Final night with life as it is- one way or another

[TAW122]

I'm sorry that you are suffering immensely and are looking for a way out. I hope whatever happens doesn't end up making your predicament worse, or if you are in recovery that things improve or at least become more tolerable for your circumstances.

 

[Fangarina]

I have been away all day, and my heart dropped when I seen when you were last online after taking it.
I'm glad you called for help, and I really hope the system do not fail you over again after everything you have endured.
Your story is so complex, and I wish there was a way to turn this around for you so you find the happiness you deserve and desire more than anything.
I'm sorry you have been failed and I am sorry you are hurting.
I know you have been offline for a while again, but please let us know how you are when you are able to.

 

[opheliaoveragain]

I have been away all day, and my heart dropped when I seen when you were last online after taking it.
I'm glad you called for help, and I really hope the system do not fail you over again after everything you have endured.
Your story is so complex, and I wish there was a way to turn this around for you so you find the happiness you deserve and desire more than anything.
I'm sorry you have been failed and I am sorry you are hurting.
I know you have been offline for a while again, but please let us know how you are when you are able to.

echoing this. hate how late I am. you're in my thoughts. I really fucking hope they don't fuck it up this time re medical professionals. will be looking out for you.

 

[nir]

echoing this. hate how late I am. you're in my thoughts. I really fucking hope they don't fuck it up this time re medical professionals. will be looking out for you.

I feel the exact same way. I hope they finally get the help they deserve.

 

[imsotired35]

Still hasn't been online since.

 

[NoPoint2Life]

I doubt they have access to their phone and may not for a long time. As happy as I am for them, we've been on this journey with her for so long that it's really hard not to know how everything turned out. But it's the nature of this site anyway.

 

[imsotired35]

I hope we hear from them at some point

 

[nir]

I hope we hear from them at some point

I have a feeling they're probably being held in a psych ward. I reallyyy hope they get treated well. They deserve to feel better.

 

[lachrymost]

Thinking of you, willitpass. I have such little faith in the mental health system--you know how it is--but I hope you are getting the most empathetic care possible.

 

[opheliaoveragain]

Thinking of you, WiP. Hoping they are doing right by you. Hoping you are okay as can be.

 

[fvckfamily]

She died?

 

[no.one]

Thinking of you! i hope you're safe and being well taken care of

 

[ctb2soble]

I'm fairly new here, but I have seen your other posts and I really hope you got a good, empathetic medical team looking after you. It sucks seeing how much you've suffered and continued to suffer. Despite my distrust of the mental health industry, I sincerely hope this is the beginning to a better future for you.

 

[astr4]

i've been holding space for you in my thoughts today. i'm sure this is projection but i identify so much with you and a small part of me is rooting for you. i'm selfishly glad you got help. at the same time i hate how much you've been suffering and i wish there was some end to it.

 

[CatLvr]

I check on you every day, hoping to see something. I just want you to have peace. No one should have to suffer like you have. Know you are in my thoughts.

 

[stilhavinightmares]

I check on you every day, hoping to see something. I just want you to have peace. No one should have to suffer like you have. Know you are in my thoughts.

I do too. I imagine she's healing. I hope that's the case.

 

[deadbehindtheeyes12]

Sorry to hijack this but how do I make a post?

 

[wren-briar]

Sorry to hijack this but how do I make a post?

"Post Thread" button on homepage.

 

[JustAStory]

in the last couple of months I'm working relentlessly on my recovery.
I rarely read threads in this section because I'm afraid they could reawaken something I'm trying to keep at bay.
But almost every day I check on you. Your story moved me the most of everything I've seen here, and I hope you can be well

 

[rozeske]

I hope they are doing right by you this time around. Keeping you in my thoughts

 

[NoPoint2Life]

You are in my thoughts too. Hoping you will be setting out on a new journey towards recovery.

 

[CatLvr]

Hey, sweetie!! @willitpass just checking on you, kiddo! Hope you are feeling a bit better and the folks who are taking care of you love you like we do. Holler when you can!!

 

[opheliaoveragain]

I've kept you in my thoughts this past week etc. I hope they are doing right by you. We're here for you <3

 

[vanillamilkshakes]

Hope you are doing okay, your in my thoughts

 

[CatLvr]

Just visiting your thread today because I miss you. I hope and pray you are doing well and are feeling a better about life, in general. Know you are still in my thoughts daily, and I am hoping the hospital is treating you well.

 

[stilhavinightmares]

Just visiting your thread today because I miss you. I hope and pray you are doing well and are feeling a better about life, in general. Know you are still in my thoughts daily, and I am hoping the hospital is treating you well.

I am seconding this! I keep wanting to hear how she is feeling! I have so much hope for her.

 

[willitpass]

What a joke to think I could be helped. At least this stay wasn't nearly as traumatic as past stays.

 

[rozeske]

What a joke to think I could be helped. At least this stay wasn't nearly as traumatic as past stays.

Hey! You're back! How've you been? I hope you're better, even a bit.

 

[willitpass]

Hey! You're back! How've you been? I hope you're better, even a bit.

My moment to moment mood has stabilized as far as not feeling like I'm constantly on the verge of an emotional explosion. I think that has been from not being able to self harm with the pain killers and laxatives while in the hospital. I think the physical toll of that was impacting me mentally more than I realized. Ultimately though, I still had a very strong desire to CTB. I still want to self harm, if I could I would, but I'm currently on my way to another hospital so that won't be an option anytime soon. And I still believe I will ultimately CTB, most likely setting myself on fire. I just can't see a world where I'm not plagued by my own mind.