• ⚠️ UK Access Block Notice: Beginning July 1, 2025, this site will no longer be accessible from the United Kingdom. This is a voluntary decision made by the site's administrators. We were not forced or ordered to implement this block. If you're located in the UK, we recommend using a VPN to maintain access.

CrazyDiamond04

CrazyDiamond04

Metal Fan- Wants to hang Under The Oak
May 8, 2023
481
I find myself fantasizing about it a lot recently. Mostly in regards to people finding me or my funeral. I also fantasize about doing it in an extremely violent fashion like a shotgun or something. It's weird. It feels wrong to think like this but it also feels good in a weird way, I don't know. I think about it a lot. I guess it's a natural thing to wonder about when you're in this situation.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: pthnrdnojvsc, Lostandlooking, Passersby and 1 other person
Death is my goal

Death is my goal

pathetic failure
Aug 25, 2022
516
who doesn't
 
  • Hugs
  • Yay!
Reactions: bored2death and EndJstifiesTheMeans
I

iwanttoleave2000

evan
Aug 5, 2023
39
I fantasize about leaving but I try not to think about people finding me, as that is the aspect of it that I do not want to confront.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Lostandlooking
Passersby

Passersby

Trapped in space and time
Aug 29, 2019
1,644
Of course I do. I think it's completely normal to fantasize about ctb because we want relief and to be gone. It's a rational response to the messed up world we live in. If something is broken, I want to fix it or throw it away. Lots of things can't be fixed too but any reason is really valid since the individual was never able to choose for themselves before coming here the least we can do is choose how and when to die.
 
Aloneisbestforme

Aloneisbestforme

Terminally online
Aug 17, 2023
94
Not all the time but most of the time I do.

The idea of leaving and hopefully having forever peace is a very nice thought to have. it's a escape from the pain the world offers.
and sometimes it's what helps me sleep.

It is not weird at all
 
  • Like
Reactions: pthnrdnojvsc
Grimscribe

Grimscribe

In Defense of Non-Existence
May 16, 2023
48
Sometimes, yes.
I used to fantasize about having cancer when I was younger because, in my mind, it would be a lot more dramatic for other people and less painful for my mother.
Nowadays, I only think about immediate reactions to a possible CTB, and the only thing really stopping me is my mother, I wouldn't want to hurt her.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: iwanttoleave2000
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,681
Of course I do, to permanently be free from this existence is all I've ever truly wished for after all and suicide is the one escape from all suffering and harm in an existence I never wished to be burdened with in the first place. I'm always wishing that methods as peaceful as Nembutal were accessible and I imagine the relief it would bring me if I had the option to just fall asleep eternally where this existence will finally be forgotten about and won't even be a distant memory.
 
アホペンギン

アホペンギン

Jul 10, 2023
2,191
I always fantasize about it, whenever I see a building (a tall one, that is) I always imagine myself jumping off of it. Or I think about shooting myself, ingesting sn or N, hanging myself, etc.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Passersby
Borderline

Borderline

Borderline Personality Disorder
Aug 8, 2023
79
I fantasize about killing myself every day and night.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Passersby
XenoPyo

XenoPyo

눈을 감자
Aug 16, 2023
47
All the time. I fantasize a partner ctb both of us using CO method, inebriated, and playing some Zelda waiting for ctb
 
  • Like
Reactions: Passersby

Similar threads

iichi
Replies
4
Views
261
Suicide Discussion
monetpompo
monetpompo
TheLastGreySky
Replies
17
Views
300
Suicide Discussion
StrawberryRed
StrawberryRed
SomeBody123
Replies
6
Views
380
Suicide Discussion
CatAstro.Fee
CatAstro.Fee
toxicjester
Replies
14
Views
495
Offtopic
psp3000
psp3000