• Hey Guest,

    An update on the OFCOM situation: As you know, censorship around the world has been ramping up at an alarming pace. OFCOM, the UK’s communications regulator, has singled out our community, demanding compliance with their Online Safety Act despite our minimal UK presence. This is a blatant overreach, and they have been sending letters pressuring us to comply with their censorship agenda.

    Our platform is already blocked by many UK ISPs, yet they continue their attempts to stifle free speech. Standing up to this kind of regulatory overreach requires lots of resources to maintain our infrastructure and fight back against these unjust demands. If you value our community and want to support us during this time, we would greatly appreciate any and all donations.

    Read more about the situation here: Click to View Post

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

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Could someone deter you from CTB with advice?

  • 18-24 age group: Yes, they probably could.

    Votes: 9 5.4%
  • 18-24 age group: Maybe.

    Votes: 38 22.6%
  • 18-24 age group: No. I've already considered my options and know what I want.

    Votes: 37 22.0%
  • 25-35 age group: Yes.

    Votes: 9 5.4%
  • 25-35 age group: Maybe.

    Votes: 12 7.1%
  • 25-35 age group: No

    Votes: 28 16.7%
  • 36+ age group: Yes.

    Votes: 5 3.0%
  • 36+ age group: Maybe.

    Votes: 8 4.8%
  • 36+ age group: No.

    Votes: 22 13.1%

  • Total voters
    168
F

Forveleth

I knew I forgot to do something when I was 15...
Mar 26, 2024
1,526
Personally, I am 40+. I have tried therapy and medication to no avail. I got here from a goggle search on methods after my (then) latest attempt failed. I have been suicidal for decades. There is nothing anyone can say to me anymore to change my mind.
 
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P

Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
12,148
In my case, it'd be "pretty easy" to save me but only giving advice isn't enough bc I've heard (and I've already known) all advice on what I should/can do to get out of the hole (it's still not that easy!) but everything is subject to failure that will ultimately lead to me falling deeper into the hole and CTB.

Maybe (36+) but it needs more than just advice.
 
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Pluto

Pluto

Cat Extremist
Dec 27, 2020
4,606
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Shadows From Hell

Shadows From Hell

The one who has lost a lot, fears nothing.
Oct 21, 2024
334
Nah. No matter how much they try, it won't stop me. I'll be 55 in a couple weeks. I've seen everything I needed to see regarding life. I've had my ups and downs, my good and bad, happy and sadness.... I'm finished.
 
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billie

billie

take me back to the night we met
Mar 31, 2024
559
i'll ctb and no one will be able to stop me not even the most important person in my life
 
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ringo99

ringo99

Arcanist
Apr 18, 2023
469
I'm 37. I've gone as far as I can. Any hope I had of salvaging my life and career is gone. Too old and too tired to care. There's nothing for me to look forward to except loneliness, poverty and homelessness. My death will be more useful to those around me than if I continue to live on.
 
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S like suicide

S like suicide

Enlightened
Apr 29, 2021
1,540
No,it is too late...I have reached a level so inhuman that there can only be death.
 
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The_Hunter

The_Hunter

Hunter. PMs always open.
Nov 30, 2024
293
I know that my daughter, who died by suicide, came here specifically looking for information about methods, which she found here. In her last message on this forum she thanked everyone because she found the info very helpful.

I agree with what you're saying: I think there may be a lot of people who come here because they've made up their mind. In one of her farewell messages my daughter stated explicitly no one could have stopped her. As a mom I find it irritating too, that people who choose to end their life are depicted as 'there must be something wrong with them,' and they should just call a suicide hotline.

There was a reason my daughter didn't call a helpline.

She wasn't looking for thát kind of help.

So, as a mom of someone who died by suicide I'm finding this place soothing in a way, because there's room to talk about this without all the judgement and advice to go and call for help as defined as suicide prevention.
My sincerest condolences. That is a truly abyssal loss. I hope you are able to feel healing from that tender pain you feel from such grief. May you be soothed.

I've never experienced grief myself, but, I found this comment on this forum to be a touching account of the nature of grief; and I hope it might soothe you, too.

