K
kionu09
Member
- Jun 3, 2023
- 52
It's been almost a year since i poste goodbye thread. Life has been a shifted for me in last april 2024. A smart handsome kind guy suddenly became someone wants to kill himself. Death was the only thing i can imagine of and my only focus in last year. I believe if this site wouldnt exists ı would attempt suicide. After i found this site i learned that CTB is not something easy as holyood showed us. I was still in a death wish but had more knowledge about pain methods risks permanent injuries pysch wards etc. I spend my entire summer for collecting items needed : SN method. Read every goodbye thread posted witnessed and been an online companion to the ppl CTB'ed (rest in peace Wizzy) . By the end of september I was ready, had everything required (everything u can imagine from benzos to scheduled mails..) But appereantly ı find relief little bit knowing that i can perfom it anything in urgent necessity-calmness came then.
I never revealed why my turned upside down to anybody even to my family closest friend colleagues even in SaSu. Real thing is i was accused with the crime i never commited by my ex-gf (god damn her soul)- sexual assault. I was taken into custody 1 night went into trial next day released but with foreign travel ban and obligation to weekly signature at police station until the next trial. It was hell literally worst 6 months ever. Normally i had nothing to fear since i am innocent but the things are not that smooth in my country, especially with this kind of crimes. ı ve been trialed for 18 years of imprisonment. Simply death seemed much better than this. I was thinking like i should never ever go to that trial which to be held in october.But somehow i managed . The day has came. I told everything to the Judge and backed up my defense with my evidences. First trial concluded on favor of mine all restrictions held off. I was free then. Next trial was at february ı even not went to that one my lawyer called me and said that i have been found innocent from all of my charges
I felt like a bird at that moment it was like my constant suffocation ended and was able to breath the real air again. Soon i realized SaSu banned in my country didnt delete my account ever but not logged in either.
Time has passed now i am recovered even better than before went to gym put off 15 kgs. found a new job in EU one of the top empleyers in a classy position it never felt better before..
I want to thank you everyone and every soul in this journey of mine. Thank you for keeping me alive and and in one piece. I want to encourage everyone on the recovery path: things get better and remember what does not kill you makes you stronger
I never revealed why my turned upside down to anybody even to my family closest friend colleagues even in SaSu. Real thing is i was accused with the crime i never commited by my ex-gf (god damn her soul)- sexual assault. I was taken into custody 1 night went into trial next day released but with foreign travel ban and obligation to weekly signature at police station until the next trial. It was hell literally worst 6 months ever. Normally i had nothing to fear since i am innocent but the things are not that smooth in my country, especially with this kind of crimes. ı ve been trialed for 18 years of imprisonment. Simply death seemed much better than this. I was thinking like i should never ever go to that trial which to be held in october.But somehow i managed . The day has came. I told everything to the Judge and backed up my defense with my evidences. First trial concluded on favor of mine all restrictions held off. I was free then. Next trial was at february ı even not went to that one my lawyer called me and said that i have been found innocent from all of my charges
I felt like a bird at that moment it was like my constant suffocation ended and was able to breath the real air again. Soon i realized SaSu banned in my country didnt delete my account ever but not logged in either.
Time has passed now i am recovered even better than before went to gym put off 15 kgs. found a new job in EU one of the top empleyers in a classy position it never felt better before..
I want to thank you everyone and every soul in this journey of mine. Thank you for keeping me alive and and in one piece. I want to encourage everyone on the recovery path: things get better and remember what does not kill you makes you stronger