I have watched my life unravel before my eyes. It happened slowly, but I soon found myself repeating the life of my father: list all my friends, family, and property. I have done exactly what I saw him do when I was growing up. I vowed to never be like him and yet I have become him.
Seeing where he is today has convinced me that there is no hope and I will end up the same way. So why bother going through all of the mess of I can just ctb and skip that? I've already suffered enough. This year alone is enough to convince me that life is no longer worth living.
It's not what I want to do but it is what I believe is best for me and for my family. Even if I get better and find a way to function in a meaningful way, the damage is already done. I missed my chances to move forward and reap the rewards of life.
Seeing where he is today has convinced me that there is no hope and I will end up the same way. So why bother going through all of the mess of I can just ctb and skip that? I've already suffered enough. This year alone is enough to convince me that life is no longer worth living.
It's not what I want to do but it is what I believe is best for me and for my family. Even if I get better and find a way to function in a meaningful way, the damage is already done. I missed my chances to move forward and reap the rewards of life.
