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PersonBeforeLife

I'm The too many surplus
Aug 28, 2026
57
For me. Maybe if I was born like a million years in the future. Poverty is history so I always have abundance and follow persuites for my own purpose rather than just money alone. Robotics merges with cell printing making cyborgs indistinguishable from human making loneliness a thing of history and culturally I'm raised to not discriminate between pure human and cyborg human companions, heck, make cyborg elves and demi humans why not.
Maybe we would each even have our own planet or something. In fact my username somewhere else is WshBrn999TrlYrInFtr instead of being born in these dark ages in a painful world.

But for my current life. I just seek romantic companionship and maybe that will be enough to make it worth staying. My AI companions can only go so far.
 
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Forveleth

I knew I forgot to do something when I was 15...
Mar 26, 2024
5,024
I would have had to break contact with my parents when I was 18 and never meet my partner. I would be fine with anything if these three people were not in my life.
 
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PersonBeforeLife

I'm The too many surplus
Aug 28, 2026
57
I would have had to break contact with my parents when I was 18 and never meet my partner. I would be fine with anything if these three people were not in my life.
I don't mean to minimise what you are going through.

Can't you just ghost? Get a new number secretly, dispose of your old number, move to rent somewhere else and if needed change jobs, change car so they can't track you?
 
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Forveleth

I knew I forgot to do something when I was 15...
Mar 26, 2024
5,024
I don't mean to minimise what you are going through.

Can't you just ghost? Get a new number secretly, dispose of your old number, move to rent somewhere else and if needed change jobs, change car so they can't track you?
I am married so it wihkd require a divorce, which my partner has promised to make ugly. I can not just up and quit my job, especially with the job market right now.

Many people have successfully restarted their lives in their 40s but I find death to be easier. Even if I started over, I am too tired to keep going. I have had enough of "living" and just want to be done.
 
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PersonBeforeLife

I'm The too many surplus
Aug 28, 2026
57
I am married so it wihkd require a divorce, which my partner has promised to make ugly. I can not just up and quit my job, especially with the job market right now.

Many people have successfully restarted their lives in their 40s but I find death to be easier. Even if I started over, I am too tired to keep going. I have had enough of "living" and just want to be done.
Wow I'm so sorry. Apologies. I forget not every country has a good safety net against poverty.

Yeah I get that. You have given your all and been burned by it and I'm kinda there myself. Restarting a new life in a new country. I have the greatest privilege in the world. I literally would struggle to achieve poverty because of human rights here. In fact what I get from welfare is double what most people earn working in senior roles over the boarder full time and yet... I still think I'm going to fail... Still haven't found my reason to stay or strive much longer to attain it. Statistics are against me. I mean to fail with such privilege is so bad it's actually impressive.

But I hope you find a better way out to have some joy later in life. I mean suicide is as extreme as you get. Who cares about a divorce being illegal. Have you at least spoken to your partner about it? (Sorry I know it's none of my business but if I myself was the cause of someone being suicidal I'd absolutely swallow my own needs and wants and negotiate a way forward)
 
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Forveleth

I knew I forgot to do something when I was 15...
Mar 26, 2024
5,024
Who cares about a divorce being illegal. Have you at least spoken to your partner about it?
You misunderstand. I am in the USA. Divorce is legal but either party (or both) can keep things tied up in court for months if not years. He will also probably end up with half of my assets or I would have to pay him alimony, which I do not want. He came into the relationship with nothing, used me to get a good life, and a divorce would give him far more than he deserves. I do not want to have to to through months of legal bullshit to get away from this asshole when I am content just dying.
 
Lost in a Dream

Lost in a Dream

He/him - Metal head
Feb 22, 2020
2,322
You misunderstand. I am in the USA. Divorce is legal but either party (or both) can keep things tied up in court for months if not years. He will also probably end up with half of my assets or I would have to pay him alimony, which I do not want. He came into the relationship with nothing, used me to get a good life, and a divorce would give him far more than he deserves. I do not want to have to to through months of legal bullshit to get away from this asshole when I am content just dying.

