Does this site benefit you in any way?

[Nanako]

Being able to chat freely about suicide with other people is very important to me as it greatly eases my anxiety; it makes me feel less isolated.

 

[GreenGlassDoor]

This site has given me a community i can connect with on a deeper level, without having to worry about being patronized or preached to. Its also saved me a lot of pain by helping realize my chosen method was dangerous and ineffective. So i've avoided some serious bullets because of this website. I wish people would actually look at the good this site does instead of just seeing the word "suicide" and immediately wanting to shut it down.(I know its more complicated but it certainly feels that way doesn't it.) I love you guys

 

[fafnir_lol]

This site helped me find a peaceful method to go out if I need to. My life is a constant 1 step forward two steps back.

 

[atpeace2024]

I'm chronically ill and in a lot of daily pain. This site helped me acquire a peaceful method to exit this life if and when I choose to do so, and for that I'm than

What method did you go with?

 

[WhiteRabbit]

What method did you go with?

Nebutal

 

[Shrike]

This feels like the tribe of lost hope and shattered dreams.

Such a beautiful way to put it.

 

[shatteredspine]

At first glance, I was appalled by it's existence. I didn't see it for what it was until I started delving into the forums and witnessed the sense of community. But, i explored my own internal biases and reminded myself of the sense of loneliness I've experienced. I saw that they provided spaces for recovery and supports on both sides of the fence.

Despite the fact that we have mental health days and people screaming from the rooftops about all of the supports that are available...

Most of those people haven't been through the mental health system. They haven't experienced the relentless waitlists. They haven't sat in front of a cold, unsympathetic psychiatrist that brushes off your words, your pleas, your tears, your experiences. They haven't hadn't their motives questioned by doctors or their dignity taken from them during 72 hour holds, limited medication supplies and judgemental pharmacists.

I was on a year long waitlist at the point when I made my most detrimental attempt. Only days before, they told me it could be a number of months until I'd see the psychiatrist when I called them. Of course they rushed me in when it was too late.

When you are out of options, you've settled on your decision, you're unwavering and won't be talked out of it... It is the loneliest, most frustrating existence. Every time you express yourself, attempt to explain yourself you are usually met with one of a number of options...
• A Psychiatric Hold
• An Emotional Argument
• A List of Unresourceful Resources
• More Pain

If you're a loved one affected by suicide please consider that it takes a great deal of pain to bring someone here. This website is not necessary in order to find resources to take your life; there are endless alternative options online for methods or support to do it. What I've found in this website is a sense of community I have yet to experience before. It's given me such relief.


This website, this community is allowing me to have someone there at the end. Regardless of your feelings, this is going to/ did happen. Would you prefer that we spent our final days, our final moments experiencing a complete sense of loneliness.

 

[Aim]

Not really :p just joking! In case of methods. I would have to say yes.

 

[sanction]

This site truly helped me a lot, in 2 important ways

It allowed me to understand the different methods and risks of CTB. Before coming to this forum, I would of easily been naive and thought many methods of CTB was simple and straight forward, leading to potential risk of long-term damage or being disabled if done incorrectly. Now I am much more aware and cautious

It is also the last place I can come to rant and vent, and also hear about other people's similar stories, to feel less alone and feel some meaningful connection, since we're experiencing similar things. Also to validate I am not crazy to think in certain ways, simply because society brainwashes us to only obey their ways of thinking

After being on this forum a few years, I don't know what I'd do without this community. I am very grateful for it

 

[ReadyOrNot?]

Yes. It's good to know there're people who feel the same. And have some place to speak my mind

 

[Zaphkiel]

Thank you Rain for posting this, takes a great deal of courage i think.

It's a safe haven, so the answer is obvious.
People trying to fight against suicide are _not_ suicidal and alienate us on top of that...how can they do something?

