Discussion Why are older people likely to talk random strangers?

[ericwilkinson]

I don't know if anyone has noticed this but I live in Ireland and I'm constantly asked if: 1) I'm Muslim and 2) I'm from Nigeria. It sometimes gets annoying. What is very interesting is that all of these questions are from elderly men.

I've also noticed that younger teen girls sometimes flirt with me and one asked if she could make a call. Interesting also is that no women my age have ever talked to me. I'm not entitled and neither do I expect women my age to talk to a random stranger, after all, I wouldn't unless I needed help.

Just wondering the sociology/psychology of why older men/women are more likely to not just talk but smile at strangers whereas 20yr old men/women hardly do it.

 

[oopswronglife]

Lonely. Older people are just like you in more exhausted and broken bodies. Same worries, fears, insecurities, emotional needs.

 

[SinisterKid]

Because we have had a lifetime of practice fooling the world we are actually ok.

 

[WaterUnder]

Because we are disconnected and forgotten; we appreciate when you speak with us and we apologize for saying stupid shit.

 

[Severen]

A lot of their friends and family members are dead. They are lonely etc...

 

[Ruffian]

Is that an Ireland thing? I feel like in the US in certain areas everyone just speaks to everyone. A lot of us are just rubes in the game of life and we know it on some level. I've always been the kind of person to just turn around and start talking to someone in line. But yeah, you get treated like you're crazy, useless, stupid, and technologically challenged in every way if you speak to someone young most of the time. I went from teaching kids how to use the internet to asking random teenagers how to do something on my iPhone in one lifetime. Imagine the head trip. I'm not stupid, but just the other day an IT person was explaining how to use a browser to me when all I needed was my Print function fixed, which was the REAL problem. You'll understand when you catch up. We do come from an era when people did actually speak to each other. We at dinners together, you didn't have the option to watch TV without commercial breaks, so we talked about the show during the break. The world will be different for you when you're older, and you may be astonished. I know I am constantly in good and bad ways.

 

[inconsequential]

As humans age, especially ones before technology became as huge as it is now, they run out of other humans to talk to. People stop visiting, they stop going as many places, people don't have as much time. So they'll just talk to anyone in public, about anything.

 

[ericwilkinson]

Is that an Ireland thing? I feel like in the US in certain areas everyone just speaks to everyone. A lot of us are just rubes in the game of life and we know it on some level. I've always been the kind of person to just turn around and start talking to someone in line. But yeah, you get treated like you're crazy, useless, stupid, and technologically challenged in every way if you speak to someone young most of the time. I went from teaching kids how to use the internet to asking random teenagers how to do something on my iPhone in one lifetime. Imagine the head trip. I'm not stupid, but just the other day an IT person was explaining how to use a browser to me when all I needed was my Print function fixed, which was the REAL problem. You'll understand when you catch up. We do come from an era when people did actually speak to each other. We at dinners together, you didn't have the option to watch TV without commercial breaks, so we talked about the show during the break. The world will be different for you when you're older, and you may be astonished. I know I am constantly in good and bad ways.

Really? Even young adult women in their 20s?

I've observed that of all the women who've flirted with me, women my age (I'm 21) have NEVER randomly spoken to me. never. There've been school girls who've flirted with me but women my age. I wonder why.

 

[Divine Trinity]

I don't know if anyone has noticed this but I live in Ireland and I'm constantly asked if: 1) I'm Muslim and 2) I'm from Nigeria. It sometimes gets annoying. What is very interesting is that all of these questions are from elderly men.

I've also noticed that younger teen girls sometimes flirt with me and one asked if she could make a call. Interesting also is that no women my age have ever talked to me. I'm not entitled and neither do I expect women my age to talk to a random stranger, after all, I wouldn't unless I needed help.

Just wondering the sociology/psychology of why older men/women are more likely to not just talk but smile at strangers whereas 20yr old men/women hardly do it.

I don't usually mention it but it's mainly technology, right under is relatively low living/working/economic conditions. The powers that be want it so people are isolated from their communities and think they're the black sheep in society.

As far as opposite sex goes, who knows, but women are typically allowed to be much social and intimate (non-sexual) than men.

 

[Final Escape]

Really? Even young adult women in their 20s?

I've observed that of all the women who've flirted with me, women my age (I'm 21) have NEVER randomly spoken to me. never. There've been school girls who've flirted with me but women my age. I wonder why.

