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D

draw a circle

out.
Apr 10, 2020
300
When I became an adult and went to college. I started to question existence and found that life sucks for the most part, you go to school, earn a degree, come out, slave away for a majority of your life (assuming you didn't die of other causes beforehand), and then when you are old and ready for retirement, you just retire and wither away. No thanks, that's not the life that I want. This isn't even counting my other reasons for other societal shittiness, shitty human nature (humanity itself), and personal & philosophical reasons.
Hard same. I'm in my last year of college and struggling with completing my thesis while not feeling up to graduate and face the "real world". The real world is a whole lotta bullshit. I don't mind having a job and work, but my parents would want me to do something great and honestly I just wanted to work something bare minimum. I could survive, I think, but I won't be happy, what's with my anxiety tendencies, debilitating fear of failure, my lackluster social skills, and how I'm not a natural hard worker. I could just not die but that's it. I think it was two years ago when I realized this.
 
woxihuanni

woxihuanni

Illuminated
Aug 19, 2019
3,298
That others find me unfit to live and I have no place, I discovered when I waa a toddler. But I don't understand why or accept it gracefully. I always bargain with my services to be given some little place to squeeze into. I really am very useful for all who wants to make use of me, what is so deeply disgusting and subhuman about me that I am not allowed to exist whatEVER I bring to the table?