Venting does thinking about suicide make you feel happier?

[3spiral]

maybe not if you're deeply depressed, but thinking about suicide makes me want to live more. not in the sense of living for longer but actually getting a life you know? idk like just living as if I was meant to do so
thinking that I might die young makes me feel sort of melancholic, makes me feel the need to say goodbye to everything but it also makes me feel like I can do anything and nothing matters because I will die anyway. I don't think I was ever meant to live for so long, I don't think I actually need to plan for a life. even as a kid I thought it wasn't worth living through adulthood
my life wasn't that sad at all or something I just think I have no purpose anymore, and I want to be able to live as if I had nothing to lose. why can't I just leave peacefully in a couple of years

 

[Rihan]

I feel at peace when I think about taking my own life. I'd rather die young than grow old. I also don't think I am meant to live long. Why should I strive for a longer life when its quality would be horrible no matter what? That's how I think.

 

[tooafraidtodiez]

maybe not if you're deeply depressed, but thinking about suicide makes me want to live more. not in the sense of living for longer but actually getting a life you know? idk like just living as if I was meant to do so
thinking that I might die young makes me feel sort of melancholic, makes me feel the need to say goodbye to everything but it also makes me feel like I can do anything and nothing matters because I will die anyway. I don't think I was ever meant to live for so long, I don't think I actually need to plan for a life. even as a kid I thought it wasn't worth living through adulthood
my life wasn't that sad at all or something I just think I have no purpose anymore, and I want to be able to live as if I had nothing to lose. why can't I just leave peacefully in a couple of years

I feel nervous and lethargic whenever I'm thinking about ending it all. I hope that if someone ever think of ending it all and their problem is managable they consider keep on going

 

[3spiral]

I feel nervous and lethargic whenever I'm thinking about ending it all. I hope that if someone ever think of ending it all and their problem is managable they consider keep on going

why tho? my problems are probably really manageable I'm just dramatic and don't see the point of living for that long and that's totally enough for me. and if you feel so awful in life then why would you be scared? is the nothingness of death worse than this? I don't want to sound insensitive though, whatever you feel is valid I'm just saying it from my pov of course

maybe humans aren't even supposed to live that long you know? and I also just feel a little bit worthless of my own life. I'm much worse than everyone else, I feel much less real. I don't see why I wouldn't feel satisfaction on thinking leaving things behind. I just feel bad about my parents

 

[synthsong]

It has made me feel different things at different points in my journey through life.

When younger and depressed, I would get some happiness when thinking of it.

Now older and chronically ill, the happiness is still there, kind of, just less so, and it's different. It's like when I was younger and depressed that was all I had to deal with. It was real, but it was all in my head. But now being older and sick, there's this tangible thing pushing me towards the act.

I'm having trouble articulating this but maybe I'll leave it at this.....

When I was younger and depressed thinking about suicide, I really wanted to do it.

Now when I think of it, it makes me a little sad. I want to live life. I want to live a long and comfortable life, but the comfort has been taken away from me by something I can't control. I could go out on my own terms, but now it's more of a need than a want, and it makes me sad. I do not think I will live to be 40.

 

[litany_of_thoughts]

I think it gives me peace as in I know that I have the option to just do it, like it's an option available to me if that makes sense, it makes me happy to know i have that out if i do just catastrophically destroy what stability i do have left (which seems somewhat likely atm) and the thought of trying it again does admittedly make me a little at peace in a fucked up way, in that i have more knowledge, know i need to go above ld50 for myself on what i take, etc. feels more prepared

 

[Goth]

i feel a sense of relief and peace knowing that i have a way out if life becomes too much to bear

 

[tooafraidtodiez]

why tho? my problems are probably really manageable I'm just dramatic and don't see the point of living for that long and that's totally enough for me. and if you feel so awful in life then why would you be scared? is the nothingness of death worse than this? I don't want to sound insensitive though, whatever you feel is valid I'm just saying it from my pov of course

maybe humans aren't even supposed to live that long you know? and I also just feel a little bit worthless of my own life. I'm much worse than everyone else, I feel much less real. I don't see why I wouldn't feel satisfaction on thinking leaving things behind. I just feel bad about my parents

Because of the pain I'm about to experience. If only I could do the method I preferred, it'd be better, but I don't have access to that. I'm also not that great in terms of self-worth as well, but I don't really feel worthless. I feel like we each have our purpose, even if that is just in serving other people. I also dealt with my fear of judgment recently, so honestly if it weren't for the other loads of crap that I have to deal with in life, I'd probably just keep on going. Living isn't awesome but sometimes death is just too painful, so If I can manage somehow I'd prefer living. You feeling bad about your parents is a sign you still appreciate your parents, I'm not here to tell what to do, but if you feel like there's something you still have to live for it's better for you to keep going.

 

[dust-in-the-wind]

I have been severely depressed for years. Tried over 25+meds, therapy, ketamine & ECT. I'm pretty much out of options so thinking about suicide brings me comfort. I'm just too scared to do it even though I want to be gone so badly

 

[3spiral]

Because of the pain I'm about to experience. If only I could do the method I preferred, it'd be better, but I don't have access to that. I'm also not that great in terms of self-worth as well, but I don't really feel worthless. I feel like we each have our purpose, even if that is just in serving other people. I also dealt with my fear of judgment recently, so honestly if it weren't for the other loads of crap that I have to deal with in life, I'd probably just keep on going. Living isn't awesome but sometimes death is just too painful, so If I can manage somehow I'd prefer living. You feeling bad about your parents is a sign you still appreciate your parents, I'm not here to tell what to do, but if you feel like there's something you still have to live for it's better for you to keep going.

I understand. personally I don't want to die right now, I just feel like I won't have a purpose in a couple of years. I can't make a purpose of my life and it's probably my fault. I have everything in life and I'm very probably going to get into a good college easily, but I still can't do anything of it because I'm useless and also afraid of everything. that's why it makes me so relieved to not take life that seriously (I did a thread abt this) and just act as if I had control over my death. I have really been reflecting about the possibility of ctb in some years, and it's honestly the thing that has been making me feel the most alive

 

[LastDayOnEarth]

Yeah, it makes me feel like I have control over when I die, if I choose to die this week then I could I guess

 

[SoverignDreamer97]

Not suicide, but rather... knowing I will have my rest.

 

[6486159051]

Life has been so painful. Being born to a mother who hates you and a father who is indifferent to you is so painful. I think it's affected every aspect of my personality in a negative way. I think suicide is the logical answer when you're a sponge to someone's hatred

 

[Mio_Kamimachi]

I guess. Tired of constant worries and exhaustion but i don't want to be dead either.

 

[Misanthrope0000]

Yes, I see it as the easiest escape of this shitty life, but at the same time, I'm still alive "just in case" I actually make it out of here and my life gets better, even though deep down I know it's useless and hopeless and that I'm destined to die, knowing that some of my close people are doing their best just for me, a very useless person is enough to keep myself alive just for a little longer, even out of respect so their hardwork doesn't go in vain and should at least give them a chance to help me since they desperately want to help me.

Suicide would've been the easier option, and it's definitely my next plan if they all fail to save me, I don't hate life as a whole, I only hate my current life, the poverty, the third world shithole I was born into, the culture, the hateful society, everything about this hole makes me depressed and I'm certain if I live in a better place with a better environment, my suicidal intentions would disappear, but as long as I'm stuck here, I think of happiness and peace everyday when suicide comes up in my mind.

 

[snowboard9098]

No I think about it constantly and it's overwhelming and frustrating

 

[suimaxxer]

i like thinking about suicide. its comforting to know i soon wont exist