• Hey Guest,

    If you would still like to donate, you still can. We have more than enough funds to cover operating expenses for quite a while, so don't worry about donating if you aren't able. If you want to donate something other than what is listed, you can contact RainAndSadness.

    Bitcoin Address (BTC): 39deg9i6Zp1GdrwyKkqZU6rAbsEspvLBJt

    Ethereum (ETH): 0xd799aF8E2e5cEd14cdb344e6D6A9f18011B79BE9

    Monero (XMR): 49tuJbzxwVPUhhDjzz6H222Kh8baKe6rDEsXgE617DVSDD8UKNaXvKNU8dEVRTAFH9Av8gKkn4jDzVGF25snJgNfUfKKNC8

M

MajorDude

Member
Aug 20, 2018
14
I just feel like I don't fit at all. Contemporary civilization, including the economy, is an artificial creation in which we are forced to participate. However, not everyone has to be willing to do it and not everyone is biologically adapted to it. I am not.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Ἡγησίας, Pallf, Pointlessabyss and 6 others
meaningisgone

meaningisgone

Student
Feb 17, 2019
112
I have been that person. I didn't realise I was that person until it was to late and I couldn't rectify my mistakes. now I've seen my flaws I will never let them get the better of me again. And I just have to hope that I get another shot at love and commitment because otherwise it's going to feel like I finally became the person I should have been but it was all to late!
Sounds like you did some solid living and learning. Life is a marathon of trial and error. The hard part, much of the time, is returning to the game with enough energy and renewed commitment to apply what you've learned, and yes, open yourself up for new ways of screwing up royally. Lol life sucks.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, brighter, ForestLove and 1 other person
B

Broken

Paragon
Dec 7, 2018
930
yes I certainly agree with that. I couldn't have done any better or different with the knowledge and skills I had at the time. Even though I can see that it was inevitable I think my problem is that I can't accept my situation as just a lesson learned. I've learned my lesson but I can't get over what I've lost. So feeling pretty stuck
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, brighter and ForestLove
Going Home

Going Home

Specialist
Sep 21, 2018
357
And I have never been fake.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can and brighter
B

Broken

Paragon
Dec 7, 2018
930
I would wager that every human is capable of pondering selfish, overtly manipulative and unfair actions. Maybe some think about those choices at fewer crossroads than others, but that's basically a complicated mess of how they were programmed, socialized, maybe random genetic factors, their habits and neural pathways and factors I have no idea about. Some people probably lean towards what we consider good actions more than others. But I have an inkling that maybe the true measure of a "good" person is to make the right choice when faced with the opportunity and compelling motive to do wrong.
Some people do just make better choices in life. All to do with the environment they've been brought up in. I also think people make better choices when they stop and think and act on rational instead of emotions. I've definitely made wrong decisions at the crossroads of life. It fucking hurts.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, brighter and ForestLove
Going Home

Going Home

Specialist
Sep 21, 2018
357
People are coaxed into believing that I am a bad person and behave accordingly. They Do Not truly know me only what they are told ,and some believe anything.
Wherever I end up I can rest assured I am not fake or a terrible person. Some would want to make me pay for the rest of my life for any mistake I've made but I will have the last word and make the last decision about my life since I cannot live in peace.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can and brighter
R

Roberto

Wizard
Jan 19, 2019
684
I am a bad person. Egoistic, aggressive, envious, jealous, slow worker, dirty, ignorant, bungler and a lot more.
 
  • Like
Reactions: njh, Redt2go, elsilbon and 3 others
meaningisgone

meaningisgone

Student
Feb 17, 2019
112
I just feel like I don't fit at all. Contemporary civilization, including the economy, is an artificial creation in which we are forced to participate. However, not everyone has to be willing to do it and not everyone is biologically adapted to it. I am not.
You're speaking the words that have bogged down my sullen soul for several years. This is real and heavy stuff, and if your experiences are like mine at all, you get met with blank stares, subject changes, and tired cliches when and if you express yourself to someone who long ago made a choice, whether consciously or not, to accept the charade of society and not think too much into it. Play the game, do the things people do, value your wealth and other things people value, etc. But people like you who see through the facade have the potential to be completely effing miserable on a level I doubt people who keep it superficial can imagine. It's a cruel irony, to be punished for thinking things through and seeing them for what they are. But people like us, the people who CAN'T function in the system the way it is, and if you're like me you've tried repeatedly and failed as often to function as expected... We're the people who make true change and evolution and innovation possible in society. It might just be a dream of a better system, and we very well may die with that dream, but the discourse we have had as living beings, and the striving to imagine a society that works for more people (I like to say "everyone" but my delusions of grandeur constantly getting shot down and dismissed by cynics is a piece of my depression puzzle), will eventually prove to have been a small part of the process that hopefully ends up making human civilization a more tolerable place for deep thinkers and those of us who could probably function in a system that made room for unconventional souls.

