Are you 100% sure you're going to ctb?

[Cursed4ever]

Yes By Tomorrow

 

[Breadbfra]

How do I answer to this when I truly hate being alive and I can't tell how much I want to kill myself, but the only thing I don't want is to give my girlfriend another suicide grave to cry on? Ffs I'm not sure but I'm sure at the same time.
I even started to smoke and drink hoping for an hearth attack

 

[Myforevercharlie]

I think one of the few who wants to stay and life out my life, despite of everything..

 

[Wheelz1985]

Yes 100%

 

[Swoods]

Yes, I am sure.

 

[Ramirez]

thought it was gonna be it last month. love how my cowardice keeps me in this shithole (not). gotta make it out though.

 

[MariV]

im much less sure since i joined this forum. the paradox. the vibe is so good, the stories so interesting, the discussions so profound, the people so emphatetic...its a great distraction amd relief

Yes, there's no hope for me. I'm so socially disabled I will never liberate from the yoke of this loneliness. I don't have anybody and there's no chance I will ever. I've been struggling with depression for 14 years. Fucking 14 years of sobbing, being beaten and abondoned. 5 different antidepressants, therapy, even mental hospital (oh my god, polish mental hopsitals are worse than the prison! Literally! They are not helpful at all!) and there's still no hope. I've done everything I could. It lasts way too long. The only thing I regret is that I didn't ctb earlier.

sry...u rly dont deserve that

 

[Dude1983]

Ill die by suicide, thatss for sure, because i preffer the death ill give to myself than the death fate has planned for me. The question is if ill do it next week, month, or next years

 

[allym101]

I feel like it's inevitable at this point. No matter how many times I "recover" I keep getting trapped back into the thought. When I leave this world, I plan on doing it with my own hands.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I have some hope, but I remain doubtful. Either way, I have a 99% chance of ctb'ing after I turn 30. That 1% chance is if my life does turn around in the next 3.5 years and even that seems a little too high of an estimate.

Alright, make that 99.99% odds to ctb. At the time I made this post, I had told myself that the next person I get my hopes up for would be the last and well, looks like the last finally came. The 0.01% is on the off-chance I get the courage/stupidity to reach out to her again AND it works out successfully between us. :L

 

[Masonfight]

Yes I am 150% sure. Unless there's an accident or something else I will kill myself

 

[Lmd]

I prefer something cooler like dying exorcised or in a martial arts duel fighting for my honor, but everything points out to me dying in my bed for SN. If anyone wants to change my destiny and fight me in the top of a mountain or helping me summoning a demon PM me ty

 

[lighthousekeeper]

99% sure, I only say that because sometimes I can be unpredictable

 

[MiseryLovesMyCompany]

As my life is going right now I see less and less chances for me not to. However, nothing is completely sure in life but death (and taxes).

 

[TripleA]

100% that i will try to ctb in this year

 

[MichaelNomad123]

I'm not certain. It will probably never be a certainty for me. I have been telling myself it is a certainty for about 16 years now and I still keep going. That's not to say that I didn't come close, of course. I suppose what stops me from making it an absolute certainty is that I probably have a high tolerance for suffering. I always have hope in some capacity, because I lowered my expectations to the point that I could probably continue existing with nothing but the clothes on my back. I have spent the majority of my adult life by myself and while that is cause enough to ctb, you kind of get used to it. It becomes a friend.

I'm facing another conundrum as I get older, in addition to my perpetual suffering. The longer I live, the more violent I feel and the more rotten my morality becomes. This flies in the face of a lot of my core values as a human being, so it's very distressing. This new problem is more of a solution really, which is to say that I should probably just do it before I hurt someone.

 

[UpsidedownStar]

I'm completely certain that I'll be the one to take myself out of this world. Sooner or later. It may be not happen today, or next week, or next month or even next year, but I know I will be the one to cause my own death.
It's almost comforting.

 

[Theodora]

Right now .. I'm like can everything I want to watch hurry up so I can Finally die

 

[Numbtopain97]

Yes.