Venting Does anyone feel like there’s no other option than suicide?

[Moonomyth]

I felt like there were options but the options involved practical choices and good fortune that were fundamentally out of reach, like receiving large financial windfalls. Of course, attempting to CTB provided exactly that windfall, so ironically I don't think the option would have existed if I hadn't believed it didn't exist.

 

[AcornUnderground]

Go to the wilderness with some people and build your own house or shelter. Find your own medication from plants. Hunt for food. You can do all of these things without money; you just need knowledge and the ability to think.

I find it funny how society has trapped us from birth into believing you cannot live without money, when in reality, you can if you try.

I have a terrible disease. I've tried all sorts of natural treatments, I have even given myself hookworms as a treatment. I need medication, unfortunately. I can't afford it.

 

[ChristopherWalken]

I know that in multiple parallel universes I made a different decision than I made many years ago. Every single one of those versions of me is having an amazing life right now, but for me, that one choice has led me to ruin. No matter what I do now, I can never be happy. Just a slow sad march to death, and I'd rather just get it over with.

 

[Proto]

I'm too weak to do anything as such as life off the grid, i always knew i wanted to end my life myself. It's just a matter of time and time is running out.

 

[Proto]

I have two people joining me who may be interested in living off the grid. Want to join us for a lifetime adventure instead of taking the easy way out?

I would really like to but when do you plan on doing it? i'd have to come all the way to Canada and i live in the Netherlands.

 

[TheSuicidalEccentric]

I would really like to but when do you plan on doing it? i'd have to come all the way to Canada and i live in the Netherlands.

YOu only have to pay for your plane ticket. I can buy all your gear and stuff. Maybe in a month or two, maybe a bit later

 

[Otter]

Depends.

Could I survive? Yes quite easily.

I have a fairly comfortable life in an external sense. I have a good education, I have money, I am financially independent, I have my own place to live in a safe area, I'm physically healthy. I have a lot of things people wish they had and I am grateful for that. It's the only positive thing I can say about my life.

However I'm a broken person on the inside, I know without a shadow of a doubt that depression has completely consumed me and I know that I'll never escape that depression living a "normal" white collar middle class life.

I know I only have two options, I either have to make a radical change in my life such as moving to live in a different country that is very different from the US or I'm going to at some point kill myself.

This is a big ditto for me. This is my exact story!

 

[symptomatic]

When I was younger I couldn't imagine dying any other way than by my own hands. But now I don't care. I'm not scared of unexplained pain I have in my chest sometimes or of driving in a snow storm. Although the absolute last thing I ever want to happen is for someone to get hurt as a result of my dying. I read an article once of a boy who jumped off an overpass, landed on a car and killed the passenger. And he survived. I cannot begin to imagine that.

I remember once a previous therapist told me that I need to remove suicide as an option. I asked something like Isn't it an option for everyone? And she said there is no circumstance where she would turn to suicide as the solution. I realized then how warped my feelings towards it are. Even now I can't fathom what it would be like to not see suicide as an exit option. It feels like a back-up sometimes, like an emergency exit from a burning building. It's a weird comfort.

 

[IsThisTheEnd?]

I've run out of money and work never works, so I can't see any option.

 

[bigdog]

Kill me