Will you be honest in your note?

[DesperateOne]

Wil you tell your loved ones everything? Why you are the way that you are, your inside world and why you chose to take such a drastic decision. If you were neglected as a child, will you be honest and lay out in your letter what caused the beginning of your downward spiral or will you just wish them the best and leave them with positive thoughts? I've been thinking about it and it feels like hiding the truth about your life is bad. Altering reality just to make other people feel good seems spiritually abhorrent.

 

[amra81nz]

Not everything. just things that related to them i think. i cant see them understanding my inner thoughts once im gone if they cant while im here

 

[Malaria]

Yeah, I think I'll say everything in my note. That's why, if I were to write or type out a note, I would take a while. It'd probably be a novel at that point, but I think it's important to lay out everything that's happened in my life and be very clear on why I'm deciding to take my life. I'd have to say everything, even the most uncomfortable traumas in my life that I haven't told very many people.

 

[sserafim]

I actually don't want to write a note lol. I'm ambivalent about if I'll have one or not. I think that not writing a note is also a form of protest, just like ctb itself is

 

[Namarupa]

I plan to keep it short, clarifying that I took the decision to end my life rationally, not out of spite. Don't see much of a point in writing beyond that.

 

[JOkE2109]

I wrote one, it's super short and I decide not to touch on any of my reasons beside saying it isn't their fault. It really sucks to talk about my reasons and I only get more and more reasons the more I think about it, my thoughts on it are always changing too.

 

[mrscat]

I am being honest in all my letters. My decision is not related to them, Luckily I had a "normal" childhood and it is about my depression that has been with me for more than 25 years. I love my mother and sister and I don't want they suffer. Same with my ex husband who was with me until the end. I am leaving short notes to some friends also. I also explained in them that my passing will be quickly and not painful. I know my people and my decision will bring consequences to their lives, so I will try to minimize the impact in them..but it depends of the case, anyways do the best you feel about about the notes

 

[Alexei_Kirillov]

Yes, if I am dead then I have nothing to lose in being honest. Also, I want to do what I can to minimize their pain, and I think helping them understand will be useful in that way. I won't explain the background of my decision to CTB in my Note itself though, I'll just give them access to my journal. I couldn't do justice to everything that's happened in a brief few pages -- nor do I want to, as I believe that the scope of my Note should be very narrow, just focusing on the logic behind my decision, but not how I arrived at it.

I actually don't want to write a note lol. I'm ambivalent about if I'll have one or not. I think that not writing a note is also a form of protest, just like ctb itself is

Protest as in, "Existence is optional, therefore I owe you no explanation"? Or do you have something else in mind when you refer to it as a form of protest.

 

[sserafim]

Yes, if I am dead then I have nothing to lose in being honest. Also, I want to do what I can to minimize their pain, and I think helping them understand will be useful in that way. I won't explain the background of my decision to CTB in my Note itself though, I'll just give them access to my journal. I couldn't do justice to everything that's happened in a brief few pages -- nor do I want to, as I believe that the scope of my Note should be very narrow, just focusing on the logic behind my decision, but not how I arrived at it.


Protest as in, "Existence is optional, therefore I owe you no explanation"? Or do you have something else in mind when you refer to it as a form of protest.

Yeah as in existence is optional and no one could consent to it, so I don't need a justification as to why I want to leave this world. I want to protest society, capitalism and life itself by ctb. Sometimes the best explanation is no explanation. I kind of want to leave things unfinished

 

[perfumeonmyneck]

Yes, because I don't want anyone to think it was their fault that I'm dead. I wanna give closure so they can hopefully move past it faster even if it means I give a whole essay on the "why?". I mean I'll be dead there's nothing to lose in that. It won't be another thing that keeps me awake at night because it is dramatic or embarrassing.

 

[bipbapbop]

I probably wont leave one but if I do I definitely won't be honest. I don't hold any resentment towards the people who have hurt me so I wouldn't want them to feel guilty about it. My life might be over but likely they will have to live with it for many years and I wouldn't want them to carry that burden.

 

[tronix]

No, I don't want to leave a note. I don't think anyone would care. Also, it wouldn't explain anything. Might be even more painful for some.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Interesting question. I think I'll be honest to a point. I'll say I've wanted this (suicide) for a very long time but I was holding on for the people I felt wouldn't get over it to pass first. (True.)

The actual truth would be- this all came about initially because of the (suspected) narcissist in my youth. Everything pretty much went haywire after that. Both good and bad but, mostly bad. The 'good'- the coping mechanism was ultimately maladjusted and doomed to eventually fail. But, I suppose as an adult, I could have made more effort to take a more stable path- so- that bit's on me.

But anyway- I think they know. Some of my oldest friends certainly know. Not sure there's any point rubbing salt in a wound. The damage has been done.

 

[steppingoff]

Wil you tell your loved ones everything? Why you are the way that you are, your inside world and why you chose to take such a drastic decision. If you were neglected as a child, will you be honest and lay out in your letter what caused the beginning of your downward spiral or will you just wish them the best and leave them with positive thoughts? I've been thinking about it and it feels like hiding the truth about your life is bad. Altering reality just to make other people feel good seems spiritually abhorrent.

