Discussion Do you deserve to die? Or do you want to die?

[yujinwunz]

Hi,

Just wondering how many people here feel like they actually deserve to die, rather than just wanting to die.

I'm guessing the reasons for wanting to die include terminal illness, or the pain of loneliness / despair, or guilt for doing something that wasn't truly your fault.

I don't want to list the deserved side because that's a bit rich of me to decide who deserves death or not, but feel free to discuss it.

I'm definitely in the deserved camp, what about you?

 

[death137]

I think I deserve to die because my main problem is unfixable.

Why you said you also deserve to die?

 

[DetachedDreamer97]

Hard to say... I can't fully say I deserve to die, and I can't say I want to die... But it's not like I'm being left with much of a choice. I'm far behind in life. I can't make friends. I can't form meaningful relationships. And everywhere I go, I'm convinced nobody wants me, not even my mother. I'll say it's more of a need than either of these things.

 

[ZardozOmega]

Both for me.

 

[yujinwunz]

I am a convicted pedophile, and I'm going to face a minimum of 4 years prison here in Australia. I've already been in prison for 1 year a few years ago. I'm 26 so I might be in my mid 30's when this is over, which is still a lot of time left, but I don't think I have any hope of experiencing more happiness than pain. I had a normal life and was growing up just fine before, and now it's just a vicious cycle to becoming more and more estranged.

So I'm pretty serious about ending my life, there just isn't much point left anymore. I am causing my parents more pain every day while I am alive.

Looking around, I don't want to downplay people's problems, but honestly most of you people seem pretty normal and in situations that aren't permanent, or aren't heinous or a fault on your own.

 

[stygal]

Neither, just bad luck I guess.

 

[yujinwunz]

I think I deserve to die because my main problem is unfixable.

Likewise why do you say that?

 

[TwinBranch]

I feel like I deserve to die because I don't add any value to anyone's life. When I leave this planet, it's not like people will be crying at my funeral. But I do want to die because my problems are not able to be fixed, and they stem from abuse from my mom. When I was younger I knew that I would be depressed when I was older, but I didn't expect to be diagnosed with depression when I was 11 years old.

 

[death137]

Likewise why do you say that?

Because you can't fix shortness or skull deformity.

 

[yujinwunz]

Because you can't fix shortness or skull deformity.

IMO you don't deserve to die due to that, you have not done anything wrong. I can relate if you feel like you want to but you surely don't deserve to. It must be tough to carry on when people think of you a certain way, but you have a physical trait and there's no way that makes anyone deserving to die.

 

[Avyn]

I don't know, I think I just want to die, but probably not deserve to die

 

[booray]

I don't think that anybody deserves to die unless they did something so heinous that no other punishment seems fit, for example Osama bin Laden. However, if someone believes that they deserve to die for whatever reason, then who am I to second guess that? In the end, if they die, whether they wanted it or felt that they deserved it, they're going to be dead. In my case, I want to die because of mistakes I made in the past that have caused my life to become unbearable, with very little hope that things will get better in the future. Even though I have only myself to blame, I don't believe that I deserve to die. And I'd rather not have to die at all, to be honest, but I feel as though I have no choice because I'm unwilling to live a life diminished by untreatable depression and crippling anxiety that are only getting worse not better. Only time will tell, but I'm losing patience because this has been going on for far too long.

 

[StateOfMind]

Looking around, I don't want to downplay people's problems, but honestly most of you people seem pretty normal and in situations that aren't permanent, or aren't heinous or a fault on your own.

I would have to agree with this.

Hi,

Just wondering how many people here feel like they actually deserve to die, rather than just wanting to die.

I'm guessing the reasons for wanting to die include terminal illness, or the pain of loneliness / despair, or guilt for doing something that wasn't truly your fault.

I don't want to list the deserved side because that's a bit rich of me to decide who deserves death or not, but feel free to discuss it.

I'm definitely in the deserved camp, what about you?

Anyone who doesn't want to live anymore "deserves" to die in my opinion.

 

[Lmd]

I did nothing wrong. My health could be better but I don't care and I'm in a momment of my life where I reach what I wanted my whole life and still I'm choosing to die.

 

[LastFlowers]

Well I don't deserve to die in the way that I've done something to be executed for, but I do deserve death as an end to my insufferable existence. I also deserved a life, but I was not afforded what would be necessary for me to live a decent one, as of now, I can't even be me, nevermind have that 'me' lead a life worth living.

 

[NodusTollens]

Based on the choices, want- though I'm using that term loosely. More accurately, I want the pain to stop.

No more hurting/being a burden to others. No more internal dialogue about being a POS. No more physical/emotional pain. No more struggling through social interactions that leave me feeling exposed & other'd. And this doesn't including being a contributing member of society & the stressors that accompany- it all just makes the underlying ideation worse.

The only reason I would say that I deserved to die, would be to lessen the burden on the remaining supports in my life.

 

[setomikey]

Hi,

Just wondering how many people here feel like they actually deserve to die, rather than just wanting to die.

I'm guessing the reasons for wanting to die include terminal illness, or the pain of loneliness / despair, or guilt for doing something that wasn't truly your fault.

