Venting Why do people care so much about reaching their full potential?

[ijustwishtodie]

I don't get it. It seems like the majority of humans want to reach their full potential and be the best that they can be. Why? It even seems like a lot of SaSu members here are, or at least were, the same in that regard.

In my case, I never really had much potential to begin with due to my autism but, even so, I know that I have at least some potential yet I never had an interest in reaching it. In fact, I always had an interest in me being in complete inertia... I never wanted to achieve my best because such a thing sounds exhausting to do. If I could spend my entire life rotting away alone, I would. I have no interests in being a machine to do nothing but be the best that I can.

I think that life is too exhausting and demanding from me. Life truly is tiring. I wish I could be dead so that I don't have to work and that I don't have to put any effort in at all. I believe that death is perfect for me because me being dead is the only state where I don't have to work and tire myself out. I'd especially not be forced to achieve my best self by society because there wouldn't be a me to begin with

 

[escape_from_hell]

Agree.
Your special reward for reaching your full potential? Seeing it all go downhill from there.
And likely few people will be impressed, notice, or care. You might even earn some haters.

 

[derpyderpins]

I'm going to do that annoying thing where I suggest a few ideas instead of committing to one:

1. It's a result of societal pressures. (The "machine")
2. The people who raise us (parents or otherwise) believe that seeking our full potential will result in our highest quality of life and therefore push us that way.
3. We are unfulfilled and searching for something to fulfill us. . . maximizing potential is that thing that you can never actually reach, so it gives you something to constantly be chasing.
   • Put another way, it gives us a purpose that will never exhaust itself.
4. We want what comes with it: money, power, fame, attention, approval, sex, love.
5. Who do we hear from in movies, TV, news, media, etc.? People who - seemingly - have maximized their potential and tell us it's great to be like them.
6. The pursuit of our full potential is actually what makes us happy. (Journey, not the destination.)
7. Self-esteem or similar issues.
   • Pressure from the influential people in our lives (eg parents).

 

[Havnis]

I want to reach my love's full potential, because it feels good for me and the other, potential doesn't need to be bounded by society expectations. I don't care about society I only care for one person.

I'm going to do that annoying thing where I suggest a few ideas instead of committing to one:

1. It's a result of societal pressures. (The "machine")
2. The people who raise us (parents or otherwise) believe that seeking our full potential will result in our highest quality of life and therefore push us that way.
3. We are unfulfilled and searching for something to fulfill us. . . maximizing potential is that thing that you can never actually reach, so it gives you something to constantly be chasing.
   • Put another way, it gives us a purpose that will never exhaust itself.
4. We want what comes with it: money, power, fame, attention, approval, sex, love.
5. Who do we hear from in movies, TV, news, media, etc.? People who - seemingly - have maximized their potential and tell us it's great to be like them.
6. The pursuit of our full potential is actually what makes us happy. (Journey, not the destination.)
7. Self-esteem or similar issues.
   • Pressure from the influential people in our lives (eg parents).

That sounds like evil master plan, exploitation with indoctrination.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I've been told plenty of times I have a lot of potential too but I find that just ends up disappointing people more than anything else even when I do make the attempts to live up to it.

 

[Red Moon]

It's just that teachers, parents and staff wanted me to be successful and have a good life in there own words and I was pressured to perform.

I'm going to find it hard to do that because of my neurodiversity and I probably disappointed people when I'm not able to perform to neurotypical standards of society. I let this go nowadays and know that I can't reach my full potential and really fit into society.

 

[Lady Laudanum]

At this point I don't really care what my full potential is. In some ways I didn't reach my goals but in other ways I went above and beyond. I didn't get into a good school for post-secondary and didn't end up studying what I wanted or pursuing the career I wanted. However, I'm in my early 20s and I'm financially comfortable as a result of my own hard work. I don't really care about designer clothes, luxury cars, etc. but having money gives me a peace of mind that literally nothing else can provide.

 

[Alexei_Kirillov]

Could just be Maslow's Hierarchies of Needs, ie. it's a natural consequence of having your base needs fulfilled. Humans can't stay in stasis, they always have to be pursuing something or another, otherwise they'll get bored.

 

[pilotviolin]

im not against the idea just sick of people weaponizing the idea and exploiting it ohhhhhh buy my course ohhhh watch my videos or youre a bad unworthy person just do this do what i say if you do what i say then you can be your best self and if you dont youre bad bad bad focus on yourself but do what benefits me only, if people just admitted their self interest in a neutral way then itd be fine but i see too much of people marketing it as something holy or evil bad good bad good its so complicated its ok to be ok its ok to see what it is its ok

 

[Forever Sleep]

It can bring you a sense of satisfaction. If you happen to enjoy the journey as well. My almost sole coping mechanism in life has been trying to be creative. For a long time, it worked a treat really. I could just lose myself in it and the more you do of something, generally, the more you learn and better you get. Of course- there's the unpleasant side to it too. The frustration when you aren't as good as you want to be. When you aren't as good as other people. Envy isn't much fun. It can spur you on to be better though sometimes.

I think it's different though- when it comes from within. When it's a genuine desire to do something. It doesn't feel so much of a chore then. More like a vocation.

The problem with this world is that so many people can't even utilise what they are best at and enjoy. Unless you're lucky, you can get gifted or rather, cursed with the ability and want to do things that just aren't needed in this society.

 

[Superdeterminist]

I don't believe in missed potential because I believe in determinism. I care about looks, wealth, and accomplishments mostly because of their conjectured importance for succeeding romantically, which is what I care most about. Although, this importance is subject to debate.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

Could just be Maslow's Hierarchies of Needs, ie. it's a natural consequence of having your base needs fulfilled. Humans can't stay in stasis, they always have to be pursuing something or another, otherwise they'll get bored.

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I don't think I'm like that at all. Perhaps I'm an exception. I have always wanted to do as little as possible and that is what would satisfy me. I'm too exhausted with life's demands and how much it wants out of me. If I could do nothing, I would be really pleased. I never had a desire to do things and pursue anything. For most of my life I have deluded myself into thinking otherwise because I couldn't comprehend the idea of an exception to this existing. It turns out that, all this time, I'm the exception

 

[Alexei_Kirillov]

I don't think I'm like that at all. Perhaps I'm an exception. I have always wanted to do as little as possible and that is what would satisfy me. I'm too exhausted with life's demands and how much it wants out of me. If I could do nothing, I would be really pleased. I never had a desire to do things and pursue anything. For most of my life I have deluded myself into thinking otherwise because I couldn't comprehend the idea of an exception to this existing. It turns out that, all this time, I'm the exception

As with any generalized model of human behaviour, there are always going to be exceptions, such as yourself. You're in the minority but there are definitely others in that same cohort.

 

[derpyderpins]

I don't think I'm like that at all. Perhaps I'm an exception. I have always wanted to do as little as possible and that is what would satisfy me. I'm too exhausted with life's demands and how much it wants out of me. If I could do nothing, I would be really pleased. I never had a desire to do things and pursue anything. For most of my life I have deluded myself into thinking otherwise because I couldn't comprehend the idea of an exception to this existing. It turns out that, all this time, I'm the exception

Sounds to me like you're trying to reach your full potential in terms of doing as little as possible. Just how little can you do? You'll never know until you try. I bet if you push yourself you can do even less! jk obv