• New TOR Mirror: suicidffbey666ur5gspccbcw2zc7yoat34wbybqa3boei6bysflbvqd.onion

  • Hey Guest,

    If you want to donate, we have a thread with updated donation options here at this link: About Donations

H

Heavenbound

Specialist
Apr 11, 2023
304
Granted: but she is 600 pounds.

I wish I could go to a spa.
 
epic

epic

Enlightened
Aug 9, 2019
1,814
Granted bur there are piranhas in the pool.

I wish I could rock climb
 
sadsadsack

sadsadsack

wannabe dj
Mar 26, 2023
78
granted but sylvester stallone is with you the entire time

i wish i was a baller
 
H

Heavenbound

Specialist
Apr 11, 2023
304
Wish granted, but you will never get taller...

I wish my town had a disco.
 
pilotviolin

pilotviolin

Student
Jan 27, 2024
152
the disco only plays country music, nothing else

i wish for a juicy burrito
 
  • Like
Reactions: narval
narval

narval

Enlightened
Jan 22, 2020
1,188
The genius mistakes the meaning burrito (food) as the diminutive of donkey (in spanish: donkey --> burro. Little donkey --> can be written as burrito)

So... Good luck dealing with a horny donkey.

I wish a beer
 
  • Like
Reactions: raincereal
R

raincereal

Member
Mar 13, 2024
22
granted but the beer has no alcohol content

i wish i could travel into different universes
 
  • Yay!
Reactions: narval
tearymishu

tearymishu

Entrapped in vines, far away.
Mar 16, 2024
10
granted but you're always experiencing it as a random, everyday inanimate object (i.e a chair)

i wish i could control my appearance !
 
  • Aww..
Reactions: Yuki_03
dweams

dweams

i feel tired…maybe I’ll get wings
Feb 26, 2023
116
Granted, but your personality will forever be unattractive and repulsive, causing your peers to shun and avoid you. You will then live your life completely alone until the day you die.

I wish I could eat as much as I want without ever gaining weight.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Little_Suzy
Little_Suzy

Little_Suzy

Amphibious
May 1, 2023
770
Granted!
All you eat is solid food, and the only liquid you are allowed to drink is water from the toilet! Lol

I wish I had a free unlimited Uber Eats account.
 
  • Wow
Reactions: Yuki_03
Yuki_03

Yuki_03

I really can't take it
Aug 9, 2023
353
Your wish is granted!!!!
But, oh..., you cannot get anything but bananas in your account :(
But at least u have illimited bananas!!!! U could conquer the world with monkeys :D

I wish get all the knowledge past, present, and future about the whole universe
 
narval

narval

Enlightened
Jan 22, 2020
1,188
Granted, but at the cost of going irredeemably crazy. Mortals can't hold so much knowledge, how dare you?


I wish being happy.
 
ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

death will be my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
2,406
Granted: but you will spontaneously and uncontrollably laugh at random, yet frequent amounts of time. After all you never stated just how happy you wanted to be!

I wish that my next wish cannot be corrupted
 
  • Love
Reactions: narval
narval

narval

Enlightened
Jan 22, 2020
1,188
Edit: i read wrong :(
I said nothing
You get nothing. The wish isn't corrupted, it doesn't need tho

I wish i could travel in time


Granted: but you will spontaneously and uncontrollably laugh at random, yet frequent amounts of time. After all you never stated just how happy you wanted to be!
But i'm happy, right? :)
 
Last edited:
ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

death will be my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
2,406
Edit: i read wrong :(
I said nothing
You get nothing. The wish isn't corrupted, it doesn't need tho

I wish i could travel in time



But i'm happy, right? :)
I said that my next wish wouldn't get corrupted. I never said that my current wish cannot. Also, yes, you would be happy.. manic even

New wish:
I wish that soon as I finish the last word of this wish, I will be dead immediately, painlessly and I will be permanently non existent for all eternity and never come back from the state of permanent non existence
 
  • Like
Reactions: narval
Yuki_03

Yuki_03

I really can't take it
Aug 9, 2023
353
Granted!!
But in your happiest moments as a cat, your owner dies. Maybe you get to be a stray cat or get another owner, but who knows id they'll treat you well.

i wish that every person i wanted would get their heads exploded :) that would VERY nice
 
tearymishu

tearymishu

Entrapped in vines, far away.
Mar 16, 2024
10
granted!
but everyone who you exploded in your lifetime will come back to haunt you! too many and maybe YOUR head will explode! (figuratively) :3

i wish i could be someone's reflection! (like in a mirror, or in a puddle.)
 
terra.nuvo

terra.nuvo

Member
Feb 15, 2024
91
granted! But you are the reflection of a serial killer and you must witness gruesome muders

I wish I could travel through time as I desire
 
sserafim

sserafim

brighter than the sun, that's just me
Sep 13, 2023
7,365
Granted
But you can only go back to your worst moments.

I wish I could read and control minds.
 
Last edited:
Little_Suzy

Little_Suzy

Amphibious
May 1, 2023
770
Granted!!!

You can only read minds and control events that occurred 30 days earlier.

I wish my car could self-drive (gas-free, of course) with a 100% perfect safety record.
 
One day too late

One day too late

eMOTIONally dAAAAAAmaged
Aug 14, 2020
3,536
Granted
But the car got a mind of its own.

I wish I'm fast as the Flash.
 
W

wCvML2

Member
Nov 15, 2021
218
Granted
But your tracks pollute a ton of toxins into the air when you use your super-speed ability (like car exhausts)

I wish for the ability to have infinity storage in my pockets
 
I

idkwhatimdoinghere

Abandoned account
Mar 13, 2024
122
Granted, but your pockets are laced with honey so everything is sticky

I wish for the ability to travel anywhere I want without spending any money
 
leavingthesoultrap

leavingthesoultrap

(ᴗ_ ᴗ。)
Nov 25, 2023
1,006
Granted, but you always catch a stomach bug while abroad.

I wish to never feel exhausted
 
  • Like
Reactions: Galahad
G

Galahad

Member
Mar 21, 2024
67
Granted but you can never leave your bed other than for the bathroom


I wish I was in a fulfilling and loving relationship
 
I

idkwhatimdoinghere

Abandoned account
Mar 13, 2024
122
Granted, but its with a zombie

I wish I could see into the future to avoid mistakes
 
G

Galahad

Member
Mar 21, 2024
67
Granted but for every mistake you avoid you also serve a positive life event

I wish I had 10,000 bitcoin in a custodial wallet
 

Similar threads

latte art
Replies
3
Views
103
Forum Games
LoiteringClouds
LoiteringClouds
D
Replies
9
Views
147
Offtopic
Praestat_Mori
P
mochamochi
Replies
2
Views
145
Suicide Discussion
YosemiteGrrl
Y
CocoToxBase
Replies
18
Views
555
Suicide Discussion
Tesha
Tesha