It wasn't your fault. Sometimes things happen and we don't know what happened. I am sure you were a very caring and loving mother who did everything she could to make her daughter's life as peaceful as it could be. I know for sure, that your efforts were not completely futile; that she did feel the positive benefits of your works, that she was able to experience good things thanks to you.

I cannot imagine what it must be like to experience this. My strongest wishes with you. May her memory be a blessing.

--Hunter
 
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quietism

quietism

We make our own wind
Feb 3, 2025
75
A good friend could change my mind. But they wouldn't be doing it through telling me to survive, definitely.
 
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Permanoir

Permanoir

Member
Dec 29, 2024
96
There is nothing that could change my mind. My problems are permanent and some out of my control
 
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R

rian 69

Member
Feb 11, 2025
33
I've just read a very well meaning post by a member going through some suggested things to try before seriously contemplating suicide. Here is the post:


I think it touches on a lot of good points and a lot of reasonable suggestions. I know personally, I'm not at the stage where I would willingly take advice though. I'm curious as to whether other people think their mind could be swayed.

I suppose pro-lifers would like to see that in response to all venting posts. Don't contemplate suicide. Go to the gym, try multiple medications, try multiple jobs, go for a walk, volunteer, talk to a therapist, get a life coach.

I think we do make suggestions to people when they are asked for. For the rest of us though- Would we try these things now? How willing are we to listen to advice? Ultimately- do you think your mind could be dissuaded- if you are settled on suicide now?

I suppose in my mind, I feel like someone who deliberately joins a forum entitled 'Sanctioned Suicide' likely didn't come here specifically looking for recovery advise. Although, we do of course have the recovery section. Perhaps I'm wrong though. I can only go by my own experiences. Other people trying to fix my problems now would irritate me if I'm honest though.

I'd argue though that a lot of people have likely made up their mind before joining the site. My point in emphasizing this is out of annoyance that we're often labelled as some cult that draws people in and brain washes them. It may be painful to realise but, why do people think their loved ones go looking for suicide resources in the first place?

I've split the survey into age groups out of curiosity. How malleable are our minds/ decisions?
I've been around. I would say no one but me can decide. Not outside advice. Am 69 and tried everything literally that is suggested. I'd also note that plenty of people here will never do or at least not for a long time. They are here for different reasons like I've had ideations for decades but found this cause I'd hoped there'd be some simple,peaceful ideas that I hadn't seen or thought of. But again I venture from what I've seen in my short time here that the vast majority of folks here don't need talking out of anything now. There just exploring or looking for interaction with people who at least get them and their situation that "normal brained" people just can't comprehend.
 
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Hojag

Hojag

But only for you.
Jan 11, 2025
80
Some people do come here for the pro-death philosophy, or to simply have a place to talk about their mental health without risking hospitalization.
Yes, that's a more accurate explanation to why I'm here. I know, it will never be the same for everyone.

My main reason to join, after hesitating years ago, was the fact suicidal thoughts consume me - and talking to my loved ones about the details of such things just hurt them more.

Also, I was sick to hell from listening people on Reddit/Discord/EVERYWHERE saying "go seek a therapist", when I'm going through therapy as long as I can remember. For real, that "trauma dump" speech made me ill and now I'm here. And guess what? This site, ironically, helps me to carry this weight.

Why I'm here? Because people are unable to empathize with others. They don't give a fuck and it's much easier for them to cut you off, leading you to a "suicide site". The lack of empathy in this world is the reason why I'm here; it's from mankind's nature to only care about themselves and only give a fuck when the problem affects them.

Their basic protocol when spot a low self-esteemed being:

"Don't talk to anyone, don't spread your negativity. Seek a therapist -which you already have - and, after that, seek a therapist. We are not free therapists, so seek one therapist for each day of the week to throw all your junk away. And don't blame me, the essay I wrote calling you a useless piece of shit is just part of society; if you can't handle being told to die, get some help X``D."

Hell, they still wonder why? SaSu improved my chances of survival. Now, for these guys telling us to seek a lot of therapists or curious reporters peaking here to say it's a death cult website:


Get some help. [%^)
@before20 Oh, sorry. My comment should have been sliced. I didn't mean to tell you to seek a therapist or anything. Sorry for attaching my rant to you.
 
