Discussion When you have wounds, do you touch them deliberately to feel pain?

[Shimidori]

I think that one of the earliest signs I remember of something being terribly wrong with my mind was when I started to realize that, when I am harmed in any way, my first instinct is to force myself to feel more pain.

I recall having a cut on my finger just a week ago, and literally I would feel nervous when not touching the wound and experiencing its sharp pain, and it isn't even close to the first time I have done something like that. It just kicks in as an instinct for me to enjoy feeling pain in my own body... Now whether that is to remind myself that I'm alive, or because I want that pain to just finish me for good, that's a question that I'm not capable of answering.

That said, does anyone ever do that? Not necessarily self harm (even though I've done it), but to make yourself feel pain by forcing your wounds?

 

[SecretDissociation]

I use pain to ground myself. Recently I've been anxious and I've been scratching the back of my hands raw. I think it helps with grounding and also as maybe like punishment?? for being anxious. When I feel pain I feel validated. I do also do anything in my power to stop healing because I sh and I see healing as a lack of proof that I am suffering, that and it is also self-harming behavior.

Not sure if I answered your query? Hope it helps <3

 

[Abyssal]

Yeah, but then again I have skin picking syndrome. I'm always bleeding lol

 

[EvisceratedJester]

I think you may just be craving the endorphins. When we are injured, our brains releases endorphins to help with relive some of the pain and stress that comes from it. These endorphins are part of why people self harm (I understand you don't, I'm just using sh to demonstrate my point).

While I do sh, even in cases in which I get injured on accident I still do enjoy the pain I feel from it. I Especially like putting pressure on my bruises. I also have a habit of pulling out hair from certain parts of my body and the pain I get from digging my tweezers into my skin to try and pull out a hard to reach strand of hair, along with the pain and satisfaction of finally pulling out said hair, creates an unbelievably good feeling that's hard to describe. I usually carcass the area afterwards in order to feel more pain and to bask in the feeling of the hair being gone.

 

[Morte]

Yes, some bruises, especially on the side of the fingertips.