Venting Will hopelessness continue forever?

[oniichan]

I just don't know what to do at all. I feel like as of late, and for the majority of my life, I have reached such a strange level of detatched-ness that I can't get past. I only feel happy when deluding myself, and when unable to, it's all hopelessness all over again. I feel like I'm missing what it means to be human, and all I want to do is CTB, but I'm too mcuh of a pussy to attempt again, because I just remember how much it hurt when I failed the latest time I atttempted. I just wish everyone would leave me alone and that I could live in a dark hole for the rest of my life, because at least then, I'd be rid of the shackles that contributing to society has left me with. I'm just so tired.

 

[8hsjyd]

I'm sorry to hear of your situation. To answer your question, though, it's simply not possible to ascertain and predict the future entirely. Life is full of possibilities both bad and good. Despite this inherent unpredictability, one nevertheless at least has the ability to make efforts which incline the future towards themselves, even if it's only somewhat and even if enacting those efforts is difficult. While I'm not aware of your specific circumstances, it's perhaps worth stating that mistakes are often capable of being remediated (or at least moved on from), one's character can change and improve, new friends are waiting to be made, and material circumstances can be made better.

 

[oniichan]

I'm sorry to hear of your situation. To answer your question, though, it's simply not possible to ascertain and predict the future entirely. Life is full of possibilities both bad and good. Despite this inherent unpredictability, one nevertheless at least has the ability to make efforts which incline the future towards themselves, even if it's only somewhat and even if enacting those efforts is difficult. While I'm not aware of your specific circumstances, it's perhaps worth stating that mistakes are often capable of being remediated (or at least moved on from), one's character can change and improve, new friends are waiting to be made, and material circumstances can be made better.

I suppose so. You put it all so well, too. I'm really thankful for your words