
darkenmydoorstep
Not Waving But Browned Off….
- Sep 27, 2023
- 623
For me it's never about tying up loose ends or hanging around for a person or pet.
It's never about having people tell me they value me or just holding on in case things improve.
The reason I never do it is for one reason only.
Because I'm too fucking scared.
Because the means I would have to go to to successfully finish the job are too gruesome and brutal.
That is literally the only thing that keeps me here. And god I wish I wasn't such a wuss.
I despise having to live here and bar perhaps an Interval when all totted up of about six months, I have done for the last 35 years.
I really hope I get my shit together soon and sort this soon. Other people manage it. Even kids - not condoning that btw just makes me feel even more of a loser that I can't bring myself to do it.
It's never about having people tell me they value me or just holding on in case things improve.
The reason I never do it is for one reason only.
Because I'm too fucking scared.
Because the means I would have to go to to successfully finish the job are too gruesome and brutal.
That is literally the only thing that keeps me here. And god I wish I wasn't such a wuss.
I despise having to live here and bar perhaps an Interval when all totted up of about six months, I have done for the last 35 years.
I really hope I get my shit together soon and sort this soon. Other people manage it. Even kids - not condoning that btw just makes me feel even more of a loser that I can't bring myself to do it.