Apologies

[howunfortunateforme]

I wanted to apologize to everyone here bc I've been such a spaz and annoying to most. I have no where else to turn to. I was supposed to be gone by now multiple times, but plans changed or I chickened out or wasn't left alone. You are all such kind and caring people and I'm been all over the place. The mind of a suicidal person. I could use a little bit of help in regards to success stories of tbose who weren't alone for sn. I am unable to get a hotel and can only do it with family in the house tney are on another floor of the house which is good, but worried I'll be heard. I really have no other option, I am never alone. Input, I was supposed to be gone by now…that n itself is depressing. I appreciate all of you so much you have no idea.

 

[nails]

we haven't talked much, but you do seem like a great person and you have no reason to feel sorry. i understand what it's like to have your plans ruined over things that you can't control, so i understand the guilt you're feeling; but it's not your fault.

i hope you find some sort of peace soon. i'm not very good at responding, but feel free to reach out if you need someone to talk to.

 

[reverieheart]

None of this is easy, and I get why you feel all over the place. It sounds frustrating to have been ready so many times but never fully able to go through with it. I get the worry of being heard as well. I live in a house of 5. Maybe timing it when there's background noise, like a TV or shower running, could help? My preferred method is also SN. If you ever want to talk, just to be heard, I'm here for that too. Whatever you decide, I wish you peace.

 

[Light_]

It's the hardest thing to do esp if you never wanted to. Maybe you can get better. You've come this far, maybe you'll get better in a few years, or less. Good luck

 

[howunfortunateforme]

Can anyone weigh in on benzos before or after sn or both and why? If you're going to vommit? Why would you want to throw up benzos?