As weird as it seems...Not feeling alone in our suffering helps...trying to comfort the others in return helps too...that's a whole grand thing in here where every act allow the next to happens, in some sort of virtuous circle.
Even if we take a step up and goes into methods territory, a lot of people here got their method, prepared it, but never did it...because the fact alone of knowing to have an exit door allowed them to feel secure and get another try at life.
On the grimmest side of it, those who succeeded because of / thank to this site were allowed to pass without failing and thus being a vegetable / suffering for eternity wich is the WORST could happens for everyone (the suicidee - his relatives, friends, etc)...who would wish that. Yeah, i'm talking extremes here, but that"s how life is : extreme.

 

[Akiratendo]

I'm new here. I hope I can get tips and ideas from the users of this site.
The fact that our goal is the same makes me feel good in this site.

 

[hermestrimegistus]

This forum helps me because I would've had a serious attempt very recently without it. This website makes me hyperaware of all the ways I could have easily fucked it all up and survived. Ironically SaSu is keeping me alive. So yeah I guess in a way its technically helping. Just not in the way I would like it to. It's informative to say the least. Also makes me realize I'm not alone in a lot of ways. Especially the incels on here haha. Makes me feel better about being a femcel

 

[countdowntoecstasy]

I made an account literally because this site was benefiting me

 

[Walpurgisnacht]

People here actually understand my life-long suffering, which - whether I like it or not is a part of who I am. I have found a peace in that that I didn't think was possible, I didn't know there were so many other people that I could understand intrinsically like this either.

I have made transient and lasting connections with people here on a very deep emotional level and even though I can't be around often right now I consider it a vital part of my support structure.

I'm sick of being spoken over by these abusive medical pieces of trash, I'm sick of being denied autonomy, summarily detained, assaulted, publicly humiliated by people who refuse to grant me even the most basic human dignity.

People deserve community, including us.
Especially us, really. Considering how we're targeted by the police, for involuntary hospitalisation, with abusive conversion therapy, and discriminated against in basically every stage and aspect of life.

Suicidal people are so marginalised I haven't seen our voices represented anywhere that other people talk about us. Not even a token one time has any of these so-called "experts" actually listened to a suicidal person.
In a civilised society, a huge dude walking up to a random girl on the street and just picking her up and carrying her away without her consent would be rightly considered violating, creepy, and unacceptable behaviour; right? Interrupting my suicide like this instead gets him called a fucking hero.
We're treated like children by society at best, and no one even stops to question if maybe grown ass men just... shouldn't grab random girls at all.

We don't just deserve community imo, we need it. This place has provided peace and closure for people who otherwise would've never been given that before their death.
Even for the pro-lifer's perspective: I have seen so many people come here when they had nothing, being treated like trash by these mental health and suicide "experts", and got just enough of a safety net and support structure in their lives to have the emotional equity to re-evaluate their decision, because everyone here takes their right to make it seriously and with respect.
It's good to see people recover in my opinion, I don't think life itself has inherent value, but in my ideal world everyone would have a reason to value their own. It makes me happy when I see people leave this forum because they end up actually liking living; no one wants to suffer, it's just a fact of the awful human experience. If they hadn't had this community, and were instead involuntarily hospitalised and forced to go through long, traumatic, invasive, and violating "treatment", I wonder if they would've had the emotional equity to think about it critically in the end; I doubt it.

Suicidal people being so isolated from anyone who has the potential to understand us -- and not demean or infantilise us, to treat us with some fucking dignity and respect -- is as harmful to us than any one of these other forced measures to keep us surviving no matter what that these "experts" enforce. Measures that just axiomatically assume life has some intrinsic objective value beyond what the person who's life it is judges that value to be, just because their own has value to them and they are willfully ignorant of any other perspective.
They just care about numbers, statistics, not the human beings being hurt by their shit.

TL;DR: This site benefits me a lot. It filled a vital hole in my support structure, I have met a lot of interesting people here, even someone I now consider a very close friend, and I fucking hate the arrogance of these self-righteous pro-lifers who think they are entitled to decide how our lives play out on their moral crusade to forcefully deny us any autonomy, community, respect, or just basic human decency.

