Why haven’t you committed suicide yet?

[throwaway123]

Mostly im afraid of the afterlife and what happen if there is one. thats pretty much the only reason.

 

[ExRN]

Failed 4 times already. Thought each time would be the last, but need to make sure it looks like an accident now. I wanted to go peacefully but now I need some serious courage to end the pain I've been suffering for way too long.

 

[nomorepainss]

Fear is the main reason, but the truth is we got a chance to choose our end unlike others.

 

[nitroautnz]

Failed 4 times already. Thought each time would be the last, but need to make sure it looks like an accident now. I wanted to go peacefully but now I need some serious courage to end the pain I've been suffering for way too long.

did you use the same method every time?

 

[Wheelz1985]

I think it's because most of us can die anytime. We keep the suicide card in our back pockets. As for me I'm waiting to see if these anti depressants will do any good.

 

[Tonight634]

Hmm...I'm scared of death, SI kicks in everytime I try...Also deep down I hope things will get better even though they've been getting worse and worse every day, then I don't wanna die alone, and the last thing id that there are days when I really love life but I just hate myself so in the end I can't enjoy it fully anyway

 

[ExRN]

did you use the same method every time?

No, I tried 4 different methods over the past 2y.

 

[Niirvana]

Fear is the main reason, but the truth is we got a chance to choose our end unlike others.

Rip.

 

[Harleyyy]

I don't have the resources to.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I've said this multiple times but I want to wait until I'm 30 in case some miracle happens. Hopefully by then all media I currently enjoy will have declined too so I won't have to worry about that.

 

[Amumu]

I don't want to hurt my family, and I'd like to see nieces or nephews grow up, earn some money, do some drugs and have libido.
Maybe if I had a girlfriend (but it's very unlikely), I would change my mind as well.

 

[SuicideBoys93]

She needs me like I need her. I'm not religious but she has been heaven sent in my life.

 

[dss262]

Use of firearm was my go to and it has the highest success rate but there are those who fail because they flinched and blew out the neck or blew their faces off. You have to hit certain parts of the brain, otherwise the lights stay on.

 

[FuneralCry]

Because suicide is very difficult. If it was easier, I would be long gone. Of course all humans are programmed to survive, we want to die but it goes against our instinct to survive. I think for me it is also the fear of failure. Methods can go wrong and can lead to damage. The society denies us access to peaceful methods meaning I have to resort to one that is very unpleasant. I believe a certain mental state is needed to actually go through with it, at least for me, I think I will need to reach a point of complete desperation. Overall, death is very comforting to me and it is what I look forward to. I just wish it was easier to get there.

 

[Starryeyes]

Started a 12 week DBT course and I'm two weeks in. I'm crying much more, self loathing much more, and generally feeling really fucking shitty about myself and life. I thought this was meant to help :(

 

[Wingspan]

Can't figure out how to get to the train that goes to beachy head, and even then I will be up against insurmountable survival instincts caging me back into living

 

[TVtrays]

I haven't found an effective method that's accessible to me. Asphyxiation is more difficult than it seems and survival instinct kicks in once I hit that sweet spot. I had SN and meto, but the fear of vomiting (I'm emetophobic) was enough to deter me. I can't obtain a firearm because I've been on a 5150 recently.

 

[After Life]

I don't have access to N or SN right now , on a tight budget due to my low income at the moment. The lack of funds is why I haven't ctb yet. Don't know how i would feel holding N in my hands if my SI would kick in while trying to drink it but that's a problem for another day. One thing I do know for sure is there is no where around misery, pain, sadness or sorrow it's either going to be me that has to go through those feelings every other day by keeping on living or my friends and family when I ctb. I have made peace with that thought, we'll see what happens in the future. Wil make sure to keep you guys updated when the day comes. Until then I will keep on trying to go thru this thing called life one day at a time most of them bad some good days and wait for the time when I can afford N

 

[catdaddy2601]

Coz I'm such a failure in life I even fail at trying to ctb anyway, practise makes perfect, I'm sure most ppl who ctb have had a few unsuccessful attempts...

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

Laziness assembling materials. Procrastination.

 

[dyingalone123]

She needs me like I need her. I'm not religious but she has been heaven sent in my life.
View attachment 45106

that alone makes me want to live!!! :)

 

[cambrai33]

She needs me like I need her. I'm not religious but she has been heaven sent in my life.
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Her eyes have such a beautiful warmth about them. You are both so lucky to have each other

 

[Disappointered]

I'm still working on getting everything I want but I also know that since part of the reason i want to die is that i'm a coward, it might only happen as an impulsive event.

 

[stellabelle]

Failproof measures I guess.

 

[ClownMe]

Im trying my best to hold out until my dog passes away, it's a struggle.

 

[Timeless]

Just going on vacations, do fun stuff (as far as possible with covid19) and after I've spend all my savings I'll go home to the abyss. And kms asap. Probably while I'm on a vacation in my vacation home where no one can find me or bother me. Neighbors are 1km+/about 1 mile away and I see them rarely when there. Private property for the win

 

[The_Dreamer]

Personally, I'm just afraid of failing and ending up as some sort of vegetable. That's really the only reason I haven't suicided already.

I really don't care in the least if my family or friends get sad over my death.

SI and fear. I own a handgun and want so desperately to CTB into an endless peace, and I know that I will have to to save myself from a lifetime of suffering, it's literally logical at this point. But Everytime I point that gun at my head this fear of.... Pain. Of some freakish accident where the bullet just grazes me and I survive in a horrific painful state, this idea just runs non stop despite me knowing it is completely illogical. "What if the bullet is a dud? It only partially ejects and doesn't pierce the skull completely?" Etc etc. It's incredibly frustrating but I believe I haven't been able to conquer it yet because I haven't reached a low enough rock bottom, a true point of no return yet. Not sure how much longer it will take me. A week? A month? A year? Unknown. And that's what kills me even more.

 

[Darkover]

lack of access to drugs to overdose on as simple as that it's the only reason i'm still here someone should set a shop and let the mass exodus begin, i mean if i had access to a pharmacy i'd be able to kill myself easily.

 

[Painless_end]

Personally, I'm just afraid of failing and ending up as some sort of vegetable. That's really the only reason I haven't suicided already.

I really don't care in the least if my family or friends get sad over my death.

Same

 

[Timeless]

Same

I signed a DNR cause of this. If you leave that at your doctor it's by the law protected. If they do it anyway you can sue them and have a almost fool proof case against them. And get enough money to make the next attempt way more fail resistant.
Be safe