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nomoredolor

nomoredolor

Specialist
Sep 7, 2024
370
Why I'm here? Because people are unable to empathize with others. They don't give a fuck and it's much easier for them to cut you off, leading you to a "suicide site". The lack of empathy in this world is the reason why I'm here; it's from mankind's nature to only care about themselves and only give a fuck when the problem affects them.
The lack of empathy breaks my heart and makes me feel like I don't belong here. My loved ones say "but you're so good for this world." And I say "but this world is not so good for me."

You deserve to be treated better.
And don't blame me, the essay I wrote calling you a useless piece of shit is just part of society; if you can't handle being told to die, get some help X``D."
🫂❤️‍🩹
Hell, they still wonder why? SaSu improved my chances of survival.
That makes me happy
 
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manicstreetbeeper

manicstreetbeeper

just trying
Feb 14, 2025
53
well they say suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem, but if that temporary problem is suffocating you and nobody cares then maybe for me it's worth it.
 
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natthebrat

natthebrat

only help i want is with ctb
Jul 9, 2023
187
if my gf or another potential gf wanted me to be a housewife, or if a game i made became really popular overnight, maybe
 
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Hojag

Hojag

But only for you.
Jan 11, 2025
80
The lack of empathy breaks my heart and makes me feel like I don't belong here. My loved ones say "but you're so good for this world." And I say "but this world is not so good for me."

You deserve to be treated better.

🫂❤️‍🩹

That makes me happy
Thanks for the words! I know the amount of pain that haunts you now, so it's so kind of you to take your time to reply my post here.

For real, you deserve peace and everything I said on our PMs. And you know what? Even strangers here can change my mind, because of that one thought I have of bearing the memories of those who couldn't stood the pain of this life.

I'm actually feeling good (numb/high by meds) right now! Hope you are doing well and don't feel the need to answer my messages. Take your time and rest first, always!
 
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Reflection

Reflection

Thank goodness for the good souls
Sep 12, 2024
398
If my ex gf came back and wanted to fix things then yeah, that's the only thing that could lift away all the pain. I don't think any advice could do anything, I already exhausted all other options.
 
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MsHelena

MsHelena

Missing my cats
Jun 20, 2024
10
I have 24/7 chronic pain, as the crash tore part of my spinal cord out of the back base of my brain and I just found out that from the car crash I have progressive arthritis in my backbone that came on, and I have always said that if and when it was a no go as far as daily life goodbye, HOWEVER if I would get someone in my life, then the equation could change, as I fully believe in the aspect that we are ALL in this together, and I would listen to the wishes of the other person.

Walter
I just want to say as someone with spinal cord injury/ disease, arthritis and 24/7 chronic pain: I empathize with your description very much, and I am very sorry it's something you are enduring now.

I suppose I might feel the same if I had someone in my life. I don't feel safe enough to allow that to happen since becoming disabled, but I support others in their openness to love, and the vulnerability it requires.
 
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human909

human909

Banned
Dec 30, 2024
594
Only one person can maybe change my decision but that's very unlikely for me since i am 95% sure i will do it.
 
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I

IronMed

New Member
Mar 2, 2025
2
Never . I will never want any kind of life / existence/ consciousness

I will never see an objective reason for why I have to live another minute or for why I have to want to live another minute

No one could ever change my mind about killing myself asap nor about anything I posted

I have never even seen anyone say a valid reason for why I have to live another minute or something that validly negates even one thing I have posted.
First time I have read something that reflects my exact thoughts. I don't care about "going home" nor anything that has to do with any form of existence. What's holding you back from going? Just curious
 
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pthnrdnojvsc

pthnrdnojvsc

Extreme Pain is much worse than people know
Aug 12, 2019
3,168
First time I have read something that reflects my exact thoughts. I don't care about "going home" nor anything that has to do with any form of existence. What's holding you back from going? Just curious
fear of failing a suicide attempt and remaining alive with brain damage. but trying to find a way to getting over the fear of failure not of Death. if Death was guaranteed or at least 99,9% i would do it today or in a few days after i take a few things like decluttering, will etc.
 
