Shiva_Story
Student
- Mar 12, 2023
- 134
I'm almost 40 and I lived a life that had its ups and downs.. studied, worked a lot, made a bit of momey in crypto, excersized enough to not only lose weight but apex my male physique.. ever since i finished school friends were harder to come by and keep.. i accepted my lone wolf lifestyle and embraced it for the good the freedom and statted travelling. Meeting other cultures has made me grow spiritually more than anything else. That and psychedelics.
Although i live in a tropical paradise with breathtaking nature there is nothing i could get my human creature excited about.. no prospect of future.
For years i have been propelled by the idea that in country like the Phillipines i'd be able to find a girlfriend and have a chance at developing a love based relationship. I am giving up on that bcs no female would date me, they all seem like theyre not really there..avoiding eye contact homo vegetable style and if theyre there their intellect seems super basic and are an instant turn off. I discern that natures plan is connection yet i fail to connect to anyone beyond mere service industry, in the shop when i check out or when i order food. My human creature is hungry for Love and i dont know how to get it for it. The only place it gets better is in nature. I dont want ro love like this and had it with my life. I've concluded that most sensible thing is moving on and CTBing. Im actually looking forward to it.
No longer required to eat, drink, breathe, sleep, shit and engage with this illusionary world.. how liberating!
Although i live in a tropical paradise with breathtaking nature there is nothing i could get my human creature excited about.. no prospect of future.
For years i have been propelled by the idea that in country like the Phillipines i'd be able to find a girlfriend and have a chance at developing a love based relationship. I am giving up on that bcs no female would date me, they all seem like theyre not really there..avoiding eye contact homo vegetable style and if theyre there their intellect seems super basic and are an instant turn off. I discern that natures plan is connection yet i fail to connect to anyone beyond mere service industry, in the shop when i check out or when i order food. My human creature is hungry for Love and i dont know how to get it for it. The only place it gets better is in nature. I dont want ro love like this and had it with my life. I've concluded that most sensible thing is moving on and CTBing. Im actually looking forward to it.
No longer required to eat, drink, breathe, sleep, shit and engage with this illusionary world.. how liberating!
