I have a lot of anger and hatred towards the world, capitalism (having to work for a living for the rest of your life just to afford to survive), people and society. I have like a deep-seated hatred and resentment towards them. I think that if I was a guy, then unfortunately, I would be a good candidate for one and probably eventually become one. I guess God was nice to me by making me a woman

The following isn't judging you or others, OP...just my answer. (Just in case this is taken the wrong way.)

I'm a female but what stops me from doing most things are the consequences.

If I were to be a mass shooter, I'd be a moral one. I never understood people who just go shooting random strangers. Mine would be more targeted at people who bullied me, picked on me for no reason and etc.

If I didn't fear jail and consequences and if I were to be a criminal of such a large scale it would more than likely be a serial killer and one with (what I deem) justifications.

I'd get no satisfaction out of shooting random people who I didn't know. If I had gotten to that point, I'd probably just end myself anyways.

 

[DarkThoughts]

I heard that it was hard for men to express their feelings or show any weakness. I was confused when I saw threads where men said they wanted to cry because I thought that men didn't cry. I didn't know that men could feel sad too. I also heard that men with ASD were perceived as creepy

Sorry to post here, but I think some people might appreciate testimonies from men regarding this. (let me know if it's an issue and I can remove the post)

Growing up with ASD, I was relentlessly mocked in school by people saying I'm going to become a mass shooter, or saying I'm a predator. This, being inexplicable to me, started in junior school when I was 10 or 11. It continued into secondary school and worsened as people learned what those things truly meant. I wasn't able to make eye contact and I kept to myself when possible, so I didn't understand why it was happening. I still don't. Boys have generally been taught to become stoic and hide any signs of weakness. Even now, knowing that it's a terrible concept, I still feel strange seeing men cry. It's conditioned into most of us, I believe, and it can feel shameful when we do cry. Feeling like we're not allowed to express our pain breeds significant loneliness and isolation.

I hope this has provided some positive insight. If not, that's okay too.

 

[misthios2040]

I wouldn't be, I just hate myself more than the people around me.. Let them live this shitty existence. I'll take the exit door to where ever it may lead. It's not that I hold anger and resentment towards others, but perhaps its my mindset where i think the problem lies with me and not other people. Perhaps life is shitty for me because i deserve it. The reason why I am old, fat, and dumb is because I don't deserve happiness. I don't deserve love because I am the monster. I get bullied because it is my own fault. i'm the problem, not the people around me. I am the fuck up who deserves nothing more than loneliness and a painful existence where I am never fulfilled. I'll never succeed in obtaining my goals because i am just a desperate loser. This mind set is why I wouldn't be a school shooter. Give me a gun and the first thing I'll do is blow my brains out. I'm the fuck up. I am an ugly fatass. I am disgusting. I am worthless. It's my fault that i was sexually assaulted. its my fault that bad things keep happening. I am nothing.

 

[Proteus]

What's up fed. You ain't fooling anyone.

I am a man, and I never shoot anyone. But I was quiet, and my friends on school joked about me being one lol.

 

[skybox]

I wouldn't want to involve randos and I don't hate anyone enough to make it personal. Fleeting thoughts if any. I've had discussions with my therapist about it and she found it fascinating

 

[sserafim]

What's up fed. You ain't fooling anyone.

I am a man, and I never shoot anyone. But I was quiet, and my friends on school joked about me being one lol.

I'm not a fed lol. I'm just a girl who's kinda sad and suicidal

I wouldn't be, I just hate myself more than the people around me.. Let them live this shitty existence. I'll take the exit door to where ever it may lead. It's not the I hold anger and resentment towards others, but perhaps its my mindset where i think the problem lies with me and not other people. Perhaps life is shitty for me because i deserve it. The reason why I am old, fat, and dumb is because I don't deserve happiness. I don't deserve love because I am the monster. I get bullied because it is my own fault. i'm the problem, not the people around me. I am the fuck up who deserves nothing more than loneliness and a painful existence where I am never fulfilled. I'll never succeed in obtaining my goals because i am just a desperate loser. This mind set is why I wouldn't be a school shooter. Give me a gun and the first thing I'll do is blow my brains out. I'm the fuck up. I am an ugly fatass. I am disgusting. I am worthless. It's my fault that i was sexually assaulted. its my fault that bad things keep happening. I am nothing.

Why is your hatred placed onto/aimed at yourself rather than other people?

 

[misthios2040]

I'm not a fed lol. I'm just a girl who's kinda sad and suicidal

Why is your hatred placed onto/aimed at yourself rather than other people?

