NSFW wish i had a girlfriend..

[meowpuppy]

title. i just, really want a girlfriend, i think it'd be pretty neat. i'm tired of being unlovable, i'm tired of having an imaginary girlfriend in my head who has to soothe me everytime i sleep. i just, want a real girl. a flesh and blood girl, not even a girl through the internet. i just want to wrap my arms around a beloved every night and sleep well.. it's not even about the sex anymore, like, sure, i'd enjoy losing my virginity, but i hate the fact i don't at least have some kind of love. isn't this what we're all supposed to have? i have a masturbation addiction as well, so..

..all hopeless dreams, of course, because i live in a terrible place. unironically might never find another out and about lesbian, at least here, and most of them will be pretty transphobic, so i don't expect them to date me. i wish i could just stop pining about girls but it'll never happen. it's like asking a starving woman to stop fantasizing about food.

my mental would improve so much but it's just not in the cards for me. and i live with my parents, because, fuck my life, i guess, so i probably would have to struggle with that.. but those same mental problems are why few girls would even be friends with me, let alone date me. i'm just generally needy, in every type of relationship, because i've been deprived of so much, and i want to make up for, what, somewhere around a decade of realizing my family doesn't really love me?

obviously, i don't want advice on how to date women. if you thought that was what this post was about...

 

[Kokonoe]

i can really relate to how you feel. i'm also a gay tgirl and i'm so tired of feeling unlovable, too. anything other than dying alone feels impossible to me. it feels impossible to meet anyone in my circumstances, even just platonic friends. i'll die never being loved by any of my friends or family or anyone. it's just miserable.

 

[meowpuppy]

i can really relate to how you feel. i'm also a gay tgirl and i'm so tired of feeling unlovable, too. anything other than dying alone feels impossible to me. it feels impossible to meet anyone in my circumstances, even just platonic friends. i'll die never being loved by any of my friends or family or anyone. it's just miserable.

lots of love, i hope i can at least find a partner before i kill myself, but i know that would be pretty unfair to them..

 

[Kokonoe]

lots of love, i hope i can at least find a partner before i kill myself, but i know that would be pretty unfair to them..

good luck with that girlie. personally i've given up hope of finding anyone before i ctb :p

 

[mutsu]

i can really relate to how you feel. i'm also a gay tgirl and i'm so tired of feeling unlovable, too. anything other than dying alone feels impossible to me. it feels impossible to meet anyone in my circumstances, even just platonic friends. i'll die never being loved by any of my friends or family or anyone. it's just miserable.

omg hello my fellow gay tgirls

i relate very hard to the whole feeling unlovable thing, i feel like as a bpd girlie someone needs to put in so much effort to love me that its kinda not worth it i suppose

ive also kind of given up on any real love before i ctb too i mean i suppose it would be unfair to the other person anyways

 

[meowpuppy]

omg hello my fellow gay tgirls

i relate very hard to the whole feeling unlovable thing, i feel like as a bpd girlie someone needs to put in so much effort to love me that its kinda not worth it i suppose

ive also kind of given up on any real love before i ctb too i mean i suppose it would be unfair to the other person anyways

hii!

what you say about bpd is pretty relatable because, frankly, any hypothetical girlfriend will spend most of her time cuddling me in bed, if we were to ever hang out, because i'm bedridden with anxiety.. i wonder if it's ever worth it for me either. i'm also polyamorous, so the thought of having multiple flesh and blood girls just sitting around my bed makes me feel like such a sore.

if you're okay with me asking, are you coping with your lack of romance in any way? like my imaginary girlfriend? or are you just sort of suffering?

 

[Kokonoe]

omg hello my fellow gay tgirls

i relate very hard to the whole feeling unlovable thing, i feel like as a bpd girlie someone needs to put in so much effort to love me that its kinda not worth it i suppose

ive also kind of given up on any real love before i ctb too i mean i suppose it would be unfair to the other person anyways

omg hello fellow gay tgirl :3

i also have bpd so i completely get it. that + DID makes me feel like i am just 100% not worth the effort for anyone. and to be honest i just would feel bad for anyone unfortunate enough to love me. even i don't like dealing with my own disorders lol, i don't want to inflict that upon anyone else.

and yeah i feel like it would be unfair to my potential partner since i feel so set on ctb-ing anyways. but i feel like i would at least still try to give it a shot even if it's selfish of me because i would always rather try for the potential to change than to never have given my life a shot to get better.

 

[mutsu]

if you're okay with me asking, are you coping with your lack of romance in any way? like my imaginary girlfriend? or are you just sort of suffering?

i am technically dating someone at the moment but theyre currently in the psych ward for uh beating me and searching through my pc while i was in pain from getting hit

theyve also sa'd me and restrained me unconsensually so its kinda not the greatest relationship (im trapped and can't leave due to certain circumstances for a while)

i yearn for love that is not abusive i just want someone that won't hurt me

but yeah as for now i am kind of just suffering through it trying my best to like exist i guess

omg hello fellow gay tgirl :3

i also have bpd so i completely get it. that + DID makes me feel like i am just 100% not worth the effort for anyone. and to be honest i just would feel bad for anyone unfortunate enough to love me. even i don't like dealing with my own disorders lol, i don't want to inflict that upon anyone else.

and yeah i feel like it would be unfair to my potential partner since i feel so set on ctb-ing anyways. but i feel like i would at least still try to give it a shot even if it's selfish of me because i would always rather try for the potential to change than to never have given my life a shot to get better.

omg i have DID too!! it really does feel like its impossible to be loved as much as i love others,,, im wishing the best for you girlies

 

[meowpuppy]

i am technically dating someone at the moment but theyre currently in the psych ward for uh beating me and searching through my pc while i was in pain from getting hit

theyve also sa'd me and restrained me unconsensually so its kinda not the greatest relationship (im trapped and can't leave due to certain circumstances for a while)

i yearn for love that is not abusive i just want someone that won't hurt me

but yeah as for now i am kind of just suffering through it trying my best to like exist i guess

omg i have DID too!! it really does feel like its impossible to be loved as much as i love others,,, im wishing the best for you girlies

so real.. i feel like i'm just somebody who's destined to only bring in abusive partners. of all my partners, only one was abusive, but i feel like all i'm going to do now is just bring in more abusive partners.. i hate it, i hate everything..

wishing the best. hopefully we can all find lovers, and not be rotting. also, nice to see somebody use ,,, at the end of sentences like i used to.

 

[mutsu]

so real.. i feel like i'm just somebody who's destined to only bring in abusive partners. of all my partners, only one was abusive, but i feel like all i'm going to do now is just bring in more abusive partners.. i hate it, i hate everything..

wishing the best. hopefully we can all find lovers, and not be rotting. also, nice to see somebody use ,,, at the end of sentences like i used to.

omg yay a fellow,,, user

i wish the same upon you, i hope things go oh so well!! and if you ever want to talk my dms are open!

also i relate to your bio so hard ive always had to just accept the fact that ill never be loved in the way i love someone else