venin

venin

Text
Jul 28, 2023
757
Coffee, junk food, porn including spending money on porn (so like OF and some subreddits), chess (only half joking on that). The first 3 are large contributors as to why I feel so disgusting all the time and why I am here. If hating yourself counts as well it's fair to say that's up there...
I feel you 💀
 
Borderline

Borderline

Borderline Personality Disorder
Aug 8, 2023
79
My addiction is self harm for 8 years.
 
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venin

venin

Text
Jul 28, 2023
757
I don't really, I'm not into self harm as I don't desire to suffer and I'm just not that interested in existence in general, existing doesn't appeal to me and my existence will always be very empty, I only wish for permanent, dreamless sleep, existence was just something I was burdened with.
But something must've happened that got you to this point, right?

If you don't wanna share it's perfectly fine but I am curious what made your life be this hollow 🤗
 
Ruma

Ruma

Experienced
Dec 26, 2021
250
Cigarettes and alcohol,they'll eventually kill me if I don't kill myself first! :D
 
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squareminus1

squareminus1

Member
Aug 12, 2023
68

I feel you 💀
It's a vicous cycle, you feel sad, so you cave to your habits, you immediately feel even more disgusting, so you feel even more sad, so you cave again, again, again. And I feel like with porn especially it's so hard to seek help for that since it can seem quite taboo. Anyways sorry for venting on you dude, I wish you luck in your endevours, if you want to try get out of a porn addiction the app Remojo worked alright for me, I did slide back due to my recent moods though, I am sure there are other sources if you try look for them. As for the otherstuff idk, but good luck!
 
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venin

venin

Text
Jul 28, 2023
757
It's a vicous cycle, you feel sad, so you cave to your habits, you immediately feel even more disgusting, so you feel even more sad, so you cave again, again, again. And I feel like with porn especially it's so hard to seek help for that since it can seem quite taboo. Anyways sorry for venting on you dude, I wish you luck in your endevours, if you want to try get out of a porn addiction the app Remojo worked alright for me, I am sure there are other sources if you try look for them. As for the otherstuff idk, but good luck!
Np man. That's why we're here. Vent, connect & make our lives a little bit more bearable. I quit porn but ty anyways 🙏🏼
 
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Unattainable666

Unattainable666

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2023
1,346
I also am tortured by that addiction 🧐
I am so sorry. I know how painful it is to care about someone and get nothing in response. The human race is worthless.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,897
But something must've happened that got you to this point, right?

If you don't wanna share it's perfectly fine but I am curious what made your life be this hollow 🤗
I was born which is what unfortunately happened. Existence was never something good or desirable in the first place, it's the source of all harm and suffering after all and I'm just not meant for existing. Honestly I don't understand why anyone would want to exist, I think that existence was such a horrific mistake in the first place, it's perfectly logical wishing for permanent peace, existing in general is just so pointless and unappealing, only non-existence is acceptable for me.
 
squareminus1

squareminus1

Member
Aug 12, 2023
68
The addiction to continue to be stupid enough to care about people who don't give a shit about me. But I'm learning - just slowly. Oh and wine, coffee, tea.
Gotta say though beinf addicted to wine and coffee makes you a very cool person in my book, stay strong, I wish you luck in your endeavors.
 
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Unattainable666

Unattainable666

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2023
1,346
Gotta say though beinf addicted to wine and coffee makes you a very cool person in my book, stay strong, I wish you luck in your endeavors.
Thanks for your support I appreciate it.
 
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D

doneforlife

Arcanist
Jul 18, 2023
486
I am not addicted to anything. In fact it is one of the reasons I don't have a strong attachment to life. It may sound weird but I have never touched alcohol , cigarettes , or any kind of drugs. I don't play video games. I am not a sports fan either. I have never watched porn. The maximum stuff I have been subjected to is in series like Game of Thrones. May be I am asexual. I don't like those stuff. As far as food is concerned, I have many dietary restrictions due to weak stomach and other diseases. Hence I don't eat junk food either as I have to endure pain the next day.
 