It's likely because when women are in early 20's they get hit on constantly especially if they are reasonably attractive. They purposely try to avoid flirting especially if they aren't interested. Many guys mistake interest if a cute girl talks or shows even the most casual interest in them. If u are a different race not all people are interested in dating other races because we are wired to prefer people closer to our own genetics. It tends to work out in relationships easier if u share a similar culture or ethnicity. Nothin to do with racism just biological preferences.

 

[TAW122]

A lot of their friends and family members are dead. They are lonely etc...

Yeah this is one of more common reasons. I remember when I was in the grocery store waiting in line, an elderly man came up and just started to converse with me. He talked about his farm and what he did as a living when he was younger, and various other small talk.

 

[Severen]

Yeah this is one of more common reasons. I remember when I was in the grocery store waiting in line, an elderly man came up and just started to converse with me. He talked about his farm and what he did as a living when he was younger, and various other small talk.

They like to talk to people to reminisce about their youth too. Back when they were young, good looking, healthy and did cool and/or fun things with their time instead of being an old wrinkly bag of bones on death row for the grim reaper(best case scenario, like if they have no horrible physical health problems). The survival instinct is a curse. Just a byproduct of evolution because evolution doesn't give a shit about what happens to people after they accomplished their mission(pass on their DNA) or if they no longer can accomplish their mission, from it's view of point. It's really just a virus infused with people's brains to make sure humanity doesn't disappear...constantly whispering in your ear, do this or do that when you gain nothing from it, in most cases. I like to tell it to fuck off. "Hey buddy, you should have kids!" <- FUCK OFF! "But what about your legacy?" <- FUCK OFF! It's like that U.S. Marines recruiter that would stalk all the upper middle class guys and rich guys who were off to prestigious colleges and universities(all bought and paid for) after the age of 18 with a nice job waiting for them at the end from mommy and daddy's connections when I was in Highschool along with every other guy. Following them into the bathroom to tell them about the opportunities in the Marine Corps during the war in Iraq and Afghanistan. Every time they'd see this recruiter in the hallways, they'd make a run for it. Sometimes, he would show up at their houses...

 

[Kyrok]

Older people are often less insecure and so less fearful of casually picking up a conversation with a stranger. Also, with more life experience, they have more ways to connect with others.

I've noticed my increased willingness to strike up conversations over the years (I'm 53).

 

[Severen]

Older people are often less insecure and so less fearful of casually picking up a conversation with a stranger. Also, with more life experience, they have more ways to connect with others.

I've noticed my increased willingness to strike up conversations over the years (I'm 53).

Well they have had a lot time to build up their confidence, self esteem that was destroyed by their parents, "friends" and other family members when they were children, teens and in their 20s. Some things, heal over time...

 

[Kyrok]

Well they have had a lot time to build up their confidence, self esteem that was destroyed by their parents, "friends" and other family members when they were children, teens and in their 20s. Some things, heal over time...

I agree that's part of it. I'm now much more comfortable with who I am vs how I felt about myself in my teens and 20s.

 

[Severen]

I agree that's part of it. I'm now much more comfortable with who I am vs how I felt about myself in my teens and 20s.

It takes time to purge all the nonsense forced into your brain when you were a kid, a teen and a young adult. And also over time, you accomplish many things and that boosts your self esteem, confidence etc. So most older people, don't really give a fuck what other people think.

 

[Loli]

Loneliness, vision of soon to come death.
I always chit chat with them, sometimes they have really interesting stories to tell.

 

[been_there]

Thanks so much. Dunno what us old folk would do without such charity

 

[azucaramargo]

Lonely. Older people are just like you in more exhausted and broken bodies. Same worries, fears, insecurities, emotional needs.

Yeah, older people are lonelier, and many are desperately eager to maintain social contact. They don't have a lot to do, etc. Their spouses and family members drop like flies... Man, I am NOT looking forward to the geriatric portion of my life.

Really? Even young adult women in their 20s?

I've observed that of all the women who've flirted with me, women my age (I'm 21) have NEVER randomly spoken to me. never. There've been school girls who've flirted with me but women my age. I wonder why.

Maybe they're waiting for YOU to approach THEM.

 

[Ruffian]

Yeah, older people are lonelier, and many are desperately eager to maintain social contact. They don't have a lot to do, etc. Their spouses and family members drop like flies... Man, I am NOT looking forward to the geriatric portion of my life.

