I do. One is to compare and more specifically in a pain olympics type of way. I've noticed it with friends and people here. I both hate the phrase: 'at least' but then- I also find myself using it. Both in my head and out loud. 'At least you have this going for you. At least you don't have that to deal with'. How can something infuriate you and yet- you can find yourself doing it to others?
I suppose it's hypocritical really. Lazy probably too. Like a kind of stock answer for something- try to get them to look on the bright side.
The other one I've noticed both myself but mostly a friend doing is trying to paint something in a more positive light. Often with totally unrealistic statements. My Dad once told me I could do anything I wanted in life. Become an astonaut even. Which is ridiculous! Very few of us get to pursue any dream we have. Not that I wanted to be an astronaut in the first place! But, we are all limited by our abilities, our finances, our health.
It's almost insulting when you hear crap like that. It might even be more prefarable to just hear the truth- that they can't cope with our problems/ situation at that point. Rather than to come out with some insane insistance that everything is possible as an actual solution.
I wonder why it happens though. I noticed once at work, one colleague used to try to manage everyone- she'd notice if someone was late back from a break for instance. She wasn't a Supervisor or anything but, she'd always be on at people about something. I noticed that she then genuinely would be late too sometimes and, people would also pick up on that. So, I suppose it was retaliatory in both directions. She ended up being dismissed for stealing it was rumoured! Kind of crazy really. She lorded it about so much and then she was actually thieving from the company. Maybe that was her cover.
I think parents do it especially though I've noticed- repeat the parenting style they received. Even if they hated it. I suppose some probably reject it though- if it was too damaging.
I suppose it's hypocritical really. Lazy probably too. Like a kind of stock answer for something- try to get them to look on the bright side.
The other one I've noticed both myself but mostly a friend doing is trying to paint something in a more positive light. Often with totally unrealistic statements. My Dad once told me I could do anything I wanted in life. Become an astonaut even. Which is ridiculous! Very few of us get to pursue any dream we have. Not that I wanted to be an astronaut in the first place! But, we are all limited by our abilities, our finances, our health.
It's almost insulting when you hear crap like that. It might even be more prefarable to just hear the truth- that they can't cope with our problems/ situation at that point. Rather than to come out with some insane insistance that everything is possible as an actual solution.
I wonder why it happens though. I noticed once at work, one colleague used to try to manage everyone- she'd notice if someone was late back from a break for instance. She wasn't a Supervisor or anything but, she'd always be on at people about something. I noticed that she then genuinely would be late too sometimes and, people would also pick up on that. So, I suppose it was retaliatory in both directions. She ended up being dismissed for stealing it was rumoured! Kind of crazy really. She lorded it about so much and then she was actually thieving from the company. Maybe that was her cover.
I think parents do it especially though I've noticed- repeat the parenting style they received. Even if they hated it. I suppose some probably reject it though- if it was too damaging.
