Do you resent your parents for bringing you into this life?

[Homo erectus]

No. If there has to be life, it will happen anyway, even with different parents, or no parents.

 

[Life'sA6itch]

You bet i do! There weren't any photos taken of me after about the age of 6 aside from those that you might have done on picture day at school. My parents always bought the photos for my older & younger sister but never for me. They would never buy me a yearbook either but did so for both my siblings. Mom and dad gave my older and younger siblings, cars, braces to straighten their teeth, driving lessons, they went to their proms and graduations and to college right after high school. I was given none of that and I was the middle child, the only one who actually needed jaw surgery & braces. My mom tried forcing me, a timid young girl into the Navy so I wouldn't be a burden to her in any form. Never went to my own proms or graduation, not a damned person in my "family" even mentioned my graduation/showed any interest and no one acknowledged any of the other glaring differences in how I was treated by my own parents and I was never actually hugged or told I love you by my mom. All this is on top of abuse and neglect from my mom ever since I was a toddler and my mom beating me and forcing me to lie to my dad about her cheating that she would take both me and my younger sister out with her as her alibi's. We sat in an adjacent living room or were sent out to play while at other men's homes and as a young girl I witnessed one man giving her cash after opening a door where they both came out of a bedroom!

There was no discussion of anything whether it be hopes or dreams, jobs or plans after school, etc. I was always threatened and or beaten by my mom for asking simple or logical questions and always ordered around to do chores. I was threatened with beating for simply asking "what?" To her I was not to be heard or "bother" her in any way shape or form. There was no hug after she told me a neighbor died. Instead, when I cried I was hit over the head with a wooden hairbrush for crying at the death of a nice old lady! FF to being adults, mom's "friend" and my older sister STOLE $73,333 USD of my inheritance, an inheritance I never knew about until AFTER IT WAS STOLEN. I had to fight to become administrator when our mom died just to unravel all this and find out who stole what. The total amount stolen from my mom by my sister and mom's so called-friend was nearly $220,000 USD that should have gone to each of us 3 children. Local "authorities" refused to do anything (stealing from the elderly is allowed - it's the only crime people are not prosecuted for). Only because I ordered mom's house sold did we all split $10,000 USD each after I paid our mom's bills. I don't really speak to my sisters and am continuing to hate life after a very bad childhood has transitioned to a predictably bad adulthood. My younger sister I still care for, my older sister will die before she ever sees my face without me absolutely smashing hers. Who says blood is thicker than water?????

 

[Aim]

I hate to say this, but i despise my parents so much ,all they ever did was create drama, lies, dysfunction and missery. So if they somehow died tomorrow. There would be zero fucks given on my part. I don't love my family. In fact I hope karma will hit them so hard. That they will eventually regret having any children at all.

 

[sserafim]

Yeah I guess so. I resent them for bringing me into existence, the worst thing is that I didn't even get a say in it. I never asked for any of this. I wish that I had the choice to consent or not beforehand. I hate living and life itself. This world and reality is just so boring and depressing. Furthermore, I was unlucky enough to be born neurodivergent so I'll never be a good fit for the world anyways, and it'll never be a good fit for me.

 

[kkrnb.inai]

nah. i think it's immature and selfish to believe that the only reason your parents brought you here was to make you miserable. however i do believe that your child committing IS a risk that comes with having children, as with everything else that could happen.

 

[thinvy]

I don't resent them per say, but I do wish I had been aborted. my parents would've realized that they were better friends than lovers, separated way earlier, and my dad wouldn't have had to die like he did. and for that I feel regret over my birth

 

[divinemistress36]

I have loving parents but it's so hard to not resent them at times for bringing me into this world as selfish as it sounds . I'm always in so much pain but they won't let me go

 

[kotonearisato]

I resent my mother. She was not fit to be a parent and I think a lot of things would've gone very differently in my childhood if she were someone else. I'm not sure if it's exactly resenting her for me being alive, but more like resenting her for how things turned out for me.

My father, no. He didn't know what my relationship with my mother was like until years after I went no contact with her. There was really no way he could've predicted how things would go, and I know he blames himself for a lot of it. I couldn't resent him for anything if I tried.

 

[sleepingintherain]

i don't resent them at all, most people enjoy life and they thought i would too. it's not their fault i was born with all these genetics defects, my sisters all turned out fine. i just got unlucky.

 

[ReadyOrNot?]

Resentment? No. Not anymore. I made peace with that.
But I wish they wouldn't have done it.

 

[jujuklam]

Not always, but a fair amount of the time, yes. My sister has said from time to time that our parents should never had children.

 

[schizochicken]

No i dont resent them because they were doing their best, based on their own experience, morality, and judgement. They shared the common goal of bringing a child into the world, and for that child to experience life. It hurts knowing they will be in pain when I CTB, but it is not their fault, nor do I blame them in anyway. Its just the circumstances of my own life and mental illness that are responsible for my early exit.

 

[sserafim]

No. If there has to be life, it will happen anyway, even with different parents, or no parents.

What do you mean by that?