Yes, a lot of us are lonely, but for some, like me, that's not a new phenomenon. Being invisible or treated like you don't know how to turn on a computer is way worse. I think I wrote that in this thread before. It's so depressing to have someone tell you how to use a browser when you literally lied your way through every technology question on job interviews and then figured it out for yourself as tech was developing. I still figure most stuff out on my own so I don't have to deal with a 22 year old with no patience. I like the young people on this forum a lot though. They have really helped me understand how depressing the future looks for them. The economy, job outlook, weirdness in romance, gender issues, discrimination, a lot of stuff. Meanwhile, I can't ever remember a time when an older generation wondered why the younger generation never did anything crazy. I have to admit even if I don't ctb right now, I'm glad to be closer to death.

 

[azucaramargo]

Yes, a lot of us are lonely, but for some, like me, that's not a new phenomenon. Being invisible or treated like you don't know how to turn on a computer is way worse. I think I wrote that in this thread before. It's so depressing to have someone tell you how to use a browser when you literally lied your way through every technology question on job interviews and then figured it out for yourself as tech was developing. I still figure most stuff out on my own so I don't have to deal with a 22 year old with no patience. I like the young people on this forum a lot though. They have really helped me understand how depressing the future looks for them. The economy, job outlook, weirdness in romance, gender issues, discrimination, a lot of stuff. Meanwhile, I can't ever remember a time when an older generation wondered why the younger generation never did anything crazy. I have to admit even if I don't ctb right now, I'm glad to be closer to death.

Are you a senior citizen, Ruffian? You certainly don't seem like one from your vivacious posts.

Are you a senior citizen, Ruffian? You certainly don't seem like one from your vivacious posts.

Also, you should be damned proud that you can figure out tech on-the-job. That is cool! BTW, people who are REALLY in the know will NEVER make you feel small for asking questions.
Remember, the younger folks have a totally different relationship to tech than people even just 10 years their senior. Many youngsters get this & feel happy to assist us elders. You sound cool, Ruffian. Don't sweat the small stuff.

 

[Ruffian]

Are you a senior citizen, Ruffian? You certainly don't seem like one from your vivacious posts.

Also, you should be damned proud that you can figure out tech on-the-job. That is cool! BTW, people who are REALLY in the know will NEVER make you feel small for asking questions.
Remember, the younger folks have a totally different relationship to tech than people even just 10 years their senior. Many youngsters get this & feel happy to assist us elders. You sound cool, Ruffian. Don't sweat the small stuff.

No, not a senior citizen, but over 50 qualifies as pretty old in some circles. And I've been running my mouth since I learned words, according to my mom. I also tend to post during manic episodes when everything seems like a great idea, and I want everyone to hear every one of my thoughts and feelings. Thanks for your kind words, though. I think you're so right about tech though, I mean I feel old just by the fact that I watched YouTube when there were no ads. It was such an awakening that anyone with balls and an opinion could amass an audience.

 

[azucaramargo]

It's likely because when women are in early 20's they get hit on constantly especially if they are reasonably attractive. They purposely try to avoid flirting especially if they aren't interested. Many guys mistake interest if a cute girl talks or shows even the most casual interest in them. If u are a different race not all people are interested in dating other races because we are wired to prefer people closer to our own genetics. It tends to work out in relationships easier if u share a similar culture or ethnicity. Nothin to do with racism just biological preferences.

Spoken like a true hottie.

 

[norugrats12321]

I was honestly curious to answer your question as it was something playing on my mind after coming back from the pub alone, until I read;

>I'm constantly asked if: 1) I'm Muslim and 2) I'm from Nigeria

Is that you in your pic? I'm a TIpp man and I can't reconcile why anyone would wonder if you're Nigerian. Like why? Please enlighten me OP.

 

[Deleted member 1768]

I don't know if anyone has noticed this but I live in Ireland and I'm constantly asked if: 1) I'm Muslim and 2) I'm from Nigeria. It sometimes gets annoying. What is very interesting is that all of these questions are from elderly men.

I've also noticed that younger teen girls sometimes flirt with me and one asked if she could make a call. Interesting also is that no women my age have ever talked to me. I'm not entitled and neither do I expect women my age to talk to a random stranger, after all, I wouldn't unless I needed help.

Just wondering the sociology/psychology of why older men/women are more likely to not just talk but smile at strangers whereas 20yr old men/women hardly do it.

They grew up in a time very different from the world we live in today. People were much friendlier and more open then.