Are you not plagued with regret?

[Ambivalent1]

I don't see how I can ctb while plagued with regret despite how much pain I'm in.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I am plagued with regret and it's just adding on to my need to CTB.

 

[divinemistress36]

Everyday since birth

 

[MisterOGBongWater]

My regrets have led me to this very post. My regrets haunt me every time i wake. My regrets feel more alive than i do. I am my regrets.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I've got all kind of regrets. My life, especially since adulthood, has been one regret after another. But, that's not to say that I didn't have regrets in my youth, too, because there were plenty.

 

[LaughingGoat]

Are you talking about the type of regret like how it will effect other people or just general regrets?

 

[feelinggloomy]

My regrets are numerous and they run deep and are one of the reasons I'll CTB.

 

[Artemisia]

Sorrow, not regret. Given the same curcunstances, I would have done the same. So, I'm sorry that those were the curcunstances, but I do not regret my decisions.
Also sorry that doctors failed me and left me to suffer physically. I'm sorry I'll have to die long before expected. I'm sorry, so sorry it turned out this way. That's a far more intense feeling to me that any regrets I may have.

 

[Ambivalent1]

Everyday since birth

What did you regret at birth? Lol

I am plagued with regret and it's just adding on to my need to CTB.

You can die while experiencing horrible emotional pain? I can't. I need to feel at peace at the end.

I am plagued with regret and it's just adding on to my need to CTB.

You can die while experiencing horrible emotional pain? I can't. I need to feel at peace at the end.

Are you talking about the type of regret like how it will effect other people or just general regrets?

General

 

[Pluto]

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

You can die while experiencing horrible emotional pain? I can't. I need to feel at peace at the end.

I presume the peace will come from the comforting thought of ending the emotional pain I'm in. At the very least I don't plan to CTB impulsively. It will take weeks maybe months of careful planning in order to be carried out so even if there is constant emotional pain from my regrets I might as well keep it as fuel.

 

[Ambivalent1]

I presume the peace will come from the comforting thought of ending the emotional pain I'm in. At the very least I don't plan to CTB impulsively. It will take weeks maybe months of careful planning in order to be carried out so even if there is constant emotional pain from my regrets I might as well keep it as fuel.

Fuck, man. I'm normally numb so emotional pain is largely uncharted territory.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Fuck, man. I'm normally numb so emotional pain is largely uncharted territory.

There's no real solution to acclimating to emotional pain outside of getting used to it by having it happen over and over which feels impossible and not worth it even if it did happen.

 

[TDF]

This is a very complicated question that I have been thinking. I deeply regret a lot of things that happened, but I'm not sure I had much control over the outcomes. The decisions I made, like trusting and marrying my ex, living overseas for him etc etc, whilst were in hindsight very bad decisions that led me here today, I don't regret them in the sense that with what I knew at the time I think I did the right thing. Obviously if I know what I know now I wouldn't have done it, but with what I knew at the time I stand by what I did. I don't think I've done anything morally corrupt or bad against someone in my life, I would regret that if I had. I regret not having discovered mental health issues sooner I guess, but again it's hard to say I didn't already do the right things with the information I had, I've never been suicidal before and even then I did go seek therapy and take medication as I had thought I may be a little depressed, and really no professional thought I had any serious problem. They didn't pick up anything. I don't know, I certainly do regret having failed my marriage but at the same time I genuinely did try my best, I tried so hard. I do also regret staying despite my ex really abusing me, but again at the time I still think I did the right thing, he made it seem like it was all my fault and I wanted to fix things I didn't want to give up, yet I didn't know how the abuse would have impacted me afterwards. I guess there are a lot of regrets, and I am deeply plagued by regret. but I also don't know what else I could have done, I still standby my decisions and actions, but it seems to not lighten any of my distress, it merely makes everything more confusing.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Not really. I feel like I largely did the best I could under the circumstances. I think we make the decisions we do for a reason. Sometimes, things in our life just feel too big to get over and we take the 'safer' route.

