When’s the last time you felt good? But like really good, not just ok

[PinkyStat]

As i want to be as annonymous as possible i won't say the name of the game, but it was like a year ago when i beat an exetremely hard level on a game that i have been playing for 2 months from morning to night, I dont really have the determination to do something like that again and i also got tired of the game, so i don't think that i will feel really good anytime soon

 

[Deleted member 65988]

A very long time

 

[Alltheywanted]

Like 2 weeks ago when I was playing some music with my new friend.

 

[kindalone]

The day I knew I was done with high school. Not the day, I got my high school diploma. But rather the day, when I knew there were no assignments, no tests, no nothing. My obligations were over and I could finally be free of this feeling of being judged, measured and evaluated. I could just be me. Lasted maybe a week until I knew I had to soon go to college.

 

[boom.shaka.laka]

Never?

I know that sounds dramatic but I really can't remember ever feeling okay. My mom recently told me I've been this way since I was a toddler. I'm 32 now.

 

[TapeMachine]

I always feel ecstatic whenever I'm in the midst of a hyperfocus, but I haven't had one of those in months...so everything feels bleak, dull..hours feel like days, absolutely nothing interests me or brings me joy.

I'm so under-stimulated that I'd rather die than continue trudging through this desolate landscape in my mind another moment.

 

[Cute_&_Loving]

I guess when I thought I finally found my love and there was a possibility for me to feel loved and a little happy.....

 

[venin]

Never?

I know that sounds dramatic but I really can't remember ever feeling okay. My mom recently told me I've been this way since I was a toddler. I'm 32 now.

Nope. Been close to it, but really really good, no

 

[HonestAbe]

2 years ago.

 

[Unwr!tten]

I only ever feel truly happy when I'm at church or with church friends. I hate being alone.

 

[HonestAbe]

I only ever feel truly happy when I'm at church or with church friends. I hate being alone.

Whatever works hold onto it.

 

[Unwr!tten]

I try everyday, man. I try so hard. I feel like I'm holding onto a cliff ledge and my fingers are tired and bleeding but for some reason, I still hold on.

 

[Baron]

I feel amazing when I cut myself. Thinking about it makes me feel like a freak though

 

[Unwr!tten]

I feel amazing when I cut myself. Thinking about it makes me feel like a freak though

Nah, whatever helps.

 

[jemetire]

This afternoon wow I felt good, now not so much anymore

 

[Unwr!tten]

This afternoon wow I felt good, now not so much anymore

Me when I'm alone

 

[Glandular]

I often think about that question. Since my diagnosis last year I haven't had a good day. But even before then I was feeling the symptoms growing for at least a year ... but at least I wasn't aware that my body will eventually torture me to death. So my last beautiful day without a worry in the world and without all the pain probably occurred in 2021. Maybe even 2019 as Covid times weren't exactly happy either. I guess my summer break 2019 would qualify.

 

[FindingHome]

It's been way to long. I don't even feel like myself anymore. The person I once was is long gone. At this point, I see no return.

 

[DaBassBabyBoom]

The last time I saw my therapist (I just started, with her, I mean) she asked me: when was the last time you felt good? But like awesome, not just ok or not bad or something.

So, when's the last time you felt like that? Or, did you ever feel that way?

I honestly didn't

I came pretty close in some years. But my life in general was plagued by dysthymia, generalized anxiety disorder and social anxiety + an almost permanent cutting feeling of unworthiness and inadequacy.

That's what makes me wanna CTB mainly. Not saying major depression isn't horrible. But it's the chronicity of things that make it unbearable in the present.

What was your experience? How did you get to wish for CTB?

Last time i felt really good?

The day the person i really loved finally told me he loved me too.

That same person ended up leaving me not even a month after, causing me to get even more depressed.

 

[RichardFirst]

I've been troubled by anxiety and depression my entire life, but the last time that I felt genuinely good was Christmas 2018. I was just starting a new job with a much higher salary, moving house and really enjoying my hobbies. As it happened, I was actually embarking on the series of mistakes that today have me wanting to die, but I did not know that at the time.