 

[ijustwishtodie]

No, I don't resent them. After all, I can't as my parents were brainwashed like all pro lifers are to think that having children is good. I do wish that they aborted me but I don't hate them for giving birth to me. Instead I hate existence for what it is

 

[BorderlineChellery]

My mum has expressed many times that she shouldn't have had children. So yeah, that definitely makes me resent her

 

[Tommen Baratheon]

Not at all.

 

[f1lth]

no, they have both passed on but i have never resented them. Especially since theyve passed on, it feels pointless to remember them badly. They didnt think nor did they want me to be miserable, they didnt bring me into this world knowing id feel this way for most of my life. Im sure if they knew, they wouldn'tve. They were good people and i miss them dearly, they wanted the best for me and that didnt happen, its not their fault.

 

[cold_severance]

yes. they should not have been allowed to have children or pets.

 

[matt1968]

I think I lean towards the inevitability of being brought into this world. So if not my parents, with other parent (s) or caregiver.

So I've voted "No" but I do resent that they were emotionally unavailable and it wasn't an emotionally-safe or nurturing environment. It feels a lot to ask - I know my counsellor feels it could have been different.

But the result is that I am now spooked by life and most other people and my spirit has been crushed.

 

[The Schizoid]

Gotta say the poll results annoy me. It's not your parents fault they weren't well acqauinted with anti-natalist beliefs before they had you.

I don't resent my parents for having me because they thought they could provide me with a good life, and they actually did, but my issues would have occurred with or without abuse/bad parenting.

I think some of you are being stupid. If your parents were abusers/neglected you and weren't prepared for you then I can understand resenting them for that, but anyone who hates their parents simply because they had kids are being silly. They may simply have not known any better. Many of your parents never had access to the level of internet and info we have now.

If your issues aren't being caused by your parents then your resentment towards them is unjustified. Life is life, people have the urge to fuck and have kids. And don't say "my issues are caused by them because without them I'd not be here suffering". No.

It was absolutely possible that maybe you'd have a better life than you do now. Not everyone has a shit life. Again, if your parents abused or neglected you, resenting them is reasonable. But if they did not, then your resentment is unwarranted, and you need to get over your victim mentality.

Anyone here who thinks they're a victim simply for being born is a whiny child. Grow up. If you want to kill yourself then that's up to you, don't blame everyone else for your predicament.

 

[rozeske]

I don't resent them for birthing me. But I do resent them for telling me how much they regret having me through out my entire childhood, for telling me how much jealous they are of other parents and their children, for telling me how they wish i die.....the list goes on.

 

[The Schizoid]

I don't resent them for birthing me. But I do resent them for telling me how much they regret having me through out my entire childhood, for telling me how much jealous they are of other parents and their children, for wishing I die......the list goes on.

I'm so sorry.

 

[Homo erectus]

What do you mean by that?

Life can be created in other ways, e.g. in laboratory without identifiable parents. In modern societies, children are increasingly subject to rules, activities, and environmental impacts outside the family. The decision and act of giving birth are perhaps only remotely related to the difficulties people face later in life.

 

[betternever2havbeen]

Gotta say the poll results annoy me. It's not your parents fault they weren't well acqauinted with anti-natalist beliefs before they had you.

It's not like you need to know anything about antinatalism to understand that people suffer in life, and no one asks to be born. Why do we ALWAYS let parents off the hook. They created life, whatever happens to their child is partly (I would argue entirely) their fault. Especially when parents have the mentality to blame everyone else for stuff that happens to their kids as we're seeing with the Kenneth Law case. There's also another case where parents blamed a university for their daughters death because she killed herself as she was so anxiety-ridden over having to do a presentation. They don't ever look at themselves, it must be the world's fault for not being accommodating enough. Parents are to blame, and if anyone is whiny it's them. They knowingly bring kids into a messed up world and then when it all goes wrong and something terrible happens to their kid, blame everybody else.

 

[Tokugawa_Yoshinobu]

Not really.

 

[ummagumma]

no
they didnt mean any harm. they just love each other and wanted to have a child to love it too. they are positive mentally stable people and dont fixate on thoughts how awful everything is

 

[ObscureSunshine]

Absolutely not.
I believe I chose my parents & the major experiences I've had during this physical life journey.

I do become frustrated with myself for some of the extraordinary challenges that have crossed my path & why I thought I could handle being suicidal, prideful, and intensely loyal/committed to the needs loved ones over my own for a whole lifetime.

 

[sserafim]

I think I lean towards the inevitability of being brought into this world. So if not my parents, with other parent (s) or caregiver.

What do you mean? Would it still be *you* though?

Absolutely not.
I believe I chose my parents & the major experiences I've had during this physical life journey.

I do become frustrated with myself for some of the extraordinary challenges that have crossed my path & why I thought I could handle being suicidal, prideful, and intensely loyal/committed to the needs loved ones over my own for a whole lifetime.

Why do you believe that you chose your parents and major experiences in life? I heard a theory that everyone chooses their parents and life before they're born…

 

[DoomValuer]

Bringing me into this universe wasn't their brightest idea but it's not like they could've just known, so I don't resent them regardless.

 

[Final_Choice]

Not my mom, she didn't consent to it but my asshole dad didn't care about that. I do resent him though, and he knows it.