i hate myself because i'm just nor a good person. no matter what i want to do or who i want to be, it comes down to the fact i make mistakes and hurt people terribly because i'm just a disease that shouldn't exist. i wish i had lived my life as a more positive person that never did anything wrong to people.
even if i try to change, it won't mean anything when there's still people out there that i've hurt and can't ever apologise to because they wouldn't want to hear my words anyway and i have no easy way of contacting these people.
they'll hate me, but they can never hate me more than how i hate myself.
changing is pointless if there are still so many sins i've left behind and scars i've left on people.
i wish i had been born with a heart, is all.