Discussion What are your top reasons to ctb?

[Things2do1st&ThenCtb]

I am much the same, but I've built up tools to deal with social situations. It is very draining.

Indeed.

Your situation sounds more complicated than mine. Being a dad --- What do you do with that?

 

[WrongWayGoBack]

Indeed.

Your situation sounds more complicated than mine. Being a dad --- What do you do with that?

Rereading my post I might have come across in a way that was unintended - replace 'but' with 'and', reading as "like you, I use tools to deal with people and it's exhausting." Sorry if it came across the wrong way.

Yep, being a dad. In the right situation, I'd do a lot with it. In this situation, it is doomed. So I'm doing what I started planning two months ago.

 

[Tuan]

just sick of myself...

 

[TracieB]

Too long suffering with an illness that's not getting better, if anything it's getting worse. Isolated, no future partner with this illness, no job because of illness, few family members I'm still in contact with, concerns about getting older, housing etc. Just had enough.

 

[Things2do1st&ThenCtb]

Rereading my post I might have come across in a way that was unintended - replace 'but' with 'and', reading as "like you, I use tools to deal with people and it's exhausting." Sorry if it came across the wrong way.

Yep, being a dad. In the right situation, I'd do a lot with it. In this situation, it is doomed. So I'm doing what I started planning two months ago.

No worries. I appreciate the clarification.

For me, October is an important month. I have always felt the best in late October. When there is no threat of the 'happiness' of spring or heat of summer; Just the oncoming coolness and peace of fall and winter.

Have you figured out when and where and how?

 

[Kassender]

Loneliness.
And being me.

 

[JayAOA]

Bad trip opened things up. I have nothing do, nowhere to be. Needing drugs just to feel normal. Took a read of the "The Last Messiah" and relevant works and it's all sealed now.

 

[great-ape99]

Let's see

1. I don't want to play Russian roulette with my dignity leaving it up to the system.
2. I don't want to die a painful death.
3. I want control of when and where and how I die.

 

[QueenEtna]

Just the fact that everything in life is pointless, we go to school and study then we go to work and slave away until we are old then we die. I just lay there in bed all night thinking about it and because of that I hardly get any sleep.. It's currently 1:30am and I have work in a few hours.

 

[throwaway123]

I hate this question. What are your top reasons to stay alive? I don't have any.

That should say it all.

 

[Deleted_9cKnXB34QG]

Took a read of the "The Last Messiah" and relevant works and it's all sealed now.

Discovering antinatalism was a last nail in my coffin, I mean this philosophy is like the ultimate red pill.
Once you see life for what it really is it's very hard to continue... everything becomes absurd, nothing but pointless suffering.

I don't know how Cioran managed to live 84 years without blowing his brains out.

 

[Cold]

Loneliness.
And being me.

This.

 

[WrongWayGoBack]

No worries. I appreciate the clarification.

For me, October is an important month. I have always felt the best in late October. When there is no threat of the 'happiness' of spring or heat of summer; Just the oncoming coolness and peace of fall and winter.

Have you figured out when and where and how?

I'm already behind on my plan, I was hoping to be gone by early August this year. But it took that long just to obtain the benzos. I'm looking at a late Sept departure. The season doesn't matter to me so much as the need to settle my estate as soon as possible.

 

[TAW122]

Aspergers (life long, uncurable condition) which affect my ability to socialize, make friends, maintain relationships, and of course getting around in society, financial problems especially due to lack of job opportunities (let alone the ones that I'm suitable for), philosophical reasons (right to die, never consented to being born, etc.), and of course, knowing that life is just bullshit and I'd rather not wait until I'm less able bodied and then die; I want to die on my own terms.

 

[bigj75]

Aspergers (life long, uncurable condition) which affect my ability to socialize, make friends, maintain relationships, and of course getting around in society, financial problems especially due to lack of job opportunities (let alone the ones that I'm suitable for), philosophical reasons (right to die, never consented to being born, etc.), and of course, knowing that life is just bullshit and I'd rather not wait until I'm less able bodied and then die; I want to die on my own terms.

wow hits me the same

 

[CentreMid]

I'm so fucking useless, I have a job but I hate it, I can't go on like this knowing that all of my efforts will lead me nowhere. I refuse to be just another slave to life.

