Insomniac

Insomniac

𝔄 𝔲 𝔱 𝔦 𝔰 𝔪
May 21, 2021
1,357
didn't he message you recently?
he did.. he also later invited me and insisted on me being present the day of the wedding... I'm really going to kill myself this time.
 
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LONE WOLF.

LONE WOLF.

PUNISHER.
Nov 4, 2020
1,988
Have just got back from the vet's and my Best Friend 'Maximus'🐕 is now at rest! He went quietly and peacefully and is now laid in his bed until the cremation company come to collect him tmrw! I feel lost and Numb😥💔
A Sincere Heartfelt Thank You to those who responded to my post, You've helped me get through a difficult time,all though l still haven't worked out what is a appropriate amount of time to grieve for a Dog! I get Max's ashes returned home next Saturday! Again Thank You 🐺🙏
 
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lili

lili

Specialist
Feb 17, 2022
319
I long for a sense of community and connection with people. But every time I make an effort to do this I come off as manic or too crazy, and feel ridiculous after. People are always laughing and sharing stories of all the stupidities i do. So I feel I am the problem inherently and it's hard to find a way to function like this.

Ive always found it hard to fit into this monogamous world, I happen to always cheat or stir some drama, with multiple people.
I feel that I am this agent of chaos, and I don't mean to be. I try so hard to stop it but somehow things always escalate and I'm tired of it all.
 
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hungry_ghost

hungry_ghost

جهاد
Feb 21, 2022
517
Having doubts about the "church", and honestly just being so devoid of zeal that I don't even want to go liturgy at all.

It's like I can't be myself around them. I cuss, I'm prone to being brash, having inappropriate or dark humor, and being incredibly blunt and cynical.

When I'm there, I have to put on this pathologically polite persona that makes me feel like a fucking psychopath, lol.
 
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L

Life sucks

Visionary
Apr 18, 2018
2,134
I tried playing and doing things and my mind is seriously deteriorating and very terrible performance
 
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Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ Sometimes I'm stressed
Jul 1, 2020
6,885
Everyone hates me. No one's said it, they just don't talk to me.
 
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LONE WOLF.

LONE WOLF.

PUNISHER.
Nov 4, 2020
1,988
My dog died, my boyfriend makes me feel like a failure, a lifetime of failure and abuse and pain. Physical health failing, finances ruined, failing out of school, no job, no prospects, no friends.
@quothTheRaven9, My dog just died too, You have a friend here 💐
 
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LONE WOLF.

LONE WOLF.

PUNISHER.
Nov 4, 2020
1,988
I think I'm losing the sense of living, it feels like a dead body forced to be alive
I too feel like a Reanimated corpse being forced to go through the motions of living against my will!
 
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symphony

symphony

surving hour-by-hour
Mar 12, 2022
779
Anhedonia. I can't bring myself to do the one productive thing I need to do today, and even then, I can't manage to successfully distract myself from the pain. Nothing's sticking.
 
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A

allesistgut

Experienced
Jan 22, 2022
275
i just want to ctb already.
 
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L

Life sucks

Visionary
Apr 18, 2018
2,134
It's very painful and no method. This human body is so wrong
 
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Tristan

Tristan

Don’t cry for me, I’m already dead.
Mar 21, 2022
252
that i have a new day to endure.
 
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I

ineedtoctb

Member
Feb 21, 2022
55
I'm gonna have to go through the same routine. And still no materials to ctb
 
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Alcoholic Teletubby

Alcoholic Teletubby

Rip in piss
Jan 10, 2022
388
My final semester of college classes.
 
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ImsooDone1N

ImsooDone1N

Arcanist
Nov 22, 2018
846
I've don't even know how to describe this. But I'm the worst I've ever been in my life. I have know one. The amount of time I spend on the forum is generally proportional to my emotional state. Been "active" on the forum more in the past few months than in a while.
I thought I was suffering before, but this is a new level. I really don't know if I'll make it another 30days. I would give anything to know what's wrong with me. Im isolating more & I'm just so apathetic. I'm also pathetic.
 
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I

ineedtoctb

Member
Feb 21, 2022
55
I've don't even know how to describe this. But I'm the worst I've ever been in my life. I have know one. The amount of time I spend on the forum is generally proportional to my emotional state. Been "active" on the forum more in the past few months than in a while.
I thought I was suffering before, but this is a new level. I really don't know if I'll make it another 30days. I would give anything to know what's wrong with me. Im isolating more & I'm just so apathetic. I'm also pathetic.
I feel the same way
 
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L

Life sucks

Visionary
Apr 18, 2018
2,134
Feeling tired all the time
 
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S

silent staring void

Student
Jan 22, 2020
145
I'm still so bitter and resentful over things that happened two and a half years ago everyday GRRRR how do I chill?
 
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Ashu

Ashu

novelist, sanskritist, Canadian living in India
Nov 13, 2021
714
My marriage is again on the verge of collapse, but unfortunately it's not going to collapse, now or ever.
 
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B

BrokenLine

Experienced
Jul 13, 2019
255
Life, and the fact I need to try out some stuff i can only do late at night and by then I'll be to tired to try shit. Then rinse and repeat tomorrow.
 
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L

Life sucks

Visionary
Apr 18, 2018
2,134
Struggling to type my final post
 
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Chiisai

Chiisai

To infinity and beyond!
Sep 1, 2021
754
I am now broke after giving everything to my family. I have spent all what little I have left for me on "last meals" yet I still havent gained back my courage to CTB because I no longer want to feel more pain from all the attempts I did. I am just hoping psychogenic death gets me before I run out of time.
 
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DunnoWhyButYeah

DunnoWhyButYeah

~*-*~
Apr 3, 2020
385
I almost died 3 years ago. I'm still here, why?
 
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Crazy4u

Crazy4u

Enlightened
Sep 29, 2021
1,318
I can't find a solution to my only obstacle. I want to ctb it is enough
 
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LONE WOLF.

LONE WOLF.

PUNISHER.
Nov 4, 2020
1,988
Have just got back from the vet's and my Best Friend 'Maximus'🐕 is now at rest! He went quietly and peacefully and is now laid in his bed until the cremation company come to collect him tmrw! I feel lost and Numb😥💔
Thursday afternoon at 2pm my Dog's ashes were returned home to me in a Scattertube where he now rests beside his predecessor in a display cabinet until my time comes and we're released at the same time to go over the bridge together 😥
 
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apoptosis

apoptosis

rest easy in sleep eternal
Mar 25, 2022
37
knowing that every day is only more work, more responsibilities, more boredom, more stress, more reasons to be depressed.
 
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D

Deleted member 8975

Guest
My existence.
 
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U

Unicornsrnot4dislife

Not meant for this world…….
Nov 12, 2021
128
It's my mums birthday today (she died) and I'm in emotional and mental pain. I'm feeling impulsive and just want to drink all the pain away
 
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ImsooDone1N

ImsooDone1N

Arcanist
Nov 22, 2018
846
Seriously?. That I'm not physically dead. I'm just existing in the worse possible way. I've to change this; this….I- can not continue.
 
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NSA

NSA

Your friendly neighborhood agent
Feb 21, 2022
262
So many goddamn things.
 
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