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venin

venin

Text
Jul 28, 2023
757
I am not addicted to anything. In fact it is one of the reasons I don't have a strong attachment to life. It may sound weird but I have never touched alcohol , cigarettes , or any kind of drugs. I don't play video games. I am not a sports fan either. I have never watched porn. The maximum stuff I have been subjected to is in series like Game of Thrones. May be I am asexual. I don't like those stuff. As far as food is concerned, I have many dietary restrictions due to weak stomach and other diseases. Hence I don't eat junk food either as I have to endure pain the next day.
Interesting 😊 usually when you're going through a lot of shit as we have you tend to have all sorts of addictions. That's why I asked in the first place.

But what do you do then when to aleviate the pain on a daily basis? Or even more, when you feel like CTB-ing?
 
020x

020x

Suffering will end when the existence does.
Jul 6, 2023
249
My addictions as hobbies are gaming, porn and cycling. As for medications: just Xanax (Alprazolam) currently 0.5mg a day.
 
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D

doneforlife

Arcanist
Jul 18, 2023
486
Interesting 😊 usually when you're going through a lot of shit as we have you tend to have all sorts of addictions. That's why I asked in the first place.

But what do you do then when to aleviate the pain on a daily basis? Or even more, when you feel like CTB-ing?
I mostly listen to hour long music videos on YouTube. I listen to philosophical debates about existence vs non existence, God vs atheism and other such topics. I browse about similar topics in other social platforms like reddit, qoura.
 
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venin

venin

Text
Jul 28, 2023
757
I mostly listen to hour long music videos on YouTube. I listen to philosophical debates about existence vs non existence, God vs atheism and other such topics. I browse about similar topics in other social platforms like reddit, qoura.
You're ethereal 🤗
 
Takamagahara

Takamagahara

Seeker Of Heaven
Aug 8, 2023
142
In terms of substances, cigarettes, benzos, opioids, painkillers in general. I had a brief stint with cocaine but it ended up being too difficult and expensive to procure; didn't seem worth it.

Fun fact, my addictions are purely psychosomatic; I generally don't feel any withdrawal symptoms. I've quit opioids and cigarettes cold turkey with barely any ill effects twice despite both nicotine and painkillers having well-documented withdrawal hells. It's no coincidence that I only managed to do so once it seemed like life was getting better, and also no coincidence that I fell right back in as soon as things started getting shitty.

In terms of interests and behaviors, video games, sleeping (good practice for being dead), and as of late, hanging out here. I dunno, I just like y'all.
 
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D

doneforlife

Arcanist
Jul 18, 2023
486
I mostly listen to hour long music videos on YouTube. I listen to philosophical debates about existence vs non existence, God vs atheism and other such topics. I browse about similar topics in other social platforms like reddit, qoura.

You're ethereal 🤗
He he. No. May be loosing 3 of my family members to death has pushed me to some kind of rabbit hole. ..
 
venin

venin

Text
Jul 28, 2023
757
In terms of substances, cigarettes, benzos, opioids, painkillers in general. I had a brief stint with cocaine but it ended up being too difficult and expensive to procure; didn't seem worth it.

Fun fact, my addictions are purely psychosomatic; I generally don't feel any withdrawal symptoms. I've quit opioids and cigarettes cold turkey with barely any ill effects twice despite both nicotine and painkillers having well-documented withdrawal hells. It's no coincidence that I only managed to do so once it seemed like life was getting better, and also no coincidence that I fell right back in as soon as things started getting shitty.

In terms of interests and behaviors, video games, sleeping (good practice for being dead), and as of late, hanging out here. I dunno, I just like y'all.
Liking the practice 🫨😅

We like you too, mydude 🫂

Suicidal people are the absolute best 🫶🏼
Apparently 🤐😅🥰
 
Griffith_NPD

Griffith_NPD

I plead of thee have --- S y m p a t h y for me
Jul 21, 2023
89
I'm only addicted to one thing, it's called Love, it's what has killed me...
 
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W

who doesn't matter

Student
Jun 17, 2019
190
Does sleeping count?
 
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Maeve

Maeve

The screaming never stops
Jul 17, 2023
127
Sh (nicotine and alcohol * not really addicted but i was drinking and smoking a lot) but i am working on stopping i got rid of my need to smoke almost entirely i just get the urge if someone is smoking around me. Alcohol is something i try to not do anymore when i don't feel good because last time i drank to much and lost a lot of friends because i told how bad i am doing. Sh is an addiction tho i am working on skills but it is really hard to notice the urge fast enough and to be able to do something bevor it is realy bad:(
 

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