Does anyone else want to ctb due to having a bad memory?

[Squiddy]

I swear my memory is awful. I was in group therapy online today and I forgot everything people said and when my therapist asked me what I got from today's discussion, I couldn't say anything because I forgot everything. I hate forgetting whole conversations. I don't know what's wrong with my brain. I wish something could just take me out so I can finally have eternal peace.

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

I swear my memory is awful. I was in group therapy online today and I forgot everything people said and when my therapist asked me what I got from today's discussion, I couldn't say anything because I forgot everything. I hate forgetting whole conversations. I don't know what's wrong with my brain. I wish something could just take me out so I can finally have eternal peace.

My memory is terrible. It's never been good even when I was a kid. Now it's so much worse. So sorry you have to go through this as well.
People can tell me something and I won't remember it a few minutes later. It's not everything but enough to make me want to scream WTF !!!
Sometimes it's really hard to remember things I don't give a shit about. Especially work related stuff.
Still want to speed up that meteor. (I remembered something)

 

[Deleted member 1465]

My memory is good if I focus, but awful if I'm not focused. It really pissed me off when I forget something just told to me because I'm not concentrating enough. It makes me feel stupid and that pisses me off cuz I know I'm not.
But I'm weird. I can do complex equations in my head but I actually have to count on my fingers to make change. It has been suggested that I may be autistic.

 

[Oyoy]

I wish I could forget. I remember the pain which can be destracting.
I have a hard time focusing. For me my ptsd is so distracting It is what makes me not be present in the first place.

 

[Ardesevent]

Mine's just terrible in general. I forget names, faces, the meaning of words, and skip over some when I'm trying to talk. Could also just have the social skills of a 3rd grader, though.

 

[Kumachan]

Is it same with everything or just not important/boring stuff? What about something that really excites you? Also, is it long term or short? Have you got yourself examined yet?

 

[Squiddy]

Is it same with everything or just not important/boring stuff? What about something that really excites you? Also, is it long term or short? Have you got yourself examined yet?

I tend to notice it more with boring stuff, but even interesting stuff, I forget sometimes. I haven't gotten myself examined, but I probably should after this Corona is over with. And it's my short term memory that's horrible. Long term is a bit better.

 

[NotMeant2B]

Memory can be improved, but it requires a lot of effort we simply don't have the energy for. We're trapped in the vicious cycle of depression, we need to put the effort we lack in order to get out of this tiring state, that's why a support network is important.

If you still are interested into knowing how to improve your memory, you have to know about the things that affect neuroplasticity:

• Diet. It is necessary to lower the intake of "bad" fats, carbohydrates and sugars (junk food, bread, sweets), which contribute only "cheap" energy, and increase the intake of "good" fat and fiber (nuts, fish, whole grains) which improve your digesting process (leaving more energy for the brain) and provide materials for the proper functioning of your brain.
• Good sleep. Here's where memory consolidation occurs, so it's pretty important. Besides having your body cells and tissues repaired, during sleep your brain takes a moment to clear out what considers waste information. So get you a healthy schedule, empty your energy tanks during the day, and don't use your bed for any purposes other than sleeping, some exceptions may apply (!).
• Physical exercise. The brain needs oxygenated blood in order to function properly, so having a healthy blood circulation by means of exercise will lead to improvement in cognitive functions. The opposite is also true, having a very sedentary lifestyle deteriorates neutral activity.
• Mental exercise. Neurons need to maintain activity in order to strengthen synaptic bonds between each other, which leads to better experience recalling. This can be done by straight out trying to memorizing things, like numbers or names, and having activities involving mentally demanding activities, like playing chess or similars, learning new skills, or studying and analyzing things out.
• Sensorial stimuli. Smells, sounds and flavors can evoke old memories, even in situations when pure memory could not. If we want this to play to our advantage, we have to sharpen our senses by being more in the present and less with our head in the clouds, seeking out experiencies over thoughts. It's cold or hot right now? It's humid or dry? What sounds can you perceive? What does the room in which you are smells like? Automatic breathing is now turned off (got you, haha!).
• Emotional stimuli. Intense emotions make long lasting memories, which is why we still remember childhood fears and humilliations, as well as the adrenaline rush when opening the presents on christmas. The best option here is to bond and be socially open, but this has proven to be fairly hard. However, you can learn to be more honest with yourself and be more sensitive rather than rational; we can say whatever we want about being objective and loyal to the truth, but the matter of the fact is that all that bullshit is just a defence mechanism called intellectualization. There's a reason we have feeling and is that it gives us motivation (motion) for better or worse. A computer will never land on the moon by itself.

Just to add a note. Neurogenesis (the process in which new neurons are born), once believed by the scientific commmunity to be non-existent, turns out that it is indeed a thing and, go figure, the habits that promote it are very similar to the ones mentioned above. So yeah, you have to be healthy in order to... be healthy...
The system is rigged big time.

My memory is bad too, I even forget what I was saying while speaking, so I send you an empathetic hug, letting you know you are not alone.

 

[toomuchtimetodie]

I'm sure the way society is is causing early onset dementia in most people.
When I was nearing the end of adolescents I basically became an unwittingly carer to my grandmothers partner witnessing the horrific last year's of someone with dementia isn't a way to start life. The care home staff who actually care (not all do, some are there to thieve and bully and worse) anyway they are damn strong people.
Anyway I saw how he ended up and that contributed to how cruel and disgusting I already felt life was. And now I'm feeling it happening to me and I'm barely touching 30. Though I do think mines neural damage from alcohol, drugs, reckless lifestyle. I am noticing it happening to people I know only in their late 40s -50s.
In the end all we are is merely a sum of our present memories. Which is why dementia patients often drastically have personality shifts.

