Discussion Do you ever use humour for your suicidality?

[PersonBeforeLife]

I'll give an example. For where I would have to disclose where I was but don't want the judgment... I literally called a mental asylum I was at a 700 CHF per night mental wellness retreat as a flex...

I actually laugh suicide helplines pull that... "So your suicidal?... Ok... Oh congratulations ... Did you know your our 1 millionth caller and have won an all expenses paid mental wellness retreat!"

Honestly I don't get why people are so against being institutionalised... You can sleep all day and rant about how awful life is every minute your awake to people that are paid to put up with it and have all your food cooked for you... It's really just a different kind of holiday. But I know some people here have had really bad experiences with institutionalization but I don't think this is the norm for most people in the world.

Thought Sasu could have a cultural holiday (maybe September mental wellness month) where everyone meets in real life and if there's activists they can play running of the Sasu members trying to catch all of us to institutionalise all of us like running of the bulls (I think in Spain) I bet I can outlast all of you as I'd like to think I make a damn good hostage negotiator and could talk my way out of it with very creative phrasing ... You get caught then you get to sleep all day in hospital and get waited on hand and foot with all your food cooked for you and you literally don't have to do anything and can rant endlessly to the doctors about how shit life is and when you want out just pretend to be fine but don't oversell it... Too much. Zurich PUK was kinda strict before discharging me but legally I don't think they could actually keep me... In fact they tricked me into signing a document telling me I could come and go from the hospital as needed and the moment I signed the document they basically locked me up ... Cheeky

 

[Passenger4224]

I love joking about suicide, even though I'm usually the only one laughing.

I kind of enjoyed my few days in the hospital, I had a small little group I walked around with and talked to. Most staff were nice, got along with everyone well and hope they are all doing well. There were some people were super fucking annoying and caused drama constantly. For some reason even the violent unpredictable guys really liked me. Because I'm innocent or something idk.

But not every hospital is like the one I was at, and I was lucky to be placed in the highest rated one in the area.

I would not go back, because I prefer having the freedom to die whenever I choose.

 

[PersonBeforeLife]

I love joking about suicide, even though I'm usually the only one laughing.

I kind of enjoyed my few days in the hospital, I had a small little group I walked around with and talked to. Most staff were nice, got along with everyone well and hope they are all doing well. There were some people were super fucking annoying and caused drama constantly. For some reason even the violent unpredictable guys really liked me. Because I'm innocent or something idk.

But not every hospital is like the one I was at, and I was lucky to be placed in the highest rated one in the area.

I would not go back, because I prefer having the freedom to die whenever I choose.

For me personally to actually have a Sasu in real life community it's worth the risk... Loneliness is a death sentence for me... To be able to meet people and be vulnerable together... Don't think many families are even close like that.

 

[Passenger4224]

For me personally to actually have a Sasu in real life community it's worth the risk... Loneliness is a death sentence for me... To be able to meet people and be vulnerable together... Don't think many families are even close like that.

ikr, it felt so nice to talk to people and learn about their issues and support each other.

I got multiple phone numbers after my stay but nobody stayed in touch (I never took it personally though, they were going through a lot)

 

[PersonBeforeLife]

May

ikr, it felt so nice to talk to people and learn about their issues and support each other.

I got multiple phone numbers after my stay but nobody stayed in touch (I never took it personally though, they were going through a lot)

I know I speak to someone on discord I met on Sasu. Maybe have a discord group if there isn't one already and hopefully people don't have any personally identifiable information in their accounts. I think discord has video call... Most people would probably wear masks or something or face coverings but the safety standards and rules would have to be solid.

 

[Somewhat Suicidal]

Definitely made me cynical to some extend at times. gallows humour was always something I liked tho, so why not about this subject where it's most warranted and needed to make it somehow fun.
Regarding the big Sasu meet-up, that would be super funny, too as I already wrote in another thread with you xD

I got multiple phone numbers after my stay but nobody stayed in touch (I never took it personally though, they were going through a lot)

It's somehow always like this. I even managed to stay in touch with a few for while in every clinic I ever was (4), but it mostly just fades out at some point because most of the people actually get helped and are doing way better than me in life after their stay...

I know I speak to someone on discord I met on Sasu. Maybe have a discord group if there isn't one already and hopefully people don't have any personally identifiable information in their accounts. I think discord has video call... Most people would probably wear masks or something or face coverings but the safety standards and rules would have to be solid.