I think from a lifetime of observation I've proven to myself time and time again that I am not a capable human being. The only answer for why bad things happen is that perhaps it is my fault. My whole life has been a terrible hand of cards one after another. I see how other people are more successful and happy and I'm thinking maybe I'm just too stupid to understand that people do not like me because I'm just a dumbass and a loser.

 

[druggedonsurvival]

I think you have a rather prejudiced view of men but it is not entirely wrong. Yes, men tend to be more violent but I think that has more to do with gender norms and upbringing. Personally, I hate guns and I hate violence and I don't think I could ever bring myself to hurt another person if I tried. I hate the human condition but I don't really hate humanity. I agree that capitalism sucks though.

If you think you would be a shooter as a man, it probably says more about you than it says anything about men. I will say though that there is something to the idea that men have a harder time expressing and processing their emotions. There have been many times when I wanted to cry or I felt I should but I just couldn't (though it seems to be easier these days). I think we just suppress them automatically whether or not we want to.

 

[sserafim]

I think you have a rather prejudiced view of men but it is not entirely wrong. Yes, men tend to be more violent but I think that has more to do with gender norms and upbringing. Personally, I hate guns and I hate violence and I don't think I could ever bring myself to hurt another person if I tried. I hate the human condition but I don't really hate humanity. I agree that capitalism sucks though.

If you think you would be a shooter as a man, it probably says more about you than it says anything about men. I will say though that there is something to the idea that men have a harder time expressing and processing their emotions. There have been many times when I wanted to cry or I felt I should but I just couldn't (though it seems to be easier these days). I think we just suppress them automatically whether or not we want to.

I think I would be an incel as a man

 

[dragonofenvy]

I think I would be an incel as a man

Why's that?

 

[sserafim]

Why's that?

Asperger's, Asian, etc.

 

[Pluto]

 

[Forever Sleep]

No. I have more anger towards mass shooters. I've in fact just watched a horrific documentary on a mass shooting in a Mc Donalds. It was heart breaking.

I just don't understand the mentality either. A crime of passion- maybe. If you have real cause to be that angry at an individual. But- these are more- I don't like the world and a handful of people have been mean to me so I'm just going to indiscriminantly kill a whole bunch of people. In this case, this included children, babies, parents, elderly- the lot. Honestly- no- I tend to have more violent fantasies of what I'd do to someone I saw randomly attacking children. Although- I have a horrible feeling fear would stop me.

Of course- I feel awful for people who are bullied. I expect most people here have experienced that but- fighting back even physically seems a more appropriate response to shooting them.

 

[Proteus]

fighting back even physically seems a more appropriate response to shooting them.

What do you really expect? Bullies are dirty and usually more numerous, and the victims they go for aren't the strongest either... Do you expect them to just "fight back"? And do you think they would be bullied in first place if they could? Lol, I wonder how many people would react in this situation. Not saying it's a good outcome, but saying victims should have to endure anything if it reduces suffering will never work from a mental perspective. Negative utilitarianism is completely flawed and inapplicable to the real world.

If you dislike shooters so much (comprehensible, don't get me wrong), direct all your anger to whoever causes them in first place. This is the same as suicide: identify the causes and stop them instead of expecting people to just suck it up.

Edit, I am talking about the bullies, not innocent people. I definitely don't understand the reasoning behind going for people who did nothing.

 

[Forever Sleep]

What do you really expect? Bullies are dirty and usually more numerous, and the victims they go for aren't the strongest either... Do you expect them to just "fight back"? And do you think they would be bullied in first place if they could? Lol, I wonder how many people would react in this situation. Not saying it's a good outcome, but saying victims should have to endure anything if it reduces suffering will never work from a mental perspective. Negative utilitarianism is completely flawed and inapplicable to the real world.

If you dislike shooters so much (comprehensible, don't get me wrong), direct all your anger to whoever causes them in first place. This is the same as suicide: identify the causes and stop them instead of expecting people to just suck it up.

Correct me if I'm wrong but shooters don't tend to just target the people who were mean to them. They go on a blood drunk killing spree. Of course I don't support that! That girl looked at me weirdly- she made me feel bad about myself- she deserves to be shot in the face. Are you sure that all their reasoning is justified? I'm not saying some isn't but- can you be sure they were reasonable? Especially when they start firing into a crowd. That's targetting everyone. The good and the bad.

Sure, I understand the frustration but I don't think the whole- this world is shit, so I'm just going to add to the horror really helps either. But- of course I'm angry with the people who bullied them- if they were in fact targetted so ruthlessly.

The documentary I mentioned above was the San Ysidro McDonalds masacre. It seems like he didn't like immigrants, so he shot 21 people including babies and children and wounded 19 others. Of course- there were failures there. He tried to get through to some kind of mental healthcare line and couldn't. But still- isn't it also possible that the shooters mind has become paranoid and distorted?

