When was the last time you felt true happiness?

[forgotten15]

I have never experienced true happiness. I've had better days throughout life and there were things that made me happy, but it was never true happiness. I was always a depressed person deep down…had a kinda rough childhood because of the phisycal and verbal abuse my mother put me through so I became suicidal at a very young age ( around 5-6 as I remember i had my first thoughts about death, which I don't even know where I got them from and how could i think about ending my life from such a young age). I went through life until now with the desire of wanting to die, but my SI are too strong so I never went through with it. I am hoping I will get the courage to ctb soon, as I feel there is nothing left for me here. 30 years of this crappy existence are enough.

 

[irememberinnocence]

Do you have an idea of what happiness would look like for you?

Personally I've experienced happiness even this year. I've always been someone who is chasing my dreams. The main reason I'm so unhappy now is because I no longer have the health to do what I want and I also don't feel physically unable to cope with life's stressors anymore.

 

[LonelyBrazilian]

Childhood for sure. I loved watching anime on tv and playing soccer.

 

[user_name_here]

When I finished a tub of Ben & Jerry's karma sutra while binging squid game.

I feel like the more suicidal I've become the more I enjoy the small things.

Video games still bring me some joy and temporary escape too.

 

[TheHatedOne]

when me and my partner met for the first time and spent the first night together.

 

[pipa]

When I was a little child

 

[Scribble Fan]

When I was very small... it's been so long since I felt any happiness.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Listening to some of the leaked Pokémon Brilliant Diamond and Shining Pearl OST and finding out that a majority of the tracks actually sound really good.

 

[Midgardsorm]

I felt some of true happiness once, it was simply a magical experience, but I don't think I will ever again. Especially because most of this moments either are tainted with bad memories now or my past experiences of trauma simply takes away most of the joy if I ever feel that again.

Some sliver of it came a few months ago when I was finally understood by someone for a brief moment. Unfortunately it didn't last much.

 

[completely-done]

I don't know what that is. I only know how to imitate it.

 

[Mr2005]

I could say 2003 or 2005 for different reasons but 2009 at the absolute latest. I've never been the same after that

 

[LastFlowers]

Never truly.

 

[demuic]

2015

 

[Death_of_a_Phynixx]

I am trying my best to find even a snippet of a happy memory, but I have been miserable for so long that I just cannot remember. All the bad memories are too dominant and have taken over my mind.

 

[angiegirl30]

I would have to say this morning when I spent some time with my grandson. He's 1 1/2 and absolutely amazing. Just pure innocence and joy in everything he does. Children are just amazing. They are a true light in this otherwise shit hole of a planet.

 

[LionsTigersAndBears]

The first time I was happy started on the 25th December 1991 when social services sent me to a foster family in Margate. That ended roughly a year later when I was moved to children home in Northeast London.

 

[Squalo]

I think I've never been happy in my life, even as a child I always cried.

 

[fatefulstillness]

I use the term "happiness" loosely. Calm is my most positive mood. If I feel happy, it's usually attached with self-destructive behavior and suicidal ideation comes dangerously close to suicidal intent. Not that I'm complaining.

 

[PrisonBreak]

2012 is the last year I felt peace. My life ended a year after when I was diagnosed with mental illnesses. I experienced another setback in 2016 when I developed tinnitus, which only heightened the severity of my mental illness. 2021 was a breaking point for me and my illnesses reached a new plateau, too catastrophic that I saw no point in life or hope in recovery. I have not learned any lesson/s from my setbacks but I have learned that life is not meant for me to live or enjoy.

 

[whatevs]

Javier was having a party in his parent's country house. They are loaded. We got drunk, there were plenty of girls. However, me and my roommate didn't get lucky, so we just pestered for hours a friend that was trying to have a threesome or something like that. With noises, moans, mockery, knocking on the door. Eventually, Tomy stormed out of the room in underwear and tried to chase us down, failing to control his laughter.

 

[TerminalConscience]

I believe 6 years old. Which shouldn't count lol.

 

[Foresight]

This afternoon watching a fun video.

 

[markimobzzdeasui]

I don't even remember what that means anymore. I spent most of my life in suffering and even the happier moments had a hint and taste of sadness. But relatively speaking, I think in 2012 and some part of 2013 for different reasons.

 

[Shu]

2012 is the last year I felt peace. My life ended a year after when I was diagnosed with mental illnesses. I experienced another setback in 2016 when I developed tinnitus, which only heightened the severity of my mental illness. 2021 was a breaking point for me and my illnesses reached a new plateau, too catastrophic that I saw no point in life or hope in recovery. I have not learned any lesson/s from my setbacks but I have learned that life is not meant for me to live or enjoy.

Everything changed in 2012. It's weird.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

Maybe in 2014/2015 when I was distracted from my main problem. Then I made a mistake and lost that happiness. RIP.

 

[onlyanimalsaregood]

In January of this year