To be honest @timetodie24 I perceive you as a very honest, eloquent and intelligent man. I have doubts whether you are actually evil. I really like you man. You are quite sympathetic to me.
You know my take on you. Talk with a doctor about your thoughts of mind control. I had psychosis and I was 100% convinced that I was not psychotic during that time. Actually the conviction that you are 100% sure it is not psychosis is more or less a sign it could be psychosis. I wish I could help you to realize that. But we are only strangers on the internet and I cannot force you to do anything. I hope you manage to find a way out of this without killing yourself. I hope for the best...Sadly, I cannot do more for you.