I'm not saying people should 'just take it' at all. In fact- I really enjoy watching this YouTube video from time to time... Even though I probably shouldn't...



But- I was bullied at times. Most people here probably have been. But no- personally, I consider killing 30 random students is excessive force in retaliation for being bullied. But- no- I have no problem with someone fighting back- at all. But, I take your point- not everyone can.

And yes- obviously it would be better if children were taught not to bully one another to begin with. Do they deserve to be shot though along with a bunch of other innocent people to make a point? I'd say no. Have you always been nice to people? As a child- were you always nice? Would it have been reasonable if the child you weren't so nice to once pulled out a revolver and shot you? Would they have been justified? Would your parents have forgiven them?

 

[girlsboysthems]

probably yeah.

 

[Proteus]

Correct me if I'm wrong but shooters don't tend to just target the people who were mean to them. They go on a blood drunk killing spree. Of course I don't support that! That girl looked at me weirdly- she made me feel bad about myself- she deserves to be shot in the face. Are you sure that all their reasoning is justified? I'm not saying some isn't but- can you be sure they were reasonable? Especially when they start firing into a crowd. That's targetting everyone. The good and the bad.

No, you are 100% correct here. People who pay their frustrations with others are bad. What I meant is victims of bullying also can't really do anything, and I saw the post as just focused on the bullies, who, to be fair, I don't have much empathy for, either. I really hope you don't think I'm a shootings supporter lol.

 

[SexyIncél]

Women can be badass fighters. Like this one from Rojava, where they destroy sex-slaving Daesh fascists & such

 

[FujoshiNeet]

Nah. I always say I would be a terrible person if I was a guy. I just don't think I would be so awful I would take people from others? Maybe my opinion is skewed from working in schools and with kids in general. They def don't deserve that. They have their own struggles already.

 

[WhiteRabbit]

No. I'm pretty mentally stable. Well, except for the wanting to die part I guess. I'm not angry at anything but my failing body.

 

[Forever Sleep]

No, you are 100% correct here. People who pay their frustrations with others are bad. What I meant is victims of bullying also can't really do anything, and I saw the post as just focused on the bullies, who, to be fair, I don't have much empathy for, either. I really hope you don't think I'm a shootings supporter lol.

You have a fair point and- I agree. Our aim as a society should be to stop people feeling so ostracised and bullied that they become shooters or terrorists to begin with.

I wouldn't say my 'natural' reaction to hate them is good either. It just buys in to more violence- retaliation, leading to more violence and retaliation. It was just an honest response though I guess. I lived nearer London when there were those terrorist attacks on the tube- following 9/11. My Dad worked in London and so did many of my friends. He was actually on a train underground when one of them went off. They were held at a signal for ages. If he had been hurt or killed or, any of my friends had been and I'd had one of the terrorists in front of me- I think hate would take over. If fear or shock didn't that is.

I actually admire people who say they wouldn't hurt another person under any circumstances but, I'm not so sure I wouldn't. Again though- maybe they had cause. What if their home was bombed and civilians were considered justifiable collateral damage? That's terrible. I think I'd find that hard to remember in the heat of the moment though. But- I just think that's the problem with our species in general- we- or at least many of us are quick to hate.

 

[Ambivalent1]

This thread glows lol. On 4chan, a thread is said to glow if the poster sounds like a Fed. I haven't gone to that site in awhile. I liked /pol and /r9k and /lit.

 

[sserafim]

This thread glows lol. On 4chan, a thread is said to glow if the poster sounds like a Fed. I haven't gone to that site in awhile. I liked /pol and /r9k and /lit.

Lol what? Do I sound like a fed to you? I heard that 4chan was for incels

 

[Ambivalent1]

Lol what? Do I sound like a fed to you? I heard that 4chan was for incels

Idk lol
Go to /r9k on 4chan. It's incel paradise. Lol

 

[sserafim]

Idk lol
Go to /r9k on 4chan. It's incel paradise. Lol

No thanks, I'd rather be where the incels aren't

 

[Ambivalent1]

No thanks, I'd rather not be where the incels are. I'd rather stay as far away from them as possible

But their posts are funny. Go to r/niceguys on Reddit. It's funny

 

[sserafim]

But their posts are funny. Go to r/niceguys on Reddit. It's funny

Lol

This thread glows lol. On 4chan, a thread is said to glow if the poster sounds like a Fed. I haven't gone to that site in awhile. I liked /pol and /r9k and /lit.

Do you like y2k too?