Venting Feeling bad over a friend

[wtg]

So, I have this one friend, and old friend. He is the one person that I always compared myself with and he is way way way above me in every aspects. But the thing is, he cared about me. He helped me a lot to get me where I am right now and every times I fail at something, it feels like that I disappoint him. And yeah, I failed so many times, I am failure basically. It hurts me thinking how disappointed he is by seeing the state of me I am currently in. Of course, I am good at hiding it, but still I feel really bad.