I don't want to list the deserved side because that's a bit rich of me to decide who deserves death or not, but feel free to discuss it.

I'm definitely in the deserved camp, what about you?

Hi.
Well, I have some guilt on me, true, but I don't think that I deserve to die.
I just want to die because I am at rock bottom and in an impossible situation with no way out.

 

[_Kaira_]

Neither really. I don't want to die, but I don't want to live either. This limbo status is unforgiving.

 

[NeverGoodEnuff]

There are probably a few people out there who think I deserve to die because I did not fulfill their unstated expectations.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I deserve to die because I no longer have any empathy for others, not even myself. My body and mind only wants one thing for itself besides death, and that's to breed. Sure my emotions disguise this filthy desire by saying it actually wants love and intimacy but that's just there to prevent me from succeeding in my ultimate mission to destroy someone's life by making me a part of theirs. I don't see any future where I ever regain my capacity to be a good person again and even if I've never done anything illegal I definitely would if given the power. I deserve to die because if allowed to live and flourish I would 100% be a terrible type of person that everyone even people here can hate. For me confidence can't come without selfishness. I only derive pleasure at the suffering of others especially when they care about me. There are days where I wish I could kill everyone especially innocent people, painfully and slowly.

And yet I never go through with it not out of the goodness of my heart, of which there is none, but because I am lazy. Another reason I deserve to die is because I don't see myself making any effort to live unless every single maddening condition is met for me to have a perfect life. I don't deserve to live because to me the only way to live is with a happily ever after. Is that crazy? You bet it is.

So I guess I am both. I want to die because I deserve to die and I deserve to die because I want to (and because I'd definitely keep hurting people for as long as I'm alive).

 

[Deleted member 22693]

Kind of want to at this point guess that is what prompted me to look up sites and discover sanctioned suicide, no as a means to end it but just to talk about it, but just want my suffering and inner torment to end soon, it is mentally exhausting and tedious, no plan as yet but I am looking into methods and the most sure fire way with the least pain, I am utterly useless I think so can't afford to fail like I have at everything else

 

[WornOutLife]

Great question. If I did my best I could have a wonderful life so, I guess I just wanna die (in recovery now)

 

[Arrow]

i probably do not deserve to die, but i seem to suffer almost all of the time, and i am of no use to anyone else, so maybe a trip back into the void of nonexistence is what i need.

 

[Spiral]

I want to die, not because of guilt, I have always tried my best to care for people and be a good person but I still just can't fit in with society and it's caring about so many things outside of myself that brings me deeper into despair because I can do nothing to fix the suffering of myself or others. I deserve to die because that is my only remaining hope ( I don't ask for much, only an end) since I am both unable and unwilling to follow the path set by modern society and the many years of brainwashing and indoctrination (schools, jobs, advertising, social norms and etiquette) have failed to work on my weird brain. I am below rock bottom and the way out is either to climb an insurmountable mountain and jump through hoops to achieve a lifestyle I don't want or be homeless or die. The latter is by far the least painful choice. So I say both, I want and deserve to die

 

[lifesucksxoxo]

I am a convicted pedophile, and I'm going to face a minimum of 4 years prison here in Australia. I've already been in prison for 1 year a few years ago. I'm 26 so I might be in my mid 30's when this is over, which is still a lot of time left, but I don't think I have any hope of experiencing more happiness than pain. I had a normal life and was growing up just fine before, and now it's just a vicious cycle to becoming more and more estranged.

So I'm pretty serious about ending my life, there just isn't much point left anymore. I am causing my parents more pain every day while I am alive.

Looking around, I don't want to downplay people's problems, but honestly most of you people seem pretty normal and in situations that aren't permanent, or aren't heinous or a fault on your own.

Were u falsely convincted? What happened?

 

[wanttodie]

I just want to die,

 

[newave3]

I don't deserve to die, no fukin' way. I have my nasty moments but I consider myself to be a good person.
Today I go down to my car to shovel it out from 24 inches of snow and find the side view mirror cracked. The exhaust system is getting loud too....more money to spend. Also today,I had to get a brain MRI which is hell for me due to claustrophobia. Then a filling fell out in one of my molars.... even more money to spend. I know some of this stuff seems minor compared to other people's problems but I consider today one of my good days ! FUCK LIFE !

 

[Life_and_Death]

The exhaust system is getting loud too....more money to spend.

Quick fix, depending on what specifically the problem is. Have you tried putting a tin can on it? I'd have to ask my husband exactly how but I remember him telling me it's a cheap quick temporary fix.

 

[imsorrythatimhere]

Both. Not gonna say the things I've done, but the damage involved in them is irreversible. Other than that, life's pretty shitty and I'm just not cut out for it

 

[newave3]

Quick fix, depending on what specifically the problem is. Have you tried putting a tin can on it? I'd have to ask my husband exactly how but I remember him telling me it's a cheap quick temporary fix.

Yes, I have done that in the past but like you said it is only a temporary fix. Eventually, I will up end going to a muffler shop and spend the money. BTW, the car is 33 years old and I am the original owner but I have a sentimental attachment to it. Never get emotionally attached to inanimate objects. Thanks for your suggestion.