I am not sure I can so I probably will not leave a note.

 

[Fktw0rld]

I won't leave a note. My lifeless body will be honest enough.

We as individuals think a lot of ourselves, meaning our level of importance to those who choose to be around us, family, friends, etc. It's human nature. But truly I tell you, as heartfelt as any last note may be, no one will take it as emotionally as it was written. Unless your note gains the attention of law enforcement pertaining to any specific individuals, depending on your situation. But even then, it would have to be discovered by them before being destroyed.

 

[gantaigarashi]

Yes, because I don't want anyone to think it was their fault that I'm dead. I wanna give closure so they can hopefully move past it faster even if it means I give a whole essay on the "why?". I mean I'll be dead there's nothing to lose in that. It won't be another thing that keeps me awake at night because it is dramatic or embarrassing.

Same for me.

 

[FuneralCry]

If I had a reliable plan to die in peace and was going to write a note then yes I would, I'd explain how I chose to end my existence on my own terms as existing is completely undesirable in every way possible, I'd explain how I had no interest in suffering in this meaningless existence and how it's better for me to not exist.

 

[cantthinkofusername]

i dont think my family would understand but they deserve an answer so yes id be honest

 

[Return2themoonlight]

In my note, I wouldn't tell them the reason as that would require putting blame on people I don't want to feel guilty and traumatized although that would be something I have little to no control over. The only thing that would be in my note would be how sorry I am for taking this action. It would just be filled with apologies and how it was because I'm not strong enough for life. The reasons behind my actions would be things they already know, whether it be in the open and already known or something in the back of everyones mind. Either way, I would just be sorry for going through with it instead of trying to work it out. No blame or explanations as that would be something they would already know.

 

[trashprincess]

Not really. The people who hurt me won't understand what they did wrong, there's no point trying to explain. To everyone else, I don't want them to feel responsible. What I will be honest about is...

Everything I've ever done wrong, in hopes it will turn people against me.

That I want everyone in my life to move on and be happy, especially the ones that hurt me.

 

[Deleted member 65988]

No amount of words I'd convey in a note could ever make up for the unfolding questions they'd have after so all I've left are instructions and hopefully, they'll follow through.

 

[brokeandbroken]

Wil you tell your loved ones everything? Why you are the way that you are, your inside world and why you chose to take such a drastic decision. If you were neglected as a child, will you be honest and lay out in your letter what caused the beginning of your downward spiral or will you just wish them the best and leave them with positive thoughts? I've been thinking about it and it feels like hiding the truth about your life is bad. Altering reality just to make other people feel good seems spiritually abhorrent.

There's nothing to tell and therefore no note. My anger, hurt, and pain they already know, they just don't care. To be honest I don't think my death would have any impact. They know how I feel. I think it may actually be a relief for them.

 

[Trakehner]

I will say whatever I feel is necessary. It's my last opportunity to express myself.

 

[untothedepths]

I don't know if I will write one. If I do, it will be a short story's length. And the people I want to really want to yell at may even have passed already. And to the people I love, I feel like I have let them down demonstrably. I don't tend to directly harm people, but my luck has of the past decade really has collateral.

 

[dogbreath]

yes i will be honest. Ofc i will write about how some people are just meant to die and its survival of the fittest, but most importantly ill write about how i hate my brother. I have a big family and I have a younger brother that i fucking hate. Parents and siblings are sad that im distant from him and think I can change and be kind to him but no, genuinely hate him and if he died from natural causes I would not be sad lol. Like I love my sisters I do but for some reason i cant stand him lol. family thinks i can change but no I dont want to.

 

[xoirse]

yup. i don't think there's any use in lying anymore when i am out of this world anyway, i wouldn't worry about what they think about me anymore due to the peace i will be receiving when i go and then maybe wish them the best in the end of my note. i think it's best to just finally say whatever you want and how you feel in the end to at least release some of the heavy weight and struggles you've been feeling throughout everything before you ctb. finally being able to say what you truly feel without the constant overthinking and worrying about what they think about you because you'll finally be at peace. i'll keep it brief and short though, i don't wanna dump everything seeing as to what's the point as they probably wouldn't understand how i feel anyways. i don't think they are interested in hearing what i have to say but i think i owe it to them for being a part of my life lol

 

[scottyy]

I always ask myself this too. I think it would leave them even more damaged than if I just silently left. But at the same time I kinda want tell them that they're actions have consequences.

 

[bugs_for_brains]

originally I wanted to try and clarify and explain as much as I could but I came to the realisation that im never gonna be understood to the extent that I hope to be because its physically impossible unless someone shares my brain. So I'll probably give a shallow explanation so my family feels like they've heard my reasoning and stuff (bc I hope that will be helpful in their recovery). Should be ok because they already know I have depression, anxiety, autism so I can easily just give a basic ass recap of those and nothing else (life events, times I've been hurt by them, etc)

 

[dinosavr]

No, I'd definitely mention "hoping to see them again" because I know they are very religious and after all the note is for them, not for me. I want to do my best and cause as little harm as possible.
Obviously I do NOT hope to see them again. If I end up in another life after this one I'd probably kill myself :')