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sximii

sximii

meow
Dec 4, 2024
159
I put maybe but most likely not. Even if they do in that moment the feeling will come back. I have BPD so I'm chronically suicidal
 
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Gl1tch3d G1rl

Gl1tch3d G1rl

My mom must've had a virus coz I was born a glitch
Aug 10, 2021
1,513
Had my past been different, then maybe. But sadly that's not the case so no. I will 100% ctb one day.
 
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grapevoid

grapevoid

Arcanist
Jan 30, 2025
483
Idk I answered maybe because I guess it COULD be possible but I find it very unlikely and I'm not even sure if there is anything that would actually convince me to not.
I've just read a very well meaning post by a member going through some suggested things to try before seriously contemplating suicide. Here is the post:


I think it touches on a lot of good points and a lot of reasonable suggestions. I know personally, I'm not at the stage where I would willingly take advice though. I'm curious as to whether other people think their mind could be swayed.

I suppose pro-lifers would like to see that in response to all venting posts. Don't contemplate suicide. Go to the gym, try multiple medications, try multiple jobs, go for a walk, volunteer, talk to a therapist, get a life coach.

I think we do make suggestions to people when they are asked for. For the rest of us though- Would we try these things now? How willing are we to listen to advice? Ultimately- do you think your mind could be dissuaded- if you are settled on suicide now?

I suppose in my mind, I feel like someone who deliberately joins a forum entitled 'Sanctioned Suicide' likely didn't come here specifically looking for recovery advise. Although, we do of course have the recovery section. Perhaps I'm wrong though. I can only go by my own experiences. Other people trying to fix my problems now would irritate me if I'm honest though.

I'd argue though that a lot of people have likely made up their mind before joining the site. My point in emphasizing this is out of annoyance that we're often labelled as some cult that draws people in and brain washes them. It may be painful to realise but, why do people think their loved ones go looking for suicide resources in the first place?

I've split the survey into age groups out of curiosity. How malleable are our minds/ decisions?
I agree. People came looking for this site for a reason, and likely were already suicidal. And if it gives them better options, it doesn't mean they wouldn't have ctb anyway, just maybe now in a less gruesome or traumatic manner.

Additionally, I also saw that list and I think my first feeling was annoyance but there are a lot of young people on this site and so I can see why this could be useful advice. Reading through it I felt like .. obviously I have tried all of these things. I'm an adult, I know how to "fix" a bad mood or bad days or how to turn my situation around when things aren't going right in life…but none of those things get rid of my desire to ctb. Even when my depression "symptoms" are otherwise under control, I am still extremely suicidal only less emotional about it. lol
 
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Alo the obvi alien

Alo the obvi alien

Planner
Jun 20, 2023
460
I suppose pro-lifers would like to see that in response to all venting posts. Don't contemplate suicide. Go to the gym, try multiple medications, try multiple jobs, go for a walk, volunteer, talk to a therapist, get a life coach.
If only it was that easy in America. I feel stuck in the loop of being mentally disabled but not mentally disabled enough for disability. So I have to work, but I can't mentally work 40 hours a week without going manic and quitting because I'm so fucking stressed. That means I can't get meds because even with insurance they were still hundreds of dollars that I couldn't afford. And same with therapy. I am drowning in debt I don't want to think about. I can't afford the gym, I'm too paranoid for just walking around with everyone having phones out secretly recording everything, I'll never know when someone might make me the next meme. I'd volunteer but that's just add to work stress. I just can't function and when I did have meds for a few months, it was okay for two months but I noticed it didn't help after awhile, anyways. Im helpless. I always was unwanted. And I was never liked nor understood. I just don't see a point in living if I feel like I will never be surrounded by people that understand me.
Other people trying to fix my problems now would irritate me if I'm honest though.
Yeah, the pro-lifers on this site sometimes pisses me off. Like I wish they stayed on the recovery section if they cared so much. They don't seem to understand that their "help" causes more guilt and shame than anything. Like its just easy to live with the constant loop of SI. Normal people dont want to drop off a cliff at the end of they day, and they will never understand that. They say they do, but they don't understand the difference between a saying and the actual feeling. Normal people think SI is just saying you want to CTB but in not just saying it. Its the entire ferling throughout the mind and body. It's a constant heaviness and tingling that just makes me want to drop dead or SH.
 
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