 

[Quarky00]

Medications? Some TCA/AP can turn one's brain into a puree..

 

[Ashleyrodriguez]

Definitely no. Seek help.

 

[Liz30]

My memory used to be great but after 30 sessions of electro-convulsive therapy (shock treatment) it's shit. The doctors said only my short term memory would be affected and even then I should eventually get those memories back. Nope. My long term memory is horrible, short term memory is bad now, and I have months completely missing. I feel like I'm not myself anymore. So frustrating. It has definitely contributed to my depression.

 

[TimeToBiteTheDust]

I don't knwo if you are taking meds. Also controlling what you eat and a good sleep time may help. If this is your main reason to ctb please re-think there are lot of things you can do to improve your memory. Stop drinking alcohol if you do. Chronic pain causes me concentration problems at work so it's one of my reasons I want to ctb because I can't give my 100%.

 

[Squiddy]

My memory is terrible. It's never been good even when I was a kid. Now it's so much worse. So sorry you have to go through this as well.
People can tell me something and I won't remember it a few minutes later. It's not everything but enough to make me want to scream WTF !!!
Sometimes it's really hard to remember things I don't give a shit about. Especially work related stuff.
Still want to speed up that meteor. (I remembered something)

Yessss speed it up please lol.

 

[mediocre]

Yes I fear it is one of my symptoms from severe b12 defiency. One of them is dementia. I fear I will get it very early. I don't want to be a live to experience that.

 

[darkhorse256]

My memory is horrible because of the trauma I've had to deal with. I can't remember conversations or most of the things I read for university. I was told my memory would get better in time but it has gotten worse and it honestly kills me inside. I used to have close to a photographic memory so the fact that my abuser not only gave me trauma but also messed up my memory makes me want to CTB. I can't live like this, knowing what I once was. My therapist isn't even useful because she just said "oh, it's ok that your memory sucks, we can get accommodations for you in uni" and my uni probably won't do anything because they're a world class university and they don't need me there.

 

[Squiddy]

I don't knwo if you are taking meds. Also controlling what you eat and a good sleep time may help. If this is your main reason to ctb please re-think there are lot of things you can do to improve your memory. Stop drinking alcohol if you do. Chronic pain causes me concentration problems at work so it's one of my reasons I want to ctb because I can't give my 100%.

I'm taking meds, though I don't think it's the cause. It's a big reason why I want to ctb, but not my main reason. Other reasons include feeling incompetent, having a hard time articulating myself verbally and having mental illness.

 

[TimeToBiteTheDust]

I can't live like this, knowing what I once was.

I feel that way too. Feels like I'm living a second life. And I can't deal with acceptance.

 

[Squiddy]

Yes I fear it is one of my symptoms from severe b12 defiency. One of them is dementia. I fear I will get it very early. I don't want to be a live to experience that.

I hope I don't have dementia. What an awful way to go and I'm only 21

 

[Billicide]

Yes! I have brain fog and now normal activities (socializing, cooking, cleaning) seem overwhelming. I've developed insomnia and all the medications that help (ambien, benzos, mirtazapine) cause dementia.

 

[Fragile]

i've had terrible short term memory issues ever since i was a child, and it's getting progressively worse as time goes on. but now that i abuse some drugs that have memory loss as the most common side effect it's really starting to affect me. i feel in a dream-like state most of my days, time flows so much faster. i can't believe that we are almost halfway through this year already.

but you know what? i don't care. this is not a life worth remembering.

 

[ChocolateCroissant]

Yes, very much. I have stress every minute of the day so my memory is very bad and declining as I can't get a hold of it well enough despite my efforts. I wake up, no matter what I do, the day has been a blur. Sometimes I wonder if things even happened. It will sound funny to most people but it takes me longer than it should to think of my name, age, etc. When I first moved, my postal code was so easy, 1+1 easy, but it took me months to remember it. Dreary, so dreary. I want to read a book and remember it. I hope yours will get better.

 

[HelensNepenthe]

I had a moment today where I frantically called several stores I was at where I thought I lost my wallet. It produced a panic attack where I had an immense feeling of anxiety, stress, and no awareness besides frantically pacing back and forth. For only my wallet to appear on the counter where I had left it. These last two months have been really difficult for me. I don't know if my memory loss is temporarily induced by stress or it's something medically that I am now aware of.

 

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

Yes, I'm honestly confident in saying it is the catalyst to everything I am and have been feeling. Any issues I have socially its because I can't relate to people using my own experiences and stories. Simply because I can't remember them or they're incredibly vague and undetailed. I underperform at work not because I don't try but because my memory seems to have such a deficit. These defecits make me feel like every one else is better than me and more aware ect. I really notice it when driving. I can drive somewhere 20 times and still not be able to get there without a GPS. Its frightening, I think my brain has faulty wiring in that sense. It's sad but it's the cards I'm dealt and my way of dealing and doing something about it is to CTB

 

[Outsider]

Try bacopa monnieri

 

[Cancún]

se están tomando benzodiazepinas?

 

[1DayItWillBover]

depression has killed my memory.. Its actually becoming scary because i will forget something maybe a min later. Would walk from my department to the office then ask myself why i went in here the first place.