
kappa
Experienced
- Apr 2, 2019
- 233
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If my health would improveIs there is one thing (or several things) that could happen in your life right now, that would prevent you from ctb?
It's also okay to say that, ultimately, nothing will stop you.
I really relate to this.I thought for a moment and came up with some answers - money, health, etc
but then I boiled those down to find out what's behind those answers
money - I'm sick of worrying about it, I don't want to be homeless
health - I'm sick of being in pain and I worry about how much more pain, how much longer
mental health - PTSD makes me feel like I'm in serious life or death danger that I cannot escape
its really all about safety it seems
safety - for me to not CTB I would need to feel safe - from becoming homeless, from pain, from the uncontrollable fear
weird, I want to harm myself because I don't feel safe? strange how it doesn't inspire me to try to be safe but inspires me to try to die
right now I'm guessing this is because I don't know how to find a way to feel safe, but I do know how to find a way to die
maybe I believe that it's all inescapable till death, that death is the only way to be safe - nothing can ever hurt me again once I'm dead
The minute men could show up with their time machine, zap me back to my child hood, let me record all the neglect and abuse and then me report it to CPS.Is there is one thing (or several things) that could happen in your life right now, that would prevent you from ctb?
It's also okay to say that, ultimately, nothing will stop you.
If I won the lottery and had the money to do what I want, it could substantially delay my suicide.Is there is one thing (or several things) that could happen in your life right now, that would prevent you from ctb?
It's also okay to say that, ultimately, nothing will stop you.
Is there is one thing (or several things) that could happen in your life right now, that would prevent you from ctb?
It's also okay to say that, ultimately, nothing will stop you.
If I had a normal youth and had integrated myself into society properly and didn't screw up my education I might not want to CTB.Is there is one thing (or several things) that could happen in your life right now, that would prevent you from ctb?
It's also okay to say that, ultimately, nothing will stop you.