Thank you for keeping this place around Rain, I don't imagine it's easy for you at all.

 

[buyersremorse]

beyond words. this site is my sanctuary.

 

[morgueprincess]

everywhere i go, there are people who think suicide is cowardly. being here has made me realize i was never truly alone, and having a whole community of people who feel the same as i do really helps. without this site i think i would have lived the rest of my life with no way out, dreading every moment, having no way of relief.

 

[DaysOfTomorrow]

You're asking me to put what happened in the last 15 years of my life into a few sentences.
I swear I tried for a couple of hours, but it's impossible.

Long story short, this website made me realize that I'm not ready and I don't really mean it, therefore it greatly improved my life.

That's the best way that I can explain the events of the past 15 years of my life.
Thank you for providing the support, specially that it's free of any charge.

 

[IonicLemon69]

I lurked on this website for quite a few months before making an account. I find it to be very comforting knowing other people feel the same way I do. I like watching people interact & enjoy the sense of community here.

 

[eunoia]

I do genuinely find the mere existence of this website so so comforting. I have a very different and some would argue wrong and unhealthy way of thinking & seeing the world. I am open about it and I rarely almost never get support or any sort of understanding. That alone discourages me enough to not believe in anything honestly. I hate people, I hate life. So being able to have a place where I can express myself and be supported or at least understood- and see others feel the same way or alike, keeps me sane. Just a little bit sane. Enough for me to believe and have hope and faith that I can have the life I so badly want and very much deserve, because I'm not the only person on Earth who suffers the way I do.

I have absolutely zero knowledge on how SanctionedSuicide came to be. I am just seriously happy to be here.

 

[why am i alive?]

The site helps me cope with my Depression and express Feelings. It helps to know that there's a way out.

 

[odradek]

The idea that this site could benefit people or the idea it could harm people are not mutually exclusive concepts. This simple distinction should be obvious. Denial of this fact seems at best uncritcal and at worst disingenuous.

I think this unnuanced poll being so laughably one sided undermines any point trying to be made here. It is not suprising people on the outside don't take this place seriously. I'm not saying it's fair, but definitely not suprising. Saying there is no potential benefit to this forum is as untrue as saying there is no potential harm.

 

[DecisionToLeave]

This website is very helpful to me. I often read threads about partial hanging. I am from China, where online discussions about suicide are heavily banned and we do not have any chance to find useful information of suicide. However, on this website, I have found many people in the same situation like me, and we comfort each other, it is heartwarming.
I am not a native speaker, there may be issues in my expression, please forgive me.

 

[Shrike]

The idea that this site could benefit people or the idea it could harm people are not mutually exclusive concepts. This simple distinction should be obvious. Denial of this fact seems at best uncritcal and at worst disingenuous.

Saying there is no potential benefit to this forum is as untrue as saying there is no potential harm.

The OP is a response to the specific claim of "there is no value to this site, it doesn't benefit anyone".

 

[Maybeunlucky]

New here. Struggling with incureable contagious disease and the only thing I find comfort in would be to have some kind of substance available to me that I can exit my life with whenever I want.

I find that the site is really hard to navigate though and finding what I really want to research or getting my questions answered seems hard.

 

[Ambivalent1]

Companionship

Real conversations about a topic most people won't discuss out of cowardice and refusal to acknowledge

 

[doormat25]

Motivates me.

 

[RainAndSadness]

The idea that this site could benefit people or the idea it could harm people are not mutually exclusive concepts. This simple distinction should be obvious. Denial of this fact seems at best uncritcal and at worst disingenuous.

I think this unnuanced poll being so laughably one sided undermines any point trying to be made here. It is not suprising people on the outside don't take this place seriously. I'm not saying it's fair, but definitely not suprising. Saying there is no potential benefit to this forum is as untrue as saying there is no potential harm.

