Why are people struggling with SI called liars behind their backs if they fail but those failures aren't stopping their heart/breathing?

[Idcwhatmynameis]

I've struggled with thoughts of suicide for some time, but I've more often than not managed to talk myself down rather than anything causing injury happening. But most people in the world...seem to not realize that even a failed attempt is something drowning in self-hatred and feeling hopeless an very possibly meaning an internal battle with yourself to STOP the suicidal thoughts from getting their way and compelling you into harmful behaviors.

I'm already mentally/emotionally in tatters and hiding that under pretending that I'm perfectly fine. That I and other suicidal people need a therapist, but we also have to believe that a world that's already classified us as 'difficult' or 'burdens' can accept us and that the fact that we're able to recover and heal, that it's possible to put an end to self-ending beliefs and we're being genuine in our telliNG another person that we've come to recognize the world wishing that anyone who is open about struggling with SI is better off being succcessful, There's one or two people that don't think that way and have no full grasp that most of the world are crueler than that, or that none of us who are in such a dark place are trying to harm those we care abojut....we genuinely believe that our loved ones are better off without our existing because of how much trouble it piles onto their lives.

I need somewhere to talk about this stuff since I don't want to make the gorier details part of having to mention it otherwise;

I

 

[notthatclever]

Damned if you and damned if you don't.. people suck. ignorant, stupid.. no idea what they're talking about.. have you never heard that nobody really loves you until you're dead.. that's when people are magically able to find everything good about you plus get attention for being sad.. as for me I don't care about my family or any I leave behind.. that's not really a major concern of mine.. I don't care how it makes them and feel and put provision in my will to that effect.. didn't care about me in life you can't care about me in death..

Suicide tends to bring about the epiphany of certain things about life but of course.. a day late..

Which makes the epiphany superficial.. at best..

And if people can't condemn you from having to think about their own miserable pathetic lives.. what would they have any reason to live for..

That's really all it is why they do it.. damned if you and damned if you don't..

Mark my words though.. those are the very same people that will write insanely
Sad Facebook posts and they miss you so much and why did you this and the rest..

I have a lot of people like that in my life.. as if I haven't had their number all along..

They don't want to weather the storm with you but want a million likes for being fake sad about your death or anything tragedy..

Ironically.. this is one of the only few places I've ever found in life that I find real..

Everything in life is fake.. everybody is fake.. and when you start to mess with that they get uneasy..

A lot more people than you realize can't handle reality.. ultimate reality super real reality.. they pretend they can but they can't..

And it's usually the ones that try to play themselves off and polish themselves off as the realist person you ever met..

I mean everybody rationalizes… just part of human nature.. but they're the queens and kings of it.. and they do it to the tune of delusions almost but playing it off as life..

A lot of people only want to deal with what they deem as an instagram ready version of you..

And they don't understand that's insane in and of itself.,

And you have to ask yourself.. why do you care what they think.. I don't give a fuck what anybody thinks about me.. why should I..

Trust me it's not like they're anything to write home about.. they are just not in the way they'd hope for..

And if you're ready to end it.. not saying you should or shouldn't.. why do you care..

Like that's one great thing about being this way.. once you're really there.. you don't give a single fuuuuuck what anybody thinks..

And you don't.,

They can try to play you any way they want.. just stick to facts as much as possible .. they can't get around that..

That's the premise for most of my shit.. was anything I said not a fact somehow.. ok so why you acting a fool..

You're mad about some facts.. really., sounds like a major you problem then..
Damned if you and damned if you don't.. people suck. ignorant, stupid.. no idea what they're talking about.. have you never heard that nobody really loves you until you're dead.. that's when people are magically able to find everything good about you plus get attention for being sad.. as for me I don't care about my family or any I leave behind.. that's not really a major concern of mine.. I don't care how it makes them and feel and put provision in my will to that effect.. didn't care about me in life you can't care about me in death..

Suicide tends to bring about the epiphany of certain things about life but of course.. a day late..