 

[lostinthedream]

1. Health. I just got a diagnosis of diabetes and its uncontrollable soooo I'm rather fucked, my body is going to shut down or I'm going to end up being blind or a vegetable.
2. I don't have a wife gf or significant other or any children i packed light for this incarnation
3. I never got the education or really played society's "game" I'm worthless from society's point of view
4. I feel complete, I feel I've been and done and experienced everything I am meant to here, it's a disappointment to wake up every morning

 

[wanttodie]

m 55 have no place or purpose in life i hate my life and living
all so I suffer from depression so sick of life after 55 years I'm looking to end my life very soon

 

[Marcos]

I found out that I won't be able to achieve the dreams that I have. I started my own business a couple of years ago but it didn't go very well. Now I'm broke and during the last two years I have been looking for jobs but I wasn't successful.

I have only a few friends that I barely see. I have very limited social skills, so it takes me a lot of effort meeting new people.

I'm average-looking but I've never been in a relationship. I cannot keep a interesting conversation because I run out of things to say.

I know that I should not make comparisons, but it seems to me that other people are able to move forward with their lives. They have a successful career, travel the world, get married, etc. But I feel stuck in life.

I have very high expectations in life but my reality is different. This leads me to unhappiness. The higher your expectations, the less happy you are.

My reasoning is as follows: If I cannot live the life that want, I'm better off dead. I used to be optimistic towards my future but recently I've lost all my hopes. I cannot keep fighting.

 

[Deafsn0w]

1. No one gives shit about me
2. Everyone ignores me
3. No friends

 

[bigj75]

my health is getting worse. I can't work properly anymore. I'll eventually end up homeless or in jail because of it so i have to kill myself before that happens.

 

[Deleted member 1768]

Quite honestly I can't pin down my number 1 reason cause there are so many and each one I feel emotional and physical embedded with. If anything it's a tie between my back/knee problems and the fact that I'll have to work manual labor jobs for the rest of my life. I also don't see the point of getting older and while at best your able to tolerate the pain of living. I also have financial problems that'll bind me to becoming a slave to this system for the rest of my life or better yet become homeless, Yay! Also as some of you have stated it yourselves, you can't see the point if most of the time we'll be suffering with little compensation of dopamine rushing. There's more to my reasons as yours are too. Apologies if I sound prudish.

...I am alive.

 

[midastic]

Guilt, anxiety/fear of certain things along with other reasons are the reason why I wanna CTB. I would provide a full story but if you guys want to hear it, DM me. I don't like it to be shared around in the public forums especially when posting in this site itself increases my anxiety. But I feel like chains are being unlocked whenever i vent some of my real life problems to others.

 

[Gregor samsa]

My main reasons are that I'm stigmitized by family and friends due to mental illness andvi can't be fucked overcoming their blatant ignorance and stupidity. This coupled with the senseless inhumanity that exists in this world leads me to really disassociate from it all and just end it

 

[PatKat]

I am a disabled veteran, I cannot work, I have no friends or family, I have no purpose here, I do not want to do anything except ctb... ugh :(

 

[bigj75]

I am a disabled veteran, I cannot work, I have no friends or family, I have no purpose here, I do not want to do anything except ctb... ugh :(

that sucks. I appreciate your service btw.

 

[PatKat]

that sucks. I appreciate your service btw.

No problem, when i ctb ill just been another stat and im sad about that...

 

[bigj75]

No problem, when i ctb ill just been another stat and im sad about that...

well to me any end to someones suffering is something to be glad for.

 

[Oyashiro-sama]

After reading some stories my problems seem insignificant.

Basically I've never felt comfortable with others, I've always been the weirdo, I can not socialize no matter how hard I try, I'm almost 24 years old and I see how my youth is going away and the only thing I've done is to be in front of the computer, I have been depressed for so long that I do not even remember.

 

[bigj75]

After reading some stories my problems seem insignificant.

Basically I've never felt comfortable with others, I've always been the weirdo, I can not socialize no matter how hard I try, I'm almost 24 years old and I see how my youth is going away and the only thing I've done is to be in front of the computer, I have been depressed for so long that I do not even remember.

suffering is subjective.