You should read my opening post again before you post anything, tbh. This thread is a response to someone saying that this forum doesn't benefit anyone, which is very obviously a demonstrably false statement and since the media doesn't do it's job and fact-check these claims because claims like these fit perfectly into the narrative that this is a useless, horrible and toxic forum, I took it upon me to do the job for the media, to prove this forum does actually benefit people. It's not the poll that's bad faith, it's the people portraying this forum in a very one-sided manner, like even if you disagree with this forum on principle, there is no reason to pretend that there aren't people out there - and according to this poll it's a vast majority of members - who appreciate this forum. And look, I even made the poll anonymous to encourage no-votes, okay. So don't come at me with "uncritical and at worst distingenous" because that's your post. You didn't even understand why I made this thread but thanks for spouting your ignorant opinion here, great. But hey, since you're so smart, maybe you tell me how I'm supposed to counter obviously false claims in these articles if not with a poll. Educate me, odradek. Tell me how I'm supposed to debunk these bad-faith arguments.

If the media did their job, I wouldn't have to run these polls myself. And it's funny because these journalists have accounts here. I know it, okay. And the problem is, they're not using these accounts to try to understand why this forum exists and why there is a demand for a place like this one. And that's a problem.

 

[odradek]

You should read my opening post again before you post anything, tbh. This thread is a response to someone saying that this forum doesn't benefit anyone, which is very obviously a demonstrably false statement and since the media doesn't do it's job and fact-check these claims because claims like these fit perfectly into the narrative that this is a useless, horrible and toxic forum, I took it upon me to do the job for the media, to prove this forum does actually benefit people. It's not the poll that's bad faith, it's the people portraying this forum in a very one-sided manner, like even if you disagree with this forum on principle, there is no reason to pretend that there aren't people out there - and according to this poll it's a vast majority of members - who appreciate this forum. And look, I even made the poll anonymous to encourage no-votes, okay. So don't come at me with "uncritical and at worst distingenous" because that's your post. You didn't even understand why I made this thread but thanks for spouting your ignorant opinion here, great. But hey, since you're so smart, maybe you tell me how I'm supposed to counter obviously false claims in these articles if not with a poll. Educate me, odradek. Tell me how I'm supposed to debunk these bad-faith arguments.

If the media did their job, I wouldn't have to run these polls myself. And it's funny because these journalists have accounts here. I know it, okay. And the problem is, they're not using these accounts to try to understand why this forum exists and why there is a demand for a place like this one. And that's a problem.

I felt the poll was too binary and it undermined what I thought was the purpose of this thread: to contrast the benefits of the forum against the bleak mental health reality paired with uncaring governments and media. Our late stage capitalist reality. I misunderstood this thread.

The purpose of the poll and thread was actually to debunk this medical official and counter with the benefits of the forum because of the media attention. I didn't mean to come off like I was attacking this site or its community and totally miss the point. But I did, and that's my fault, I'll admit it. I'm sorry. I used aggressive language and unempathetically communicated my wrong point also.

I'd like to think I'm a part of this community. I don't know where the constructive discussion can be had here tbh. That's a failing on me. I just get frustrated at how black and white discussion can be at times here and I guess I don't help on that front much either.

I feel like trying to debunk our most bad faith or ignorant critics undermines our argument and makes us look more extreme than we are. Maybe I'm wrong about that, I definitely haven't thought about it enough, so maybe I should do that. This wasn't the place for this opinion, I see that now.

We have the better argument, I agree. There's a lot of nuance in that opinion for me, which includes criticisms. I guess I don't know how to properly express this yet. I don't know, I'm not trying to be an activist or anything so my opinion should be taken with a massive grave of salt. I have been uncritical. I'll think more, talk less.

 

[Valky]

It really helps knowing that I am not alone with my problems and that others feel the same. As someone always trying to 'fix' people/situations (due to family background) it is very uplifting being able to do so and getting the feeling of bringing others comfort and a clearer point of view on their situations.
The site also is some kind of safety net for me, knowing that I can still always come back and vent, without being judged, if I need to. :)