 

[yyytry]

I think I felt good when my career was starting.
I felt proud that I could finally take care of myself and have fun with my job.

But when the work politics starting pulling me in, I didn't know how to handle it properly.

High functioning autism really fucked with my savviness for social dynamics.
My genius made me egotistical at times.
I was right often.
Being the protected species, isolated me.
Drove me to drink and self destruct.

 

[Zegers]

The last time I was really happy was ages ago, I don't even know why or when I was happy, I'm not even ok, I just exist in all of this chaos. I have to physically force myself to laugh or smile, everyone keeps telling me to smile more and be happy. I can't, I just can't force it anymore.

It's so hard to smile or be naturally cheerful when there is literally no reason to... I tried the gratitude journal but i felt pathetic with things like "I went for a walk for half an hour and came back" unfortunately, barely anything to be grateful.

 

[Techef]

I can't remember, especially if we're setting the bar high with really good being at the "awesome" level. Don't want to say never since that would be overly dramatic. Years of brain fog has done a number on my memory. If I had to guess, most likely candidates would be 15 years ago, 20 years ago, and a few moments during childhood (despite all the abuse).

 

[locked*n*loaded]

About 30 years ago for a fleeting moment in time.

 

[MiraiShisen]

From health perspective 2020 was best for me, it was after 21 days of fasting on water, I felt good for a while it was really enjoyable, the last year of my life when there was still hope for me.

 

[Griffith_NPD]

I felt amazing the day my Love told me that they loved me as well and wanted to try dating with me, it was the greatest feeling in my life, the next day was terrible, everything went downhill and they didn't truly meant what they said.

 

[ctb86]

A few days ago. But times like that are nothing but a shiny drop in a sea of darkness.

 

[SolomonKado]

i would have to say when I was in the military. I always had a rough time around people and my job was perfect to spend time by myself for long periods of time.

I was a cook on a submarine making 150 meals a day everyday. The cooks kitchen also was only big enough for them and that's it. I either worked 7 am- 7 pm or visa versa. I loved doing it because I had to cook great meals.

My best times is when I've spent a lot of work and someone comes and tells me my cooking was awesome. For example 1 person told me my cookies were just like his grandma made. I was proud of myself for putting in so much work and also be successful at it. Those were my good times

Those times were usually ruined when other people got involved…

 

[kkkangkkk]

Before COVID

 

[venin]

Never?

I know that sounds dramatic but I really can't remember ever feeling okay. My mom recently told me I've been this way since I was a toddler. I'm 32 now.

that's awful…

I feel amazing when I cut myself. Thinking about it makes me feel like a freak though

Never did that but it's interesting to me. I understand it intelectually but have never had the urge to do it. How did it start?

It's been way to long. I don't even feel like myself anymore. The person I once was is long gone. At this point, I see no return.

Sorry to hear that

Last time i felt really good?

The day the person i really loved finally told me he loved me too.

That same person ended up leaving me not even a month after, causing me to get even more depressed.

That's awful… sorry to hear that

About 30 years ago for a fleeting moment in time.

Sorry to hear that…

I felt amazing the day my Love told me that they loved me as well and wanted to try dating with me, it was the greatest feeling in my life, the next day was terrible, everything went downhill and they didn't truly meant what they said.

That's fckd up… sorry you had to experience that

A few days ago. But times like that are nothing but a shiny drop in a sea of darkness.

I really know what you mean…

i would have to say when I was in the military. I always had a rough time around people and my job was perfect to spend time by myself for long periods of time.

I was a cook on a submarine making 150 meals a day everyday. The cooks kitchen also was only big enough for them and that's it. I either worked 7 am- 7 pm or visa versa. I loved doing it because I had to cook great meals.

My best times is when I've spent a lot of work and someone comes and tells me my cooking was awesome. For example 1 person told me my cookies were just like his grandma made. I was proud of myself for putting in so much work and also be successful at it. Those were my good times

Those times were usually ruined when other people got involved…

I'm sorry they're gone…