My point is, you're right. Money is fake. It has no inherent worth. And every stratum of society is built by made-up concepts, stuff that people dreamed, usually at previous points of human understanding and evolution, but that which was never questioned deeply enough or rebuilt to reflect new understandings, technology, and ways of thinking. And it all effing sucks. We're sidelined by the time we live in, to the point we lose our will to live. It's sad, unjust, and I think it'll improve. At a painfully slow rate (until momentum builds, which of course could take decades or more, but I predict that's where society is eventually headed, and someday these days we're festering in will be seen as a primitive, unrefined, quite obtuse chapter of human evolution). Maybe the future will head somewhere much uglier. But my hope that things can improve is literally the last little thread I've got to hold onto.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Pointlessabyss, Weeping Garbage Can, brighter and 3 others
R

Roberto

Wizard
Jan 19, 2019
684
Yeah, I pretty much know I am. I am selfish, prone to fits of rage, unable to deal with life, and seemingly incapable of looking after myself properly and making the right decisions.
I feel the same about me.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can and brighter
B

Broken

Paragon
Dec 7, 2018
930
And I have never been fake.
That's really good that you have that trait! I drew people into my life by being the person I wanted to be but I was a fake. Eventually I got exposed. Most painful thing that's ever happened to me because even though I wasn't a good person I didn't want to be that person. I just didn't see how flawed I was
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, brighter, Going Home and 1 other person
B

Broken

Paragon
Dec 7, 2018
930
I am a bad person. Egoistic, aggressive, envious, jealous, slow worker, dirty, ignorant, bungler and a lot more.
How do you deal with that? I've had the hard realisation that I am all of those things as well.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, brighter and MajorDude
R

Roberto

Wizard
Jan 19, 2019
684
I'm alone, without any kind of social life (any friends, family, or girlfriend) , besides a course I make during the mornings. I try to avoid problems.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, brighter and MajorDude
Going Home

Going Home

Specialist
Sep 21, 2018
357
That's really good that you have that trait! I drew people into my life by being the person I wanted to be but I was a fake. Eventually I got exposed. Most painful thing that's ever happened to me because even though I wasn't a good person I didn't want to be that person. I just didn't see how flawed I was

When you say fake do you mean acting nice when you were feeling low?
And what is exposed? When I think of "exposed" I think of a bunch of nosy Parkers with an opinion I never respected in the first place so their "exposing" does not mean much.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can and brighter
W

wishfulthinking

Member
Dec 13, 2018
40
no, i like myself now, altough i hated myself for a very long time. but i'm a broken and lost soul, because of abuse when i was a child. i'm also physically ill. -.-
 
  • Like
Reactions: lululoo, Roberto, Weeping Garbage Can and 3 others
B

Broken

Paragon
Dec 7, 2018
930
When you say fake do you mean acting nice when you were feeling low?
And what is exposed? When I think of "exposed" I think of a bunch of nosy Parkers with an opinion I never respected in the first place so their "exposing" does not mean much.
i had a drug problem and eventually it destroyed everything. It clouded my judgment and made me hurt people and make them give up on me. I say fake because these people came into my life because they thought I was the ideal person I was pretending to be. When I came clean about my drug problem they were there for me because I said I didn't want a drug problem and I could beat it and they had belief in me. And then I went straight back to smoking drugs behind there back. So I lost them. I've learned that when good people come into your life they expose your bad flaws and weaknesses. They didn't have to do anything to expose me as a bad flawed person. There goodness showed up my badness.
 
  • Like
Reactions: njh, Weeping Garbage Can and brighter
E

Exile

Predator, criminal, emotional blackmailer
Jan 28, 2019
181
I think I'm about average. I think most people here are well within the normal range of goodness. I also think most of us are harder on ourselves than we would be if we were assessing other people with identical characteristics. Assuming you're not a hitler, a Kim Jong Un, a Maduro or someone who chews with their mouth open, you're likely more of an ok person than you think.
 
