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voc_89

voc_89

Experienced
Apr 10, 2023
238
my brother walked in on me cuting myself. It was around 7 a.m. I wasn't in a good space and i thought cutting myself would help calm some of my anxiety. Given the time and the fact that my brother (the only person who lives with me.... in our apartment) always sleeps in I decided to just cut myself in the kitchen area (knives are always what i use to cut myself). Suddenly I hear... 'what are u doing'.... my world came tumbling down. I froze. I just threw the knife in the sink and said 'I don't wanna talk' and went back into my room. I have some alcohol in my room. So I am going to drink myself silly. To sleep. But I know this is going to balloon. I think my family thought I wasn't suicidal anymore (some may recall I indicated that I wrote a letter planning to end my life in 2005.... which my father found).... but this won't go away just like that and I dread having to discuss my mental frame with my family.
 
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