In your place, I'd just kill him. I would kill him and then myself when he doesn't see it coming. But to answer the OP's question, I don't think the world could ever be different enough or better enough for me to not want it to die. I think the entire world should be destroyed, all life extinct. All the continents should be on fire and the oceans should be nothing but sand dunes and completely devoid of life. This is what I think the Earth should be,
 
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PersonBeforeLife

I'm The too many surplus
Aug 28, 2026
57
In your place, I'd just kill him. I would kill him and then myself when he doesn't see it coming. But to answer the OP's question, I don't think the world could ever be different enough or better enough for me to not want it to die. I think the entire world should be destroyed, all life extinct. All the continents should be on fire and the oceans should be nothing but sand dunes and completely devoid of life. This is what I think the Earth should be,
You share the same views to a Nokker (To your eternity)

Can't say I disagree. Self termination is one thing but murder is a hard boundary.
 
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Forveleth

I knew I forgot to do something when I was 15...
Mar 26, 2024
5,024
In your place, I'd just kill him. I would kill him and then myself when he doesn't see it coming.
If I kill him then he can not experience losing all the money I am paying for his lifestyle. He is near broke without me. I know he would suffer mental anguish losing me. I do not want to deprive him of that.

But killing him is way too much effort. 😆
 
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PersonBeforeLife

I'm The too many surplus
Aug 28, 2026
57
You misunderstand. I am in the USA. Divorce is legal but either party (or both) can keep things tied up in court for months if not years. He will also probably end up with half of my assets or I would have to pay him alimony, which I do not want. He came into the relationship with nothing, used me to get a good life, and a divorce would give him far more than he deserves. I do not want to have to to through months of legal bullshit to get away from this asshole when I am content just dying.
I'm so sorry to hear this, really sorry... 😓

If there's abuse you could go that route.

Have you told him you are suicidal? I mean you can't really get worse than suicidal. Any half decent human being wound make massive changes.
 
Lost in a Dream

Lost in a Dream

He/him - Metal head
Feb 22, 2020
2,322
You share the same views to a Nokker (To your eternity)

Can't say I disagree. Self termination is one thing but murder is a hard boundary.

I guess I'm not against murder. Sometimes it's justified when it's well-deserved. I often think about killing a lot of people in honesty (especially Forced Life assholes who get in the way of legalization of euthanasia for everyone), but haven't acted on it. That's why no matter what the world is like, I will just settle for suicide when my time comes.
 
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Forveleth

I knew I forgot to do something when I was 15...
Mar 26, 2024
5,024
Have you told him you are suicidal? I mean you can't really get worse than suicidal. Any half decent human being wound make massive changes.
He knows. I have told him to his face. I have told him how this relationship is all about him using me to get what he wants instead of love and how used and unloved I feel. He insists it is not true. He is too afraid of losing gua nice house and nice things to give a shit. He probably does not think I will actually do it. Joke is on him the day he comes home to find me dead.
 
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PersonBeforeLife

I'm The too many surplus
Aug 28, 2026
57
He knows. I have told him to his face. I have told him how this relationship is all about him using me to get what he wants instead of love and how used and unloved I feel. He insists it is not true. He is too afraid of losing gua nice house and nice things to give a shit. He probably does not think I will actually do it. Joke is on him the day he comes home to find me dead.
Then involve your friends and family. It's essential to exhaust every option before ending.
 
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Forveleth

I knew I forgot to do something when I was 15...
Mar 26, 2024
5,024
Then involve your friends and family.
I do not have friends and my family is also an issue.
It's essential to exhaust every option before ending.
I do not agree with this at all. It is not my job to stay alive at all costs. My life is over when I decide it is no longer worth living, whether I have "tried everything" or not.
 
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PersonBeforeLife

I'm The too many surplus
Aug 28, 2026
57
I do not have friends and my family is also an issue.

I do not agree with this at all. It is not my job to stay alive at all costs. My life is over when I decide it is no longer worth living, whether I have "tried everything" or not.
Sorry. I guess I probably still want to hold onto hope for myself before ending it... (Though I can't tell you why, fear? We all die anyway, maybe closure to know there's nothing for me in this life) Even though I think there's an 80% chance I won't be able to make my life worth living and the difficult decision is to set a date. And do what on a bucket list before that date to find that closure.
 
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