I would be game if you'd set something up, I currently can't be assed. Voice chat would be so nice in many cases. But I fear many would not trust it because of the fear of being tracked down somehow...

 

[PeaceSeeker83]

I guess so. I keep alluding to the fact anti suicide campaigners need a broomstick up their arses lol.

 

[calicocat07]

yeah, tbh i wish i could find more people who are able to joke about suicide. i forget not everyone sees it so lightly, ha!

 

[roborabbit]

I love hearing and making jokes about suicide, depression, mental illness.

I have mixed thoughts on hospitalization. I've only had decent experiences thus far but I still find myself terrified of going back. It feels like losing. Some would say the dying would be losing but. That would be accomplishing what I set out to do. I call an ambulance mid attempt or i let my theraoist talk me into going in and somehow that feels like the cowardly part. I go to the hospital and I become Perfect Patient and try to be so chill and nice and psychoeducated. I'm gunning for that Good Grade In Therapy and then I get out and Im like damn I should've went berserk when I had the chance. I should've cried and screamed when I felt like it.

 

[PersonBeforeLife]

I love hearing and making jokes about suicide, depression, mental illness.

I have mixed thoughts on hospitalization. I've only had decent experiences thus far but I still find myself terrified of going back. It feels like losing. Some would say the dying would be losing but. That would be accomplishing what I set out to do. I call an ambulance mid attempt or i let my theraoist talk me into going in and somehow that feels like the cowardly part. I go to the hospital and I become Perfect Patient and try to be so chill and nice and psychoeducated. I'm gunning for that Good Grade In Therapy and then I get out and Im like damn I should've went berserk when I had the chance. I should've cried and screamed when I felt like it.

Interesting you say that. Basically it's probably like that for most. The environment changes to be less shit and quality of life changes (shocking... Who could have guessed)

I mean... Sometimes I wonder if I would have rather just been born is North Korea where prosperity is low but communities are close like families. Loneliness is probably not even a thing. I've seen testimonials from North Koreans who escaped that said that Western society... People don't know eachother... I bet none of us here even know all our neighbours names?

Statistically Amish societies I think rank the lowest for depression so there is probably something there... No stupid rat race and online popularity contests... Everything URL and completely local.

I guess so. I keep alluding to the fact anti suicide campaigners need a broomstick up their arses lol.

A counter protest could be fun... Do our own running of the bulls where they have to catch us... And if caught we just get a wellness retreat.

But more importantly it will bring awareness between temporary situational suicidality and permanent situational suicidality and that is what's the most important.

Maybe those people actually need to speak to people like us... Like I imagine one of them telling me "suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem" and I'm like... You know the problem has been going on for 17 years and I still see no way out right? Please explain how it's temporary?

Definitely made me cynical to some extend at times. gallows humour was always something I liked tho, so why not about this subject where it's most warranted and needed to make it somehow fun.
Regarding the big Sasu meet-up, that would be super funny, too as I already wrote in another thread with you xD


It's somehow always like this. I even managed to stay in touch with a few for while in every clinic I ever was (4), but it mostly just fades out at some point because most of the people actually get helped and are doing way better than me in life after their stay...


I would be game if you'd set something up, I currently can't be assed. Voice chat would be so nice in many cases. But I fear many would not trust it because of the fear of being tracked down somehow...

I'm terrified at hosting it because of legal reasons. Like id join 1 definitely but to host 1 and I'm no longer targeted by medical professionals but law enforcement if something happens and I provided the platform for it to happen... A whole different ball game.

Don't know why Sasu can't just have video chat and voice call added to it.

 

[Somewhat Suicidal]

I'm terrified at hosting it because of legal reasons. Like id join 1 definitely but to host 1 and I'm no longer targeted by medical professionals but law enforcement if something happens and I provided the platform for it to happen... A whole different ball game.

Don't know why Sasu can't just have video chat and voice call added to it.

I guess would need strict server rules to only not post anything that might expose to any legal jeopardy and what people talk in private voice or video chats is not your purview... but I get your concern. It would require some thought and work, I definitely feel up to neither atm and the foreseeable future, I'm struggling way too hard with every little thing, as is.

Probably for the same reason, also requires much more potent and expensive servers... sucks that we can't just use the established infrastructures like any other community

 

[.idiot]

"lol this shit aint nothing no biggie really lmao" sums up the entire reason I still draw air into my lungs within the confines of the present moment