wildflowers1996

wildflowers1996

Mage
Oct 14, 2023
555
I just don't know what is best.

I'm 27. My parents had me late in life. They're 73 and 71.
I have a brother who is 30 and he's married.

My dad had a stroke some years back, and he's physically ok but partially mentally affected. He can look after himself but he just barely communicates with my mum. She doesn't have any support from him.

I want to ctb now. But there's a part of me saying "you should wait until your parents pass away".

But that could be another 2 decades and I just don't feel I can hold on anywhere near that long.

Plus if I wait until then, I leave my brother with no immediate family.

I feel so, so, selfish. I feel like a horrible person for wanting to ctb now. I don't want to hurt my mum. But I also don't think I could cope with losing my parents. I want to avoid that pain but then I'm passing it onto them instead.
 
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LunarLight

LunarLight

i'm a loser, a failure
Apr 3, 2024
1,368
You're the only one who can decide. We can't advise you what time would be the best.
However, I'd insist, you're the only one who can decide. It's up to you. That means you shouldn't worry about your family. The most important thing to you is you.
 
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sussshiroll

sussshiroll

Student
Mar 17, 2023
105
Your dad had a stroke and your mom are supporting him, You should help support your dad and mom, What you think gonna happen?
They gonna end up with a life threatening stroke, Your family deserve to be happy in their last days.
 
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wildflowers1996

wildflowers1996

Mage
Oct 14, 2023
555
Your dad had a stroke and your mom are supporting him, You should help support your dad and mom, What you think gonna happen?
They gonna end up with a life threatening stroke, Your family deserve to be happy in their last days.
I don't want to hurt them
I just can't imagine living another 20 years feeling like this
 
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sussshiroll

sussshiroll

Student
Mar 17, 2023
105
I don't want to hurt them
I just can't imagine living another 20 years feeling like this
I wish your parents a long life, But average age is 75-80 why not wait and see what happens. And your parents is gonna be happy in their last days
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,877
It's up to the individual if they wish to continue suffering or not, it's a personal decision, not something for others to decide. I don't believe that anyone is obligated to or should be forced to continue delaying their inevitable fate, forcing people to suffer against their wishes would be extreme cruelty to me.
 
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Checker130

Checker130

Member
Feb 22, 2024
41
How do you feel? Is it anxiety, dread and depression?
 
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B

bipbapbop

Experienced
Mar 7, 2024
276
Your dad had a stroke and your mom are supporting him, You should help support your dad and mom, What you think gonna happen?
They gonna end up with a life threatening stroke, Your family deserve to be happy in their last days.
I don't think you should be putting more pressure on OP about what you think is the right thing for them to do. This forum should be a safe place for people to make their own choices without the standard pressures of society.

OP, I think that you should focus on what you want in this world. No one can (or should) make this decision for you.
 
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sussshiroll

sussshiroll

Student
Mar 17, 2023
105
I don't think you should be putting more pressure on OP about what you think is the right thing for them to do. This forum should be a safe place for people to make their own choices without the standard pressures of society.

OP, I think that you should focus on what you want in this world. No one can (or should) make this decision for you.
Im just giving my optinion, We all don't know what to do....
 
goodoldnoname923

goodoldnoname923

Wanting to find peace
Mar 28, 2024
834
my advice would be to go when you think there is no point to go on anymore,when all enjoyment in your life is gone and not obligation,you said it yourself your family will be upset regardless of when you go so ultimately I wouldn't take that into consideration

Just think about yourself do you have any reason to live now? Do you have enough courage to go now? Is there anything else you wanna live for or wait for?

Thats my too sense on the matter but there is probably may other ways you could think about it or go about it
 

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