That's not to say I haven't behaved in ways I regret or feel embarassed about. I've been and continue to be selfish. I've also behaved rudely or embarassed myself frequently.

Again though, there are reasons behind that which I don't take full responsibility for. I think I'm selfish in part because I've felt like to some extent, people have abandoned me- so- I've done the same back.

I also just sank myself into a coping mechanism at the exclusion of everything and everyone else- mainly though again- because it proved to be more reliable! Sadly and unfortunately though- it meant that I did neglect people who did do a lot for me- which I do deeply regret. That doesn't feel very forgiveable considering how much they did for me.

Plus, I have really cringy memories where I must have come across rude or ridiculous because of social anxiety. That's more embarassment though- rather than regret.

Major decisions in life though? No. I probably made some unwise choices from time to time. Most of mine have been careeer related. Still- we don't get the benefit of hindsight- we just have to go on what we know and feel at the time.

What is it you actually regret? Why did you or didn't you make the decisions you made?

 

[abchia]

I don't feel regretful for anything right now.

During times that I would typically feel regret for my actions (that led to a negative outcome for myself), I direct it towards myself and start to think that I deserved it, so I stop regretting my decisions. If its something that hurt someone else, after a while I don't feel regret for that either because I end up thinking that that's who I am, that I'm not a good person or that all I'll ever do is hurt people. It's the negative mindset of "it is what it is" which also causes me to feel numb a lot of the time.

 

[divinemistress36]

What did you regret at birth? Lol

You can die while experiencing horrible emotional pain? I can't. I need to feel at peace at the end.

You can die while experiencing horrible emotional pain? I can't. I need to feel at peace at the end.

General

Coming out of the womb

 

[Ambivalent1]

Coming out of the womb

I wish I had done what Ashton Kutcher did in The Butterfly effect. He went back to utero and strangled himself

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I don't have any regrets. I only wish that I wasn't born to begin with

 

[Ambivalent1]

Not really. I feel like I largely did the best I could under the circumstances. I think we make the decisions we do for a reason. Sometimes, things in our life just feel too big to get over and we take the 'safer' route.

That's not to say I haven't behaved in ways I regret or feel embarassed about. I've been and continue to be selfish. I've also behaved rudely or embarassed myself frequently.

Again though, there are reasons behind that which I don't take full responsibility for. I think I'm selfish in part because I've felt like to some extent, people have abandoned me- so- I've done the same back.

I also just sank myself into a coping mechanism at the exclusion of everything and everyone else- mainly though again- because it proved to be more reliable! Sadly and unfortunately though- it meant that I did neglect people who did do a lot for me- which I do deeply regret. That doesn't feel very forgiveable considering how much they did for me.

Plus, I have really cringy memories where I must have come across rude or ridiculous because of social anxiety. That's more embarassment though- rather than regret.

Major decisions in life though? No. I probably made some unwise choices from time to time. Most of mine have been careeer related. Still- we don't get the benefit of hindsight- we just have to go on what we know and feel at the time.

What is it you actually regret? Why did you or didn't you make the decisions you made?

Yeah the safer route. I've missed many chances with women because of fear of some kind And random memories of old embarrassments. i have avoidant personality disorder too.

My main regret is with women I had chances with and rejected. Other regrets are things that i didn't know would become regrets. I made the best choices I could given the information I had available. And I "regret" the way my life has played out but I couldn't undo the trauma I endured as a child and the mental issues that stemmed from it so my life couldn't have ended up any different really. But that's not comforting. Just makes me angry that I can't be normal.

 

[Tinkerer]

I find peace in being able to ctb. Yes, I have many regrets, but removing myself from the equation just makes it so that I can't build up any more. Besides, once i'm gone, I won't be able to reflect on any mistakes or hurts I've caused.

 

[Ambivalent1]

I find peace in being able to ctb. Yes, I have many regrets, but removing myself from the equation just makes it so that I can't build up any more. Besides, once i'm gone, I won't be able to reflect on any mistakes or hurts I've caused.

That's interesting. To continue living means acquiring more regret to obsess about.