  • Like
Reactions: njh, Roberto, Weeping Garbage Can and 2 others
B

Broken

Paragon
Dec 7, 2018
930
I think I'm about average. I think most people here are well within the normal range of goodness. I also think most of us are harder on ourselves than we would be if we were assessing other people with identical characteristics. Assuming you're not a hitler, a Kim Jong Un, a Maduro or someone who chews with their mouth open, you're likely more of an ok person than you think.
Your always a lot less forgiving of yourself but haha even though I know that I'm still not able to forgive myself and move on.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Roberto, Weeping Garbage Can, brighter and 3 others
justabouttobedone

justabouttobedone

No Longer Human
Feb 21, 2019
72
I do. I usually think that I am shittiest person alive. I am a lazy, coward, selfish, impatient, asocial, unstable, useless piece of garbage. I didn't realized that I was a burden to my family until two months ago. Now I am aware that I have to change, do something useful etc. I am trying my best but I am not able to do what I have to do anymore. I am damaged from meds and hoping to recover for two months yet there is no sign of recovery in the horizon.
 
  • Like
Reactions: njh, Roberto, Weeping Garbage Can and 1 other person
seekingoblivion

seekingoblivion

Arcanist
Dec 11, 2018
454
Bad? Nah! Useless pathetic and stupid? Perhaps a little, perhaps a lot
 
  • Like
Reactions: Ἡγησίας, Pointlessabyss, Roberto and 3 others
Paranoid Mind

Paranoid Mind

Member
Nov 28, 2018
6
I am the worst person I know, and I know some really fucked up people.
 
  • Like
Reactions: njh, Pointlessabyss, Weeping Garbage Can and 2 others
Glim

Glim

Student
Jan 28, 2019
105
Not sure about labeling myself as "bad" but who knows how much suffering I've caused by contributing to the factory farm animal industry. I've ate a lot of meat, bought a lot of dairy products and whey protein
 
  • Like
Reactions: Ἡγησίας, Weeping Garbage Can and Redt2go
Querry1

Querry1

life is unfair, ctb or get away
Aug 16, 2018
180
No, i think I'm generally a good person but martial arts teached me to stay humble.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Roberto, Weeping Garbage Can, Going Home and 1 other person
F

ForgetAboutMe

Member
Feb 21, 2019
48
I am neither bad or good. I'm nothing, shapeless. I've done good things and I've done evil things, at this point i'm just a input>output device for the world around me. I'm worthless, a side character, with no destination and no compass.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Redt2go, Roberto and Weeping Garbage Can
H

Heart Shards

The shards of my broken heart cut deep.
Feb 3, 2019
535
Not bad per se, just a woman who's been down on her luck for a long time. I feel more of a burden than anything.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Redt2go and Weeping Garbage Can
dysfunctional

dysfunctional

Arcanist
Oct 26, 2018
459
The depression tells me that i'm worthless and a bad person. In some ways it has made me that way. I always held myself to a high standard of integrity. Then when my brain dysfunctioned I started doing alot of things I didn't believe in. But I don't think I'm a bad person just very sick.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, Redt2go and Roberto
C

Cookiedough8956

Wowzers
Feb 24, 2019
636
No and that's the problem. Good people have it the worst most often.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Pulpit2018, Weeping Garbage Can and 3 others
Xaphous

Xaphous

hikikomori
Nov 11, 2018
550
Inherently good natured, but society hates that and loves ego and arrogance. I don't know how to live so I avoid everything and everyone and that makes me bad. I have no use in society so I'm probably best off in a cave in the mountains alone for the rest of my shit life.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Pulpit2018, Weeping Garbage Can, Redt2go and 3 others
Kikoo Loool

Kikoo Loool

Enlightened
Feb 25, 2019
1,128
Yes, I think I am. I feel like I have wasted my life, spoiled family and career. As far as I could remember, since I was a child I think I am a bad person, hate myself and ant to die. Unfortunately, the coward I am has alays been unable to ctb, even just trying it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Menschenfeind, Weeping Garbage Can and Redt2go
elsilbon

elsilbon

[ ]
Dec 31, 2018
16
I am a bad person. Egoistic, aggressive, envious, jealous, slow worker, dirty, ignorant, bungler and a lot more.

I'm also all of those things, for a while I thought that I was at least smart but it's mostly anxious rigid thinking that gets lucky from time to time.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can and Redt2go
Megsallthewaydone

Megsallthewaydone

Member
Feb 4, 2019
24
I feel as though my existence is unnecessary. Like the things I do and say, don't matter, won't matter, and would maybe even make the people around me feel BETTER if non-existent
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can and Redt2go

Similar threads

VeryShy
Replies
12
Views
184
Offtopic
kilowatt
kilowatt
pilotviolin
Replies
19
Views
376
Offtopic
BrokeN__lil’__girl
BrokeN__lil’__girl
S
Replies
2
Views
110
Suicide Discussion
Praestat_Mori
P
mtrx
Replies
1
Views
103
Recovery
Dayrain
D
ForgottenAgain
Replies
5
Views
208
Recovery
ambivalent_thespian
ambivalent_thespian