Which makes the epiphany superficial.. at best..

And if people can't condemn you from having to think about their own miserable pathetic lives.. what would they have any reason to live for..

That's really all it is why they do it.. damned if you and damned if you don't..

Mark my words though.. those are the very same people that will write insanely
Sad Facebook posts and they miss you so much and why did you this and the rest..

I have a lot of people like that in my life.. as if I haven't had their number all along..

They don't want to weather the storm with you but want a million likes for being fake sad about your death or anything tragedy..

Ironically.. this is one of the only few places I've ever found in life that I find real..

Everything in life is fake.. everybody is fake.. and when you start to mess with that they get uneasy..

A lot more people than you realize can't handle reality.. ultimate reality super real reality.. they pretend they can but they can't..

And it's usually the ones that try to play themselves off and polish themselves off as the realist person you ever met..

I mean everybody rationalizes… just part of human nature.. but they're the queens and kings of it.. and they do it to the tune of delusions almost but playing it off as life..

A lot of people only want to deal with what they deem as an instagram ready version of you..

And they don't understand that's insane in and of itself.,

And you have to ask yourself.. why do you care what they think.. I don't give a fuck what anybody thinks about me.. why should I..

Trust me it's not like they're anything to write home about.. they are just not in the way they'd hope for..

And if you're ready to end it.. not saying you should or shouldn't.. why do you care..

Like that's one great thing about being this way.. once you're really there.. you don't give a single fuuuuuck what anybody thinks..

And you don't.,

They can try to play you any way they want.. just stick to facts as much as possible .. they can't get around that..

That's the premise for most of my shit.. was anything I said not a fact somehow.. ok so why you acting a fool..

You're mad about some facts.. really., sounds like a major you problem then..
Damned if you and damned if you don't.. people suck. ignorant, stupid.. no idea what they're talking about.. have you never heard that nobody really loves you until you're dead.. that's when people are magically able to find everything good about you plus get attention for being sad.. as for me I don't care about my family or any I leave behind.. that's not really a major concern of mine.. I don't care how it makes them and feel and put provision in my will to that effect.. didn't care about me in life you can't care about me in death..

Suicide tends to bring about the epiphany of certain things about life but of course.. a day late..

Which makes the epiphany superficial.. at best..

And if people can't condemn you from having to think about their own miserable pathetic lives.. what would they have any reason to live for..

That's really all it is why they do it.. damned if you and damned if you don't..

Mark my words though.. those are the very same people that will write insanely
Sad Facebook posts and they miss you so much and why did you this and the rest..

I have a lot of people like that in my life.. as if I haven't had their number all along..

They don't want to weather the storm with you but want a million likes for being fake sad about your death or anything tragedy..

Ironically.. this is one of the only few places I've ever found in life that I find real..

Everything in life is fake.. everybody is fake.. and when you start to mess with that they get uneasy..

A lot more people than you realize can't handle reality.. ultimate reality super real reality.. they pretend they can but they can't..

And it's usually the ones that try to play themselves off and polish themselves off as the realist person you ever met..

I mean everybody rationalizes… just part of human nature.. but they're the queens and kings of it.. and they do it to the tune of delusions almost but playing it off as life..

A lot of people only want to deal with what they deem as an instagram ready version of you..

And they don't understand that's insane in and of itself.,

And you have to ask yourself.. why do you care what they think.. I don't give a fuck what anybody thinks about me.. why should I..

Trust me it's not like they're anything to write home about.. they are just not in the way they'd hope for..

And if you're ready to end it.. not saying you should or shouldn't.. why do you care..

Like that's one great thing about being this way.. once you're really there.. you don't give a single fuuuuuck what anybody thinks..

And you don't.,

They can try to play you any way they want.. just stick to facts as much as possible .. they can't get around that..

That's the premise for most of my shit.. was anything I said not a fact somehow.. ok so why you acting a fool..

You're mad about